Lost in Love | LingOrm (GxG)

34 - I Love You, I'm Sorry

Her quiet sobs seem to sound so loud and clear in my ears like bulletshots hitting deeply inside my heart.

With every silent step that I take, guilt is also growing immensely within me. I have seen P'Ling cry twice, and this is the third time. She hardly permits her tears to fall. She prefers to keep them inside until they blow up, just like now.

Biting my bottom lip as I come closer to her, I silently lay down in between the sheets, facing her back that is shaking so hard to muffle her cries. My arm reaches out to her, wanting to touch her waist but stopping midair when I see Ling clutching her phone playing my video. The way she caresses my face through the screen sends a bittersweet feeling inside me. She is still loving me deeply despite having a hard time because of me.

"P'Ling...Tee rak" I softly call her first before slipping my arms over her waist to embrace her closer. She stiffens in my touch as if trying to grasp if this is happening for real or not. When she finally turns her body around to see me, my heart drops when I gaze back at her forlorn sad eyes.

"Are you really here, Nong Orm?" Her soft fingertips slowly trace down the outline of my face as her lingering gaze leaves a tingling sensation in me. "I'm not dreaming, right?"

I immediately hug her tightly in my arms as my tears are streaming down uncontrollably. "I'm sorry for being so immature, P'Ling. I'm sorry..."

"How can you suddenly appear beside me?"

"Because I was still waiting for you, Tee rak."

/

I'm really sorry, Nong, I don't think I can make it, this shooting is taking more time than I expected. I know I've promised to come and my apology would not matter that much, but still, I'm deeply sorry. I love you

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Did you leave already, Nong? I'm sorry

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Nong, I'm gonna continue filming, alright? I'll wait for your response, I love you the most

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I know I'm wrong for not fulfilling my promise on your big day, Nong Orm. But please know my heart is still there with you and I hope you like the surprise gifts that I made for you

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I miss you, I'm sorry...

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I covered my face with both of my hands when I took in every single word that she wrote to me. My brain was still grasping the situation as I just woke up from a deep sleep.

Right after graduation, I went home straight away due to exhaustion. When I said 'home', it meant my lover's abode. I wanted to wait for her to come home.

I admitted that I was upset with her so I thought to reply to her first message later on after I showered. But as soon as my head touched the pillow, I was all gone already. I just realized her calls and the other four texts right now.

Sighing in frustration, I could feel my love's desperation through her texts. She must have thought I was ignoring her. Am I hurting her again?