Red

Who Knew Robots Were A Party Pooper

Adelaide sat up on the upper level and watched Sam and Steve walk up the stairs.

"Your world is crazy." Sam said as they walked up next to Adelaide.

"Be it ever so humble." Steve said. He offered Adelaide a beer that he grabbed for her. He knew it wouldn't affect her but he still thought he'd offer.

"You find a place in Brooklyn yet?" Sam asked.

"I don't think I can afford a place in Brooklyn." Steve sighed.

"That's why I stay here. It's free." Adelaide told them.

"Until you have to get food." Steve shook his head. "Tell him what you did to Thor." Steve pointed to Sam, almost to say he needed to know.

"I didn't do anything to him." She held her hands up in defense.

They all three stood together and looked down at the growing party. Adelaide enjoyed this party more than the last one she was at.

"Any leads on our missing person?" Steve asked his crew.

Adelaide rolled her eyes. Of course once they were all together that's what he asked first. "Nothing."

"All dead ends." Sam told them.

Adelaide took a long drink of her beer, ignoring the conversation. She spent so much time lying to them that she felt if she kept talking about it she would break and tell them everything that happened last year.

As the night grew on and the party died down, all the Avengers sat around a table, letting the night pass them by.

"But it's a trick." Clint pointed out.

"No, no, it's much more than that." Thor corrected him.

"Ah, whosoever be he worthy shall haveth the power." Clint mocked. "Whatever, man! It's a trick." He said pointing at the hammer.

Thor laughed. "Please, be my guest." He offered.

Everyone laughed and egged him on as Clint stood up. They all made snarky comments and quips as he stood over the hammer.

"You know I've seen this before, right?" He grabbed the handle and pulled as hard as he could. "I still don't know how you do it!" Clint laughed and let go.

"Smell the silent judgement?" Stark asked.

"Please, Stark, by all means." Clint waved his hand at him.

Tony stood up and unbuttoned his jacket, ignoring all the others. "Never one to shrink from an honest challenge. It's physics." He put his hand through the leather grip and grabbed the handle. "Right, so, if I lift it, then I rule Asgard? I will be reinstituting prima nocta." Tony said.

He let go and walked off, telling them he'd be back.

Now he tried with part of his suit on. He put on the thrusters and still struggled to move the hammer. He recruited Rhodes in his mission.

"Are you even pulling?" Rhodey asked.

"Are you on my team?" Stark asked.

"Just represent. Pull."

Banner got his chance. He pulled on the hammer, lifted with all he had but his hands slipped away. He backed away and held his arms up, still crying out in a fake rage.

"Go ahead, Steve. No pressure." Steve got up and rolled up his sleeve. They all watched as Steve tugged on the hammer.

Adelaide saw Thor's face fall when they all heard a screech. Steve tried again but the hammer didn't move.

All the boys looked over at Adelaide and Natasha.

"Oh, no, no. That's not a question I need answered." Natasha sat back.

Adelaide shrugged and shook her head. She walked over to the hammer. Even if she knew she couldn't lift it, what's the harm in entertaining. She pulled on the handle as hard as she could. "Nothing." She threw her hands up. "I just can't bear to steal your thunder." She patted Thor on the shoulder as she took her seat again.

"All deference to the Man Who Wouldn't Be King, but it's rigged." Tony said.

"Bet your ass." Clint told him.

"Steve, he said a bad language word." Maria pointed to Clint.

"Did you tell everyone about that?" Steve looked over at Tony. Tony pointed to Adelaide who looked at Clint with accusation on her face.

"The handle's imprinted, right? Like a security code." Tony asked. "Whosoever is carrying Thor's fingerprints" is I think the literal translation."

"Yes. It's very interesting theory. I have a simpler one." He grabbed the hammer off the table like it was another tool in the shed. "You're all not worthy." He flipped it in the air.

They all protested until a high-pitched noise rang through the tower.

"Worthy." A voice came from the door. They all turned to see what was happening.

Adelaide saw the figure standing in the dark. Just when they were all having a quiet and fun night, something had to step in and break their bonding.

"No. How could you be worthy?" It was a robotic figure that resemble a bot from the Iron Legion. "You're all killers." It waved a lazy hand at them all.

"Stark."

"Jarvis."

"I'm sorry, I was asleep. Or I was a-dream." The robot kept talking.

"Reboot Legionnaire OS. We got a buggy suit." Stark told Jarvis.

"There was this terrible noise. And I was tangled in... In... Strings. I had to kill the other guy. He was a good guy."

"You killed someone?" Steve demanded.

"Wouldn't have been my first call. But, down in the real world, we're faced with ugly choices." The robot continued.

"Who sent you?" Thor asked.

"I see a suit of armor around the world." Stark's voice rang from somewhere inside the robot.

"Ultron." Bruce looked at Tony.

"In the flesh. Or, not, not yet. No this chrysalis. But I'm ready. I'm on a mission." Ultron said.

"What mission?" Natasha asked.

"Peace in our time."

The Iron Legion flew out and attacked them. Steve kicked up the table, shielding them from being attacked.

Adelaide grabbed onto the foot of one and pulled it back. She pulled against the thrusters and Steve ripped the other leg off.

"That was dramatic. I'm sorry, I know you mean well. You just didn't think it through. You want to protect the world but you don't want it to change. How is humanity saved if it's not allowed to evolve?" He grabbed a nearby robot. "With these? These puppets. There's only one path to peace. The Avengers extinction."

Thor threw his hammer and destroyed Ultron. At least his physical form.