When time froze

chapter 37

I laid my back against the wall then put my knees to my chest. water came pouring out of my eyes as I wrapped my hands around my knees and looked down and cried. I just cried. for hours. my face was soaking wet with water and I just cried and cried. the fog cleared and I could see the out side. about a half an hour later, I stopped crying and got up onto my feet then slowly walked to the glass door. looking at the ground, I put my hand on the handle, and pushed the door opened. I walked outside and didn't look up from the ground. I walked down the street and past them, then down another street till I finally got back to the truck. I looked up, tears still filling my eyes. I walked over to the door and looked at it. I stared at it for a while then turned around and went straight to the truck. I climbed inside and saw that Ethan left the car keys inside the front. I instantly stopped thinking of him and just climbed into the truck. I wiped away the water on my cheeks and started to drive away. I couldn't stay in the same place that those two were killed. I drove down some streets then finally got out of the city. I drove away and to the middle of no where and didn't look back. 

----------------------3 weeks later------------------

Its been 3 weeks since I was last in the city. I have been to a lot of little towns and now I am in a town that is in a different state. I have been very depressed and I have started cutting. I tried to kill myself twice but it didn't work out. I tried hanging myself but the rope ripped. I tried shooting myself but I lost all my bullets killing animals for food. every time I find some kind of alcoholic drink, I drink it until there is not one more drop left in the bottle, or until I just past out. I am walking down an empty street right now. I feel so alone. I have no one to talk to, so I started talking to myself about the weather or something. I walk up to my house that I chose, and walk to the couch. I sit down then pull out my knife and rip it across my arm. I do this 3 times over old cuts then I through the knife next to me. I stand up while blood drips down my arms over dried blood I never washed off. I am frankly to sad to do anything else. I walk to the fridge and open the door then take out a bud light I found at a grocery store they have here. I pull it out then open it and start to chug it down while walking back to the couch after grabbing some potato chips. I sit on the couch and put the drink down then start to eat some chips. beer and chips have been my food supply for the past 2 weeks.  

I lay my head back onto the couch and stare at the ceiling then I close my eyes. I fell asleep and everything went black. I woke up then sat up and had a major headache. "damn" I said, holding my hand to my head.

I groaned then stood up. I walked to the kitchen and I couldn't find anymore potato chips. I sighed then went to my bag that was on the coffee table. I opened it and ran my hand through it until I found something catch onto my finger. I lifted my hand up from the bag and saw that it was the locket that Leslie gave me. Tears started coming out of my eyes then sadness turned into anger.

I through the necklace onto the ground and pushed my purse to the ground. I pause for a second then took the TV remote and through it at the TV, making it shatter. I took my empty beer bottle and through that across the room. I took the edge of the coffee table and through that onto its side, making every thing fall over and break. I took the pillows off of the couch and through them around the living room. I ran to the kitchen and used my arm to swipe all the stuff I had on the dinning room table, onto the ground. I was angry and sad for some reason. I guess the locket reminded me of everyone. I went to one of the kitchen drawers, pulled out the silverware then got the knifes out. I grabbed a hand full and threw one of them at the wall. then another out the window, then one at the front door. I threw them all at once then tears started running down my cheeks. my eyes filled with water and my vision was kind of blurry. I pushed my back up against the counter and slid down to the floor. I put my knees to my chest and wrapped my arms around them then burst into tears. I cried for a while. after I was done crying I stood up, wiping away tears, then walked to the living room. I grabbed my stuff then walked out, leaving the locket in the house. I looked down at the ground then walked to the street and walked down the street to a car. I got into the car and drove around. I drove down the street while looking out the passenger window to see if I could see anything. I turned my head back to the front of the car and looked through the window. I saw something laying in the street that was bloody. I instantly stopped on the brakes and flung forward. I put the car in park, then got out. I slowly walked towards the thing on the street. it was ripped up and covered in blood, like it got attacked by an animal. its cloths were torn up and pieces of its skin was on the ground.

I slowly walked over to it and it was laying on its side so I saw its back. I slowly walked around it to see its face. my heart broke. shattered into a million pieces. tears flowed out of my eyes like a waterfall. I couldn't breath I was crying so hard. Carl laid there like a dog that just fell asleep. he stayed still and didn't breath. his face was drowned in blood as it came out of his mouth and eyes. the blood was dried. I fell to the ground while still crying, and laid onto my back while repeating "no, no, no, no, no, why does this have to happen?" in a teary voice.

I rolled to my side while still crying. I laid there for a long time. I thought of just staying there. I gasped little breaths as my crying went down. I looked down the road then got up slowly, and limped while looking away, to the car. I got inside and turned the car on, then drove around him. I just looked straight and didn't think of him. if I did, I would burst into more tears. I drove for another 40 miles until I got to another town that was close to the other one. I drove into it then found another house and walked inside of it. I sat on the couch and sighed and looked up at the clock that didn't move that was over the TV and on the wall. I turned to my bag that was right next to me I reached for it and then looked for my knife. I had another one in my bag. I found it then took it out and slit it across my wrist as blood came down my arm. tears came from my eyes and I started crying again. "damn it" I said as I wiped away tears. I took a pillow and stuffed my head inside of it. I cried into the pillow as I made it soaking wet. I did this for a few minutes until I heard a sound. a sound of ticking. I stopped crying and lifted my head up while wiping away tears. I looked around then I looked up onto the wall. I looked at the clock and then saw that the big hand was moving. It ticked and moved around. I looked at it in confusion then slowly started to stand up and move close to it. it made the tick-tock sound that clocks do. a smile then grew on my face once I knew.

once I knew that time was thawing.

-------------------------the end--------------------

you may hate me for the ending of this book cause it was kind of a cliff hanger but still, thank you for reading this book. I hoped you liked it and thanks for baring with me on this. I hope you vote on this and I want you to read my other books like 'one last year'. with that book I am going to write all the chapter at one time then publish them all at once. it makes life a little easier. thank you and I hope you vote. night love <3