Rain in Our Hearts

I'm Sorry

Chapter 8: I’m Sorry

“Oppa, I said I was sorry! I’m fine, aren’t I? It’s not like I’m hurt,” I whined, feeling sad. Seung Hyun was upset that I walked all the way home alone, and didn’t even call him for a ride.

He replied gently, “That’s not the point, one day you could get hurt, and what could I do? I wouldn’t even know.” He sighed and stretched out on the couch. I curled up next to him.

“Nothing could happen, it’s not like people just pull knives out on me. You don’t need to worry,” I told him, hugging him. He shook his head.

“But they could! I don’t know why they would, but people get angry. Especially when you’re just an ordinary girl,” he said. I sighed and stood up, and walked into the bedroom. Time for a nap.

“What are you doing?” he asked me, I think I heard a hint of guilt in his voice.

Carefully, I told him, “I’m going to get some sleep, I’m tired.” He left me alone, and I climbed under the warm blankets, getting comfortable. I really wasn’t tired, I just wanted to cry. I tried not to, but it was too hard, so I just gave in. It was so hard to stay quiet, and I’m not even sure why I was crying in the first place. I understood where he was coming from, I guess I just felt like he was mad at me. Sure, we had fights, but not very often. This was our first argument in a few months. But then again, every time we fought, I felt like this, he was just never around when I cried. Now, he was. He’d never seen me cry before, unless it was happy tears, and I didn’t want him seeing me sad now. He promised I’d never be sad in his presence. I stopped crying, and tried to fall asleep. I couldn’t after an hour, so I got up to have a shower instead. I went into the closet and grabbed some clothes, found a towel, and went towards the bathroom.

“Did you have a good sleep, Yoona?” Seung Hyun’s voice called from the kitchen. He came into the hall, looking at me. I shrugged.

“It was okay,” I mumbled. “I’m taking a shower, okay?” He nodded, and I continued into the bathroom to my shower. I made sure the water was hot, but not so hot that I couldn’t stand it. I hated warm water, I preferred hot to anything, unless I was swimming. I was a pretty good swimmer, I’d even been in a few races in high school.

When I came out of the shower, I smelled something really good. My mouth watered and my stomach growled.

“What are you making? It smells good,” I asked him, walking into the kitchen.

“Sam Gyup Sal,” he replied. ** sam gyup sal is a Korean dish featuring thin-cut pork belly, with some garlic slices, jalapeno pepper slices, and sometimes bean sprouts andkimchi.  With a piece of leafy green lettuce in your palm, you pluck a piece of meat from the grill, dip it into a little bowl containing toasted sesame oil and salt and place this on top of the lettuce.

I told him, “Well, it smells good!” I smiled at him, and he turned to me.

“Did you lie to me when you said you had a good sleep?” he inquired, seriously.

“No,” I replied, but even I heard the lie in my voice. “Why would I lie, oppa?”

Simply, he said, “Because maybe you were upset and didn’t want to talk about it. I’m your husband, you can talk to me, and if you don’t tell me what’s wrong, it hurts me. So tell me next time, alright? I don’t like feeling like I’m making you sad.” I just nodded, and hugged him. I felt better now, anyways. It was completely normal to fight sometimes, and I don’t know why I was trying to run away from the truth of that.