A Darker Love

Chapter Thirty- Painful Silences

I went with Isaac to the hospital and held his good hand in the ambulance because I was trying to be a supportive friend, and I just broke his hand so it was the least I could do. It was like the realization hadn't sunk in yet, he just kept apologizing to me and saying that he was so sorry for running after me and making a big fuss about his hand. I stared at him like he was crazy, I'd just broke his hand and he was apologizing to me? He got wheeled into surgery straight away when we arrived at the hospital, I couldn't go in with him but I kisses his hand for good luck and waited outside for him.

It turned out that his hand was shattered and it would never been the same as it once had been which made me feel even more guilty.

"How you feeling?" I went in straight away after his surgery, he looked really pale but tried to smile at me when he saw my face.

"Never better." He choked out. "Yourself?"

I smiled a little, sadly. "You've just went in and had surgery and your asking me how I'm doing?" I shook my head at him.

"Well, you are looking a bit peaky." He felt my head with his good hand, joking around.

I pushed it away then suddenly started feeling tears flooding my eyes. "I'm so sorry, Isaac! This is all my fault, if I hadn't ran away from you then you would be able to play football again."

He wiped the tears off my cheeks and smiled at me. "Hey, hey it's okay. I'll be playing it again in no time, plus this cast makes a great goalie glove."

I sobbed harder, leaning on his bed. "Stop being so nice about it! I broke your fucking hand!"

"Do you want me to say I hate you? Cause I don't, I meant every word I said to you." He looked up at me. "I love you Sam, I always have and I don't care you you break every bone in my body, just please don't break my heart."

We kissed then. It was different from kissing Caleb, more timid and soft but I kind of liked it. I pulled away and turned away from him after a few seconds.

"I can't, I'm sorry."

"It's okay." He rubbed my arm softly with his cast, it felt good but wrong at the same time.

"Isaac, you can't say stuff like that to me and make me feel that way..."

"Why not? I mean every word."

"Caleb..."

"What about Caleb? I don't care if he likes your or not, I love you and..."

I cut him off, I had to tell him. "He's my boyfriend."

Silence, it stabbed me like a knife.

"I'm sorry." Why did I say that? I wasn't sorry... Was I?

I walked out of the room, I couldn't face him and then ran straight into Caleb's open arms.

"Hey, what happened?"

I explained everything to him and leaving out the parts that included Isaac's display of affection.

"So, you were going in the lift when he stuck his hand? Why did he do that?" Caleb's eyes narrowed like he was scanning for left out pieces of information in my eyes.

I breathed out. "Okay, something else happened..."

"What?" He looked concerned. "Did he try and do something to you again?"

"He told me that he loved me..." I looked away.

"What?!"

"And... we kissed."

Another silence, it pained me even more than the one with Isaac.

"I see." His eyes glossed over, icy cold and full of anger.

"I'm sorry." I trembled slightly at his face, it looked like he could snap at any moment.

"And you have feelings for him?"

"No!" I looked at him seriously. "I lov- I mean like you, I like you."

He continued to look at the ground, his icy glare so white hot it could melt through the floor and it made me feel even worse.

I got up and limped away from him, trying not to cry when he pulled me back by my arm and kissed me. It was the kind of kiss that sent ripples of heat through my body and electricity through my spine. I wrapped my arm around his neck as he pinned me against the wall. I moaned softly and gasped for air as his lips softly kissed down to my neck, he pulled me closer by the waist and gently stroked my hair. I closed my eyes as we stopped and leaned breathless against the wall.

"I love you."

I looked at him, a grin flooded my face. "I love you too."

We kissed again, it was full of passion and fire. Then he kissed my hand that was held in his like it was his own lucky penny.

"Your mine." He paused slightly, his face still hard. "And you can tell him that." He walked away, leaving me breathless and confused.

I looked back towards Isaac's room and sighed, slowly tearing my eyes away from it and trying to run after Caleb.

Caleb drove me home and walked me to the door, he kissing me goodbye on the cheek. In the car journey home the tension eased up and melted away like Isaac had never happened. He leaned close to my ear and grinned.

"I'll see you later." He winked and waved while walking down the path as I stumbled in the door, seeing an angry looking Dad waiting for me.

"Hi Dad." I tried to grin at him but it quickly faded away.

"I don't know how you do it Sam, but you always seem to find away to get out of school." He shook his head, sighing.

"I know, I'm sorry Dad... But I had to go with him to the hospital, it was all my fault..." I looked down at the ground.

He walked over and pulled me in for a hug, suddenly not angry anymore. "It's okay kiddo, don't blame yourself."

"But it is my fault Dad, he was running after me."

"Why was he running after after you?" He pulled away, puzzled.

I sighed, I had to tell him sometime. "He told me that he... he said he loved me."

Another silence as he turned a weird colour, I guess hearing your daughter saying that someone loves her nails your tongue to the back to your throat.

"Oh..."

"But I don't like him that way, I just wanted to be friends."

"Right, well..." He stuttered.

"And I've already got a boyfriend, Caleb."

He sighed. "Well, you should tell him that."

"What?" I looked at him, astonished. "I just told you I have a boyfriend Dad."

"I know," He sighed. "I kind of expected it from the way you two were looking at each other at dinner."

"Oh..." It was my turn to be shocked.

"Yeah and I'm not okay with it just so you know. But I won't stop you."

"Umm thanks."

We stood there awkwardly for a moment, it was one of the weirdest times of my life. Anyone who has even had this talk with there Dad would know that boyfriends and Dads don't mix.