Reaper's Touch

Hex: Smoke

"Secrets, silent, stony sit in the dark palaces of both our hearts: secrets weary of their tyranny: tyrants willing to be dethroned."
–James Joyce, Ulysses

Hex found herself at the bridge during the velvety dark blue of another winter night. The bright moonlight spilled out between clusters of clouds, reflecting off patchy piles of pure white snow. It was pretty, prettier than it had ever been. Pretty in a way that seemed unnatural.

"Hey, Beautiful," said a voice from behind her.

She turned and saw Adam there. Hex sucked in a breath of the cold air as she realized that she was once again dreaming and there was no city, no road, no railroad tracks beyond the bridge. Just starry navy blue darkness all around, too beautiful to be real.

"I'm dreaming again?" she asked.

Adam nodded. "I brought you here because I wanted to talk to you."

"About what?"

"About what's going to happen."

"What does that mean?"

Adam took a few steps forward, then another few. He seemed to be weighing whether or not he should approach her. When he was close enough, he stopped and reached out his hand. Hex felt him press it against her belly. It was warm and solid, so real, each fingertip familiar.

"Can I see the baby?" he asked softly.

Hex closed her eyes as she placed her hand over his. "Adam, I can say this now, and I'm sorry I couldn't before, but our baby is dead. Daisy died before she was born. I'm really sorry. It's taken me a long time to even be able to think about her, but she's gone... and even though it still hurts, I have to accept it wasn't my fault."

Adam looked at her sadly. "It wasn't your fault, and I know Daisy is dead. She's in The Light. I see her sometimes waiting there for me, telling me to come, but I don't go. I won't go yet."

"If you know what happened to her, why did you bring her up?" Hex asked.

Adam smiled slowly. "I asked if I could see the baby. I didn't say our baby."

Hex woke up with a start, gasping for breath, her hands clutching her belly where Adam's hand had been. Gus, feeling her jump, woke up too. They were squished so close together on the little couch it was impossible to not feel each other's every movement.

"You okay?" Gus mumbled sleepily, his hand moving in a slow circle on her back.

Hex nodded wordlessly, still covering her belly with both hands. She laid back down and closed her eyes, pressing her nose against Gus's chest, where she felt safest.

"I'm fine," she whispered.

Gus had already fallen back to sleep, his hand resting on her spine. She watched him for a few minutes as his eyes moved back and forth behind his eyelids, dreaming. She took a shaky breath and kissed his forehead before closing her own eyes, determined to fall back to sleep, this time without dreaming about Adam.

——————

The next morning West had to leave earlier than usual so it fell to Ember to take Cricket to daycare. To get out of the house and find some privacy, Hex decided to go with them. It was Ember's day off and Hex would work the late shift tonight, so there wouldn't be a better time to do what she needed to do.

After they dropped Cricket off, Hex said,

"Okay, well the real reason I wanted to walk with you is... I need to buy something, and I can't do it with Gus around."