Chapter Fourteen
Cheryl looked at herself in the mirror one last time, smoothing her tight black dress down as she looked over her reflection.
How long had it been since she dressed up? How long had it been since she actually looked forward to going out?
She tried hard not to think of the answers to the questions that were swirling around in her head as she grabbed her bag from off the side and locked the hotel door.
She almost stopped completely in her tracks down the staircase as her eyes settled on Kimberley, who was sat on one of the chairs in the foyer.
“Kimberley” she said as she made her way to the bottom of the stairs, her name coming out of Cheryl’s lips almost like a question.
“you look lovely” Kimberley replied as she got out of her seat and walked over to Cheryl. The younger girl felt herself blush at Kimberley’s comment and hoped it wasn’t too noticeable.
She wanted to say it back, but something stopped her. They had somehow managed to scrape together a fraction of their friendship, and Cheryl didn’t want to throw it away by overstepping the mark.
“what’s wrong?” Cheryl asked, a frown beginning to form on her face. For a second she had thought that maybe Nicola had invited Kimberley out for dinner with the two of them, although judging by what Kimberley was wearing she doubted so.
Kimberley opened her mouth to speak, but something inside told her not to say what it was she was going to say. She stalled for a while, searching Cheryl’s face for any hint that she should continue.
“nothing” she mumbled after what seemed like a long moment.
“were you waiting for me?” Cheryl asked, pointing towards the chair that Kimberley had been sat on.
“no…I was just going to go for a walk” she lied, and cursed herself inwardly for not coming up with a better excuse for why she was sat in the foyer.
“on your own?” Cheryl asked, a little bit of concern creeping in to her voice.
“it looks like it” Kimberley replied with a sad smile before shrugging her shoulders.
“you can come to dinner with me and Nic if you want” Cheryl offered, and hoped Nicola wouldn’t mind her inviting anybody else.
Kimberley shook her head emphatically, “no, no...I’ve got loads of stuff to do”
“you sure?” Cheryl offered one last time. Kimberley nodded and gave her best reassuring smile which seemed to placate Cheryl who looked at her watch before rolling her eyes.
“I better get going then” Cheryl said before reluctantly crossing the foyer towards the doors.
Kimberley watched her from where she was stood as she got in to the awaiting car outside the hotel.
She carried on watching long after the car had pulled away and had driven out of sight until eventually she realised she was stood alone in the middle of the hotel foyer.
-
She stared down at the blank piece of paper and picked up the pen, willing it to write itself. She had so much she wanted to say, so much that she really needed to say, but every time she tried, fear stopped her from carrying on.
The letter was supposed to be the easy option, yet one look around her to the waste paper bin filled with scrunched up paper reminded her that perhaps there was no easy option.
She tried again;
Cheryl…
And that was as far as she got, in fact that was as far as she had ever gotten in the two hours that she had been sat down at the table in her hotel room.
She poured herself another glass of wine and hoped that somewhere in the bottle, she would find the courage to write what it was that she wanted to say.
The silence still scared her. She would have thought that by now, she would be used to it, she had had a year of it after all. It wasn’t so much that she had no body to talk to, it was just that the one person she wanted to talk to wasn’t there.
The suitcase was screaming out to her in the corner, she tried her best not to look at it. She couldn’t run away anymore, the first time was hard enough, if she did it again, she would never come back. It was a tempting thought, but deep down she knew that running away from her problems wouldn’t solve them.
The clock on the bedside table read 11PM, too late to call any of the other girls, but to early for her to go to bed. She needed to write the letter if it was the last thing that she done, so once again she picked up the pen and toyed with it in her hand.
Cheryl….
