I'll Be Here Patiently Waiting ~ a Phanfiction ~

Chapter 19 - I Won't Give Up (FINAL CHAPTER).

Dan's POV (why do I still say this xD):

Dan was falling. Falling endlessly. Not in love, but in hate, in anger, into the predicted darkness, but he didn't tell anyone this. No shouts for help. No ropes to stop him from falling further. Nothing. If he couldn't tell Phil this, what was the point in confining in anyone else? Weirdly enough though, it wasn't really awkward 2 weeks after the breakup, but that was mainly because Dan was a good actor. A pretender of false emotions. It was if they were just friends to begin with. So... They were best friends.

"This is all my fault." Dan muttered under his breath, punching the white, plastered wall.

It hurt Dan that Phil didn't suspect there was anything wrong, but it was also a relief. Dan knew if Phil found out he felt, maybe their friendship wouldn't last long. If the closest they could be was best friends, then that was fairly good for Dan. Their friendship was also important.

Dan was pretty numb for a while too. And Aaron must of found out about the breakup in a creepy, stalkerish way as he tried to contact Dan more, coincidentally. And one time, whilst Dan was going to the Co Op to do some regular food shopping, he turned around and listened to what Aaron had to say, while dropping ham and pineapple pizza box in the shopping basket.

"Dan, hey, how are you?" Aaron asked, itching the back of his neck.

"Meh... You?".

"Yeah, good, heard about you and Phil. Pretty tragic." Aaron said in a way so less cocky and more or less... friendly.

Dan didn't bother responding and walked on trying to forget he was there.

"Hey, hey, I was thinking we could give us a try. Y'know, back to the good days.". Dan froze where he was walking and thought. And that's when he realised how low he was. He was actually considering it. Taking back Aaron after everything.

"... No.".

Later, Dan arrived home, drenched in the expected yet unexpected rain. He stored the frozen food in the freezer, then the cereal in the to cupboards. After storing everything, Dan ran to his bedroom, carefully shut the door behind him and dive bombed into his bed and turned into a cocoon made up of his lime green and dark grey spotty duvet and rain/tear damp pillows. He couldn't comprehend anything no more.

"Dan?". It was Phil's voice.

Dan pretended to be asleep and didn't answer. Phil quietly and slowly pushed the door open. "I know you're awake.". Dan rotated himself so he wasn't facing Phil, to be maybe more convincing to hide his reddened face.

"Just thought, er, I would say hi.". Phil spoke quietly. "So... Hi.".

"Okay, now leave." Dan mumbled, biting his lip hard.

"Okay." Phil said, and with that, left Dan's room, closing his door slightly more abruptly. Dan could let out small whimpers to himself.

3 years later: 2013. The year of accomplishments and pride for Dan and Phil. They had their own radio show on BBC Radio 1, which was baffling. Dan had hit 1 million subscribers on YouTube, which Dan couldn't get over. Phil was getting close (900,000). The two had won the Sony Headphones award. Even more wow. It was remarkable. Amazing.

Dan and Phil had also moved into a flat in London too, in Islington.

Dan eventually did reach the ground, but to his surprise, there was a trampoline, and this trampoline shot him up into the air, but Dan was too pleased to realise he would start to fall again. And the falling did start again.

Dan's diary:

Well, hasn't it been a while since I wrote in you, old friend? For once, I thought I felt happy, thought I felt grateful, well, I am happy and grateful for all the achievements that have happened in the year, but true happiness. I thought I was over him, diary. Thought I would never return to that sinking pit ever again. I was wrong. So very wrong. It's been 3 fucking years and I still love him. Do you know how hard it is to love someone who will never love you back again?