Chapter Four
She stepped off the plane and out in to the LA sun. Her sunglasses went straight on as she seen a few photographers up ahead, obviously they had got wind of the impending reunion.
Somebody ushered her in to the VIP area of the airport whilst her bags were collected. She sighed to herself as she sat down, knowing that things would only get even more complicated from here.
-
The hotel was stunning, and if she was there for any other reason, she might even have been impressed by its grandeur. Nadine had recommended it and she could see why, it really was something special.
How long could she stay in here before she would have to face the outside world? She hadn’t seen Nadine for a long time now, although they had spoken a lot on the phone. Her excitement at seeing the other three girls was mixed with trepidation about seeing Kimberley for the first time since that night.
She remembered everything about that night, after all she had lived it over and over again, every single day for the whole year. She could remember what Kimberley was wearing, what she smelt like, the look on her face as the word that Cheryl had said to her sunk in.
The tears…
She remembered the tears more than anything. How many times had she seen Kimberley’s tear stained face in her dreams? A constant little reminder of how much she had hurt her.
But her own tears served as a reminder to how much she was hurting as well. Not a night went by that her pillow wasn’t wet with tears. She lived her life on the idea that time was a healer, but maybe there just wasn’t enough time in the world to heal this wound.
A knock at the door pulled her out of her depressing thoughts. She looked through the spy hole and smiled when she saw Nicola on the other side.
She closed her eyes at the feel of the girl’s arms around her, it had been so long since she had seen her friend that she had almost forgotten what it felt like to hug her. They spent a good half an hour sitting talking about what they had been up to in the last few months before Nicola decided to drop her bombshell.
“have you seen Kimberley yet?”
“not yet” Cheryl said taking a deep breath, as if she was preparing herself for the conversation.
“I think she’s checking in, in the next couple of hours” Nicola replied as casually as she could. Her eyes rested on Cheryl’s gauging how she reacted to what she had said.
“she’s staying here?” Cheryl asked, her face showing how much of a shock it had come to her.
She felt her heart starting to beat faster at the realisation that in just a few hours, Kimberley would be in the same building as her. Nicola nodded her head with a sympathetic face.
“just talk to her” Nicola said after a few minutes, seeing the worry set on Cheryl’s face.
Cheryl got up from the bed that they were perched on and walked over to the window. She opened it wide, hoping that there would be a breeze in the air to take the sickly feeling away.
“does she ever ask about me?” Cheryl asked, turning her back to the window and leaning on the frame. She wasn’t really sure which answer she would have preferred, although in her heart she hoped that Kimberley at least thought about her from time to time.
“would it make you feel better if I said yes?” Nicola asked, crossing her legs on the bed, getting ready for what she thought might be a long conversation.
“I can’t feel any worse” Cheryl replied with a shrug of her shoulders.
“she asked whether you were coming today” Nicola replied, her face searching Cheryl’s for any signs that she was unhappy.
“that’s it?” Cheryl exclaimed with an exasperated laugh, although there was no humour in it. “in a year, that’s all she wanted to know about me” Cheryl went on, although this time it was more to herself than her friend sat on the bed.
“I don’t understand you Cheryl” Nicola replied sadly. It wasn’t said in malice or haste, it was a simple statement of fact, which was why Cheryl took the words so harshly.
“what do you mean?” she asked the younger girl with a frown, although she tried her best to keep her face open and friendly. The last thing she wanted to do was have an argument with Nicola when she hadn’t seen her for so long.
“I mean…” Nicola started, and then stopped to construct the sentence in her head first. “you never ask about her either. Maybe she doesn’t ask because it’s too hard for her” Nicola offered.
“maybe” Cheryl conceded, although the thought didn’t appease her much.
“are you ever going to tell me what happened?” Nicola asked quietly, knowing that she wasn’t likely to get the answer.
Cheryl shrugged her shoulders deeply. Of course she wanted to tell her, but what could she say?
“I just…it’s too hard” she replied after a few seconds, fighting the urge to cry in front of the girl.
-
Cheryl looked at her watch anxiously. Nicola had gone back to her hotel room, which turned out to be on the next floor up to Cheryl’s. She had no idea that they would all be staying in the same hotel barring Nadine who had set up over in LA permanently.
It wouldn’t be long until Kimberley and Sarah arrived. Nicola had told Cheryl that although she hadn’t seen much of Kimberley, Sarah kept in regular contact with her and they were flying in together.
She smiled politely when she had heard, but inside she couldn’t help but feel a bit envious that Sarah had managed to hold on to Kimberley’s friendship when she had failed miserably.
Only her and Kimberley knew truthfully what went on that night, only Kimberley had to hear her best friend telling her that she wished she had never met her. That was a pain that Kimberley probably suffered in silence, as did Cheryl.
She walked over to her carry bag and pulled out the shoe box with the shells in. She didn’t know why she brought it, but it felt as though it needed to come with her, to make the journey with her to see the person who had been responsible for them being in her possession anyway.
She ran her hand over them again, as she always did in the times when she missed Kimberley so much that it felt like her heart might actually burst. Having them in her hand was her way of imagining that the girl was closer to her.
Her phone went off in her pocket which made her jump a little. She grabbed it and read the text off Nadine. A car would pick her up at 8 and take her to Nadine’s house where they would have a few drinks and a catch up.
She laughed outwardly as she read the word ‘catch-up’ as if it was just a normal thing for them to do. Her stomach had almost tied itself in knots at the thought of this little catch-up, and as yet, she couldn’t even answer to herself why she was there in the first place.
But of course, she knew why really.
It was time.
It was time for her heart to stop aching for the one thing it couldn’t have.
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