ULTIMATE Doctor Who Book of Randomness (COMPLETED)

Series 8 Episode 8: Mummy On The Orient Express (Part 2)

P.O.V: The Doctor

After getting filled in on the incident Clara and I headed out into the corridor.

"There's a body and there's a mummy. I mean, can you not just get on a train? Did a wizard put a curse on you about mini-breaks?" Clara sighed, exasperated.

"It might be nothing. Old ladies die all the time. It's practically their job description." I said plainly.

"And the monster?" She asked expectantly, looking up at me.

"Well, seen by no one except her, which suggests that it wasn't there. A dying brain, lack of oxygen, hallucinations. Anyway, people do just die sometimes. She was over a hundred years old." I hoped this wasn't anything big. I really didn't want it to be something I needed to handle.

"Says the two thousand year old man." Clara smirked.

"Clara, you actually sound as if you want this to be a thing. Do you?" I awaited her response. I had a feeling she did.

"No. No, look, fine. You know, if you think that there is nothing to worry about, then that is fine by me." She sipped her champagne and looked out the window. She was totally lying.

"Are you sure?" I asked, just in case she'd open up.

"Ah, yes, I'm sure." We continued to stare out the windows. I turned to her and lifted my glass.

"To our last hurrah." I said.

"Our last, yeah. I mean, it's not like I'm never going to see you again."

"Isn't it?"

"Is it?"

"I thought that's what you wanted?"

She laughed shakily and turned to look at me. "No, what I mean, you're going to come round for dinner or something, aren't you? Do you, do you do that? Do you come round to people's houses for dinner?"

Her big eyes looked up at me expectantly. She wanted me to say yes.

"Of course. Why wouldn't I do that?" I lied. There were a million reasons.

"I don't know. I thought you might find it boring." She sighed again and looked back towards the window.

"Is it boring?"

"No." She turned around and raised her champagne flute. "To the last hurrah."

"The last hurrah."

******************************

Later that night, I was in my sleeping compartment lying on the plush bed, flexing my fingers as I thought aloud.

"It's nothing. Nothing. Definitely. Sure. Ninety nine percent sure. Really? Ninety nine percent? That's quite high. Is that the figure you're sticking with? Okay, okay. Seventy five. Well, that's jumped quite a bit. You've just lost twenty four percent. Because you know what this sounds like, don't you? No, do tell me. A mummy that only the victim can see. I was being rhetorical. I know exactly what this sounds like."

I hopped off my bed, pulled on my jacket and headed out into the corridor. I walked past Clara's room, and lifted my hand to the door, about to knock. I thought otherwise and continued on my way.

I made my way to the engineer's carriage, where I found a workbench with computer screens above it, racks of tools, and an odd piece of equipment bubbling, powering up it looked like. I gently removed the plastic wrapper and scanned it with my sonic screwdriver.

"Beautiful bit of kit, isn't it, sir? The Excelsior Life Extender. It's like driving around in a portable hospital."

I spun around to find the Chief Engineer standing behind me, holding a heavy looking piece of metal.

"Yes, well, it didn't do Mrs Pitt much good, did it?" I told him, silently judging everything. Yes, everything around me. Was this Chief Engineer to be trusted?

"Got me there, sir. Certainly got me there. Maybe it malfunctioned."

"Oh, I don't think so. The records show that the machine did everything it could to keep her alive." What was this whole operation up to?

He sighed. "Yeah. And almost drained the battery doing it." Battery? That's all he's worried about?

"What do you know?" I asked suspiciously.

"Well, I know that when I find a man fiddling with a chair that someone died in, it's best to play my cards close to my chest." Got me there, but I had another one coming.

"Really? Well, I know that when I find a man loitering near a chair that someone died in, I do just the same."

He smiled and stuck out his hand, balancing the metal piece in his other hand. "Perkins. Chief Engineer."

"The Doctor. Nosey Parker." We shook hands.

He chuckled. "Pleased to meet you Doctor. Course, there's a rumor that someone or something else might be responsible."

*******************************

P.O.V: Clara Oswald

Later that night, I was lying on the plush bed of my sleeping compartment, talking to Danny.

"A train in space? Sounds pretty cool." He laughed over the phone.

"So, what are you saying? Just because he brought me somewhere cool, I shouldn't dump him?" I asked.

"Well, one, you can't dump him because he's not your boyfriend. And two, dumping him sounds a little scorched earth. You still basically get on. I think you should just enjoy your space train. At least it's not dangerous."

Yikes, what should I say? "Yeah. It's pretty boring, really." There! Even though I didn't know for sure what was happening on this train, I wasn't going to brush it off, nor tell Danny.

A few minutes later, we'd ended our conversation and said our goodnights.

I slipped out of my room and went out into the corridor. I walked over to the Doctor's door.

"Doctor, are you awake?" No response. He must be asleep. I went back into my sleeping compartment and got dressed, then stepped back out. I turned and took a few steps, and found Miss Pitt in her pajamas holding one of her shoes heading the same way as me.

"Hello? Are you okay? Hello? Excuse me? Excuse me?" I asked, concerned. She didn't respond. I followed her into the baggage car.

"Miss Pitt, wasn't it? Are you all right? Do you need some help?"

She turned towards me, shaking her head.

"My name's Maisie. I'm not mad." She said softly. Why would she say that?

"Oh, okay. Er, I didn't say you were, but you've had a bad day. I think anybody could do with a little bit of help after a day like today." She didn't respond, and turned towards the panel next to a heavy door, labeled 'Private Company Property.'

"Computer, open the door." She said calmly.

An automated voice was heard, saying, "Call me Gus. I'm afraid this door can only be opened by executive order."

There was a thumbs down icon on the panel, and it made a sad noise.

"Are you okay?" I asked her once more, as she began crying out in angry shrieks and pressing the buttons on the keypad frantically.

"They won't let me see her body. They should let me see her body, shouldn't they?" She said, her voice shrill and angry.

"Er, yeah, I should think so. It's in there, is it? Okay, I have a friend who's really good with locks. Do you want to come with me, see if we can find him?" I suggested, but she wouldn't have any of it.

"Oh!" She cried in annoyance. She lifted the shoe she was holding in her hand and slammed the heel into the control panel, shorting it out. The icons changed from a telescope on a tripod, to a thumbs down, it couldn't make up it's mind. The door opened.

"Or you could do that because that works, too."

I followed Maisie into the room and the door closed behind us.