ramblings

terms

I've been forced to come to terms

With everything

I've made a lot of decisions

And let some people go

I feel like I've grown

Not on the outside

But deep within me

I've come to terms with who I am

What I do

And don't believe

I've confessed something I hid from

A group of people

And appreciated their reactions

I've come to terms with my own humanity

And how I affect others

How a life can slip through your fingers

Like grains of sand

I've been forced to grow up

To take a bigger role

I've come to terms with the fact that

Who I want

Is lost from me forever

Lost after walking through a field of lies

Lies he passed out like candy

I've found people I can count on

To support me through it all

All the storms and chaos

The world finds to throw

I've come to terms with life

That it is a cruel thing

It tears away a person

And leaves them as a shadow of their old self

That age can weather the body

And leave the mind in shambles

Struggling to piece the simplest things together

I've come to terms with who I am

An individual still searching for what makes

A life fulfilled

A person still growing into the mindset of an adult

While trying to contain the dying embers of childhood

Trying to retain some childlike innocence

In a world that forces you to grow up prematurely

I've tried to remain positive

In a world full of demons

And discovered that your light

The light within

Is the only thing to destroy them

I've come to terms

That not everyone is how we seem

It's like we have covered over ourselves with paint

To hide from the inside

That we are surrounded by lies

Big and small

Lies can tear us apart

They can render us inert,

Like hermit crabs hiding in their shells

I've come to terms with the idea

That everyone we once considered to be a friend

Isn't really after all

I have learned people can create false personas

To become a fake person

That never really existed

I've come to terms with love

That it is a wonderful

Yet terrible thing

A broken heart is very painful

Not on the outside but within

I've come to terms with the person I am

Although I may be rough around the edges

I am still a work in progress

A person halfway to discovering

Their life as a whole

Still learning how to stand tall in the face of adversity

Still coming to terms with how to be

Herself