Now and Forever - Mark Feehily Fan Fiction [COMPLETED]

Chapter 50 - Bright light

Song of the chapter:

Brian McKnight - Marry Your Daughter
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Jess' POV

"I want to clarify everything but please don't cut me off, okay?"

I gulped. "Fine."

"Even you want to be mad at me, please just don't cut me off. I know you'll be so extremely mad."

His demanding words made me nervous and anxious as fuck. I had bad feelings about this, really really bad. "Okay."

"After you ran away from Daniel and Kyle, I stilll asked them to look for you and bring you here. Result was they failed. But few weeks later, Kyle contacted me saying he saw you with a guy, yes that was Mark, in a park. I commanded him to search this guy's information and turned out surprisingly that he was a pop star. So, I tried the other way to get you here. I contacted his management and made a deal."

HOLY FUCK.

"The deal was I gave them an amount of money they demanded as long as you would suffer and just go back here. I thought that would be so easy since I also thought you were weak."

Really, in this ill condition, he still couldn't filter his words to their tiniest bits. Gosh, what was damn wrong with this man!?

"So, I added another role to help them. The help was James. He actually succeeded to separate you from Mark but experienced the failure when you successfully got away for Jakarta. I was impressed, really, by how you could do that. But then I thought the pop star helped you out so I asked James to look for you two and just drag you away. Beside that, the management also complained about the split of the band. So, if James failed, he was gonna be dead by my own hand. He accomplished his task by shooting your boy-- that was what he thought. But nah, he didn't. Beside that, the band is still splitting up nonetheless."

For fuck's sake, was he a psychopath or what!?

"And nah, I didn't kill James. He's still alive. Few months later, I heard news you were left by Mark. Then I wondered, why hadn't you come back home to me? I kept thinking everyday. I even contacted my family back, Beth was the first person I did. Finally, I came to realisation I was fucking wrong. Sorry for the swear but yes, I was so fucking out of my mind."

I didn't know if I believed this or not but now everything had made sense to me.

"You may not believe this for now, it's okay. I don't expect you to do. But I want you to know that I'm sorry. I realize everything and now I know karma does exist. Look at me, JJ, I'm ill and maybe I'm gonna be dead soon, no one knows."

JJ. I didn't get it from who or what he got that nickname. He had never noticed it. Well, what he noticed was alchohol only, right.

"Don't ever call me JJ."

"Sarah used to call you that, didn't she?"

"Yes but-"

"I know you're mad at me about everything. I don't blame you, I deserve to be mad at, to be blamed on. Go ahead. You can curse me all you want but please just believe that I'm sorry. I'm sorry for what I've done to you, to your childhood, to your love life, everything. I'm sorry about Sarah too. I loved her, I always do. I was just so fucking dumb and blind that time to just even remember that. I was a fucking mess. I was a fucking terrible husband to Sarah and father to you. But I regret everything now. I regret I did those fucking bad and fucking stupid things. I know you maybe won't ever forgive me for them all. That's fine. Really, I don't deserve to be forgiven ever. What I have done was just out of mind, totally fucking out of mi-"