Liar | Yeongyu

25. Shadows & Scars

Beomgyu was playing video games with Yeonjun at his house, well, at Taehyun's house but Beomgyu didn't know that. They were sitting in the living room while playing Mario Kart together.

"You're almost there baby go!" Yeonjun cheered.

"Eat my dust Beomgyu!" Taehyun yelled as he raced in first place on their last lap.

Beomgyu got three green shells and smirked as they approached the finish line. He shot them and hit Taehyun only seconds from crossing before he passed him.

"Hell yeah!" Yeonjun hugged him and kissed his cheek. "That was great!"

"Pure fucking luck!" Taehyun threw his controller. "I'm tired of losing." He walked away.

"Sore loser!" Yeonjun called and Taehyun slammed his door. "I think he just wanted to get away from us."

"Maybe because you keep kissing me."

His face inched closer to his. "You like it." He pressed their lips together and Beomgyu leaned into him. His hands placed gently on his shoulders as he kissed him back.

Yeonjun decided to take a little initiative. His hand cupped the side of his face, he ran his fingers through his long brown hair and leaned forward a little to make Beomgyu lay down which he did. He felt his tongue against his lip and parted his lips for him, their breathing got heavier and Beomgyu's hands tightened on his shirt. He pulled away for air and Yeonjun started to press kisses against his neck.

He bit his lip and his eyes rolled shut. "H-Hyung, wait a second."

"What's the matter?" He asked as he kept kissing him.

"I just need...I need a second." When Beomgyu felt his hand start to slip under his shirt he gasped and roughly pushed him away. "Stop it!"

Yeonjun sat there and stared at him. "I...I'm so sorry."

Beomgyu stood up and grabbed his things. "I should go."

"W-Wait baby, please? I'm really sorry I wasn't thinking I shouldn't have done that. Don't leave." He begged but Beomgyu put his shoes on.

"We'll talk later hyung." He walked outside and closed the door.

Yeonjun sighed as he pressed his forehead against the door and went to Taehyun's room.

"I fucked up."

"I heard." He murmured as he paused his tv. "What happened?"

"We were kissing and I took it too far. He freaked out, I think I scared him."

Taehyun tilted his head while he stared at him. "What's on your mind?" He asked.

He shook his head. "Nothing. I need to apologize to him. I feel like a total asshole, I got carried away. He's so cute and I really want wanna..." his voice faded as he looked at Taehyun. "I've never been with a guy before. Is it the same as a girl?"

"Nope, but I think you know that already. You're dating him, doesn't it feel different?"

"It does. A good different." He laid down on his bed. "I'm gonna give him an hour and then go see him. I don't wanna keep this floating around too long."

Taehyun nodded and unpaused his tv. Yeonjun had changed a lot since being with Beomgyu. Before, it was all about girls, clubs, sex, drinking, but he actually seemed to care about someone other than himself. It made him happy and he only wished for the best for the two of them.

After an hour had passed Yeonjun went to Beomgyu's place. He rang the doorbell and Ms. Ahn answered the door. She smiled and bowed as he did before letting him in.

"He's outside in the garden."

"Thank you." He walked in and went outside and saw him sitting with his sketchbook and drawing. "Beomgyu!"

He saw him look up and sigh as he closed his book. Yeonjun walked over.

"Can I sit?" Beomgyu nodded and he sat down. "I came to apologize again. I shouldn't have done that, I should've asked before but I got caught up in the moment and it's no excuse. I want you to be comfortable with me. I want you to trust me."

"I do trust you hyung." He brought his knees up with his chest and hugged his legs as he placed his forehead on his knees.

"Then...why do you do this? Right now, you're hiding yourself from me."

Beomgyu looked at him with tears in his eyes. "Hyung...I-I need to tell you something, but promise me you won't judge me."

"I promise." He held his hand. "I'm here."

"In...in high school there was this guy and I liked it him a lot hyung. Word got around and somehow he found out and he came to me, said I was pretty, said he liked me too." He wiped his tears. "He said everything he needed to say to get what he wanted from me, which was to...a-all he wanted was..." he looked away from him.

"I'm sorry Beomgyu."

"That's...that's all we ever did. When I wanted to do something else he would get angry, he used to say if I didn't, I didn't truly love him. He would threaten to kill himself if I didn't do what he wanted and I was young and naive and I did as he said. My parents found out because I would tell Ms. Ahn and she told them. They ruined his parents and they were forced to move but that didn't stop me from getting bullied at school. I was so hurt and angry...I felt so disgusting hyung." He covered his face and started to sob.

Yeonjun hugged him tightly. "It's okay, you don't have to keep talking about it baby. It's alright." He rubbed his back.

Beomgyu cried in his arms for a while before he finally calmed down. Talking about it with him was easier than he thought but thinking about it all over again and remembering how much he hated himself, reopened wounds that were never fully healed to begin with.

"Hyung." He said as he looked at him. "I'm sorry for acting weird–"

"No, don't apologize."

"I really like you a lot hyung I'm just so scared of showing you...of being vulnerable. What if...what if you find the rest of me unattractive?"

"I wouldn't." He smiled at him and touched his face. "Don't worry about that. I will only follow your lead from now on. Okay?"

Beomgyu smiled and nodded. "Thank you hyung." He snuggled up in his arms and sighed.

"Take your time but just know, you don't have to hide yourself. I love every part of you."

*･゜ﾟ･*:.｡..｡.:*･'(*ﾟ▽ﾟ*)'･*:.｡. .｡.:*･゜ﾟ･*

I saw a few comments about people wondering about Beomgyu's past and now you know 😀