In my head

Chapter 14

Everyone thinks I'm crying over Jake. They are saying comforting words, that he isn't worth it, I've got to move on.

I haven't said a word. I keep crying, I can't stop. They flow down my cheeks, without me even blinking. My year advisor has asked me what's wrong but I refuse to talk. I decide to speak.

"Can I please use the bathroom" I ask with my hand slightly raised in the air. Everyone turns their heads towards me. The teacher nods and I head for the door.

When I reach the shelter that covers the netball courts, I fall to my knees. My head falls into my hands, I sit there, loud cries escaping my mouth. I feel two large hands engulf me in a hug. The hands turn me around in their arms. I bury my head into his chest. Smelling his shirt, I know it's Jake. At the moment I don't care. I just need him. He slowly rubs circles on my back.

"What's wrong?" he asks.

"She's gone, Jake." I whisper. "The lest thing I ever said to her was I hate you. I had a fight with her before I left for school. I never said 'I love you' enough. She's gone. Why did she have to get knocked off? Why her? Why my mum?"

JAKES POV

"Why my mum?" She asked. "She was still young. She still has a life to live. What am I going to tell Jack? Dad's a mess. Jack is too young. I'm too young. I need her. I need her to be here with me. I'm supposed to buy my formal dress with her. She has to be there for when I get married. She has to make my cake. I have to choose my dress with her. She'll never get to see her grandchildren. My kids won't ever get to meet my mother." I've now realised that her mum has passed away. I don't know what to say, so I keep her in a tight hug. I'm not going to let her go, not now. "Jake, why?" Charlotte asks. I'm sure what she's asking.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"Why did she get taken away?" She chokes. "They always say the good go first. I'm so, so, so sorry Charlotte. She was a great woman. I don't know why they took her away so early. Maybe it was her time. I'm sorry, for everything." I say in her ear. Goosebumps appear down her arms. She nods.

"What happened between us?" she asks. The question I've been waiting for.

"I don't know, Char. I don't know why I kissed that girl. I'm so stupid. And when you saw me kissing the girl in the hallway, that happened because I was trying to get my mind off you. I haven't kissed a girl since then. Nothing will be better then kissing you. I miss you Charlotte. I miss your accent, your texts, your laugh, your smile, your kisses, your hugs. I just miss you." I answer.

"I miss you too." She says looking up at me through her long eyelashes. "But if you ever want me back, I will be waiting. You have to fight for me. Show me that I'm worth fighting for. If you don't come after me, I understand. Actually I won't understand, but it's ok, I'll be ok." My heart swells at her words. "You've got to prove it." She finishes.

I lean in and press my lips against hers. Her lips are softer than I remember. Charlotte's fast to respond, as she kisses me back. Sitting there the kiss is soft, and I can feel the sparks going off between us. God, how I missed this. I pull apart and help her to her feet.

"Please" she whispered. I nodded my head and she slowly walked away. I knew that was going to be my last kiss with her until I proved to her she was worth it. I had to get her back. I need her. I didn't know how to react to her mother passing. I was scared if she didn't let me touch her.

*

Its been a week since I spoke to Charlotte. I've been planning away to get her back.....but I'm failing. I can't just throw balloons in the air, have a banner, saying 'take me back'. I got propose, way to young. I can't write her name in the sky.

I don't know what to do.

I decided to talk to Joy.

"OK, I know you hate me at the moment." I start. She scoffs and crosses her arms waiting for me to continue. "Anyway, I need a way to get Charlotte back. She said have to prove she's worth it." I say.

Joy shakes her head multiple times before speaking. "I'm not helping you. This is for you to fix." she turns on her heels and walks away. Now I'm left to think of something.