The room is already dark when I step out of the bathroom. Danny is curled up on his side of the bed, snoring lightly. I know he can't be sleeping already but I don't say anything.
I make my way to the bed, colliding with the suitcases that are placed next to the closet.
Everything is packed for our early flight in the morning.
Reluctantly I set the alarm for 5.30 and sigh as I pull the sheets over my body.
But I can't sleep. Can't forget the way Dan was looking at me, bent down on one knee, diamond ring in his hand.
Can't forget the way he looked at me when I hesitated, completely taken aback by what he did.
Can't forget the look in his eyes as I broke his heart just by uttering those two small words.
I can't.
It was the only thing I could have said. The only thought circling my brain as he knelt there in front of me.
I can't.
I couldn't explain it. And I doubt an explanation is what he wanted to hear.
So I left. I waited in the parking lot for him. For him to call the driver and tell him to pick us up.
I refused to look him in the eyes. Afraid of what I might see in them.
The minutes seemed like hours and when the driver finally arrived, when Dan opened the door for me I mumbled a silent thanks in return but he didn't say anything.
We arrived in our suite and I disappeared in the bathroom.
Heard how Danny took off his clothes and threw his shoes away.
Heard how he went to bed sighing heavily.
I had turned on the shower but my ear was pressed against the door.
I heard everything. The heartache. The disappointment. The regret.
Now I'm laying next to him and the space that's created in the middle is big enough for an adult to lay in-between.
And there's nothing I can do but count the hours until my alarm goes off in the morning so I can get up and pretend to be busy.
Just six more hours.
The next day in London...
I place the key inside the lock and slowly turn it.
Dreading the moment I'll be alone again.
Alone with my thoughts. Alone with my doubts.
Why did I have to break his heart? Why did I say I couldn't marry him?
Why can't I marry him?
I fumble in my purse and take out my phone. I have to talk to someone. And that someone is my sister.
I send her a quick text, letting her know I'm back. Asking if she has time to check in, have a coffee.
I try to sound as nonchalant as possible, I don't want her thinking anything is wrong.
Next I stuff all my clothes in the washer and store the empty suitcases away.
Luckily I had hired a cleaner who came in and kept the flat dust-free and watered the plants.
Suddenly a horrible thought crosses my mind. If I'm waiting here for Emily to come so I can spill out my guts to her who says Danny isn't in his flat right now doing the exact same thing?
A funny feeling washes over me. Surely he called his sister. And Mark. No doubt about that! He called Mark.
Mark never really liked me, no matter what Dan says. Mark can't stand me. If he hears that I turned down Dan's proposal he'll say I'm only with Dan because he's famous.
Oh Shit! The interview! It's tomorrow! One more reason for Mark to manifest his idea of me being an attention seeker.
A knock on the door startles me and with a heavy heart I walk towards it.
"Lou! You look amazing! I'm so glad you went on this vacation, you barely allow yourself time off. Tell me, how was it? I want to hear all the details."
