My story, My mistakes, My broken Heart

Aftermath

Bre woke early Saturday morning not being able to sleep much the night before. The past week had been hard on her, she wasn't sure if she made the right choice or not, but at the moment she couldn't dwell on that she was meeting Mike for breakfast at Elmers, and then heading to the drag strip to meet her Uncle, and a bunch of the guys along with Mikes dad. As much as she had butterflies in her stomach Bre was also looking forward to seeing Mike, she was scared she made a mistake but that didn't change that Mike was her friend, or that she loved him. If Bryan didn't know that something was up before, he knew that morning, Bre went through 5 or six wardrobe changes, took forever to get her hair and make-up just right, she didn't want to look like she was trying but she also wanted things to be perfect, she was seeing the guy she slept with. When she was finally ready to go, she couldn't even listen to the radio her thoughts were all over the place. What would she do if Mike never wanted to see her again? What if they kissed in front of her Uncle and he got mad? What if they saw her buddy Devon, or Kerry, and they gave her a hug? Would Mike think that now he can claim her as his or would give her space? Was Mike going to be glued to her side, or would she be free to wander? What were her friends and family going to think about her hanging out with him? The list went on and on, and the closer that she got to him, the sicker she felt. By the time she had pulled into the parking lot she was ready to call everyone and say she had the flu and just go hide in her room, at least she was safe there.

Stepping out of her car she was greeted by two arms, and kisses "Baby, I missed you this week, how are you?" again Mike knows when to be the sweet attentive guy, if he wants to keep this going.

"I missed you too, I really did." she says almost on the verge of tears

"Baby, are you okay? You know I would never leave you, I wasn't with you just for sex, you get that right?"  this time his concern was genuine but not just because he cared about her, mainly because he didn't want someone else to have her if he couldn't Bre was his now.

"No Mike, I am sorry I am not okay, I feel awful can we just get breakfast and talk a little, no kisses, no baby I love you, I need Mike, and Bre to have a conversation, not the two people we have been since december." she said tears finally falling from her eyes, no longer able to keep them in.

"Of course Bre, lets get a table. remember I am your friend first and foremost, everything else. No matter what I need you to understand that. You need to know that you can tell me anything, and it won't matter, I am not going to turn my back on you ever, I promise you that, you mean the world to me."  with that he gently guided her inside and into a corner booth where they could talk over breakfast. "Okay Bre, what is wrong, what happened to make you afraid? Was it to soon, should I have stopped, I am sorry if I should have, but I didn't want to I wanted you Bre, I want you to be mine, we just can't be official yet, a few months okay please?"

"I am afraid, not of you Mike of me, of what I am becoming around you, I feel like I am losing myself and who I am to you, when I decided to have sex with you it wasn't supposed to be because I was too tipsy to think about the consequences, I wanted to go into it knowing that this is what I wanted no matter what happened after, and that is not how I felt. I felt like I had sex with you, just because no reason, not because I loved you, or you were my boyfriend, but because you were there, and that isn't how I wanted things to be. I felt like a slut afterward. Mike this isn't me I am not the friends with benefits type of girl you know that. I haven't had an easy time with guys, my heart had been broken, and I feel like I am going to get it broken again with you, that your never going to have me be your girlfriend, I know at first that isn't what I wanted, but it is now. I want to know that you are mine and no one else's. Is that fair to ask of you Mike? Can you promise me that you are mine and I am yours, whether we put a title on it or not? Will you do that for me?" as she spoke she regained her composure and her strength, Mike wasn't going to kiss the hurt away this time. He was going to answer her honestly, and she was going to be okay no matter what she was strong enough to take the risk.

"Bre, I can't call you my girlfriend I am not ready for that, I don't want to feel trapped, or to make you feel trapped, but I promise you that you are the most important woman in my life, and that I love you. It wasn't just sex because you were the girl there, I never want you to feel like a Slut your not, your beautiful, you kind, you feel with all your heart, you think of others before your self, and you love with everything you are. I have never met a girl who I would want to be with more, whether we ever have sex again or not, I would still want you in my life, I would still want you by my side, Bre you are my friend, you are my snuggle buddy, you are the girl who is wiggling her way into my heart, I am just not ready to commit, I am not ready to be part of the family, or be in your group of friends, it is harder for me, my family loves you, my friends adore you, you are lovable, and hardly anyone ever dislikes you. But me your family hates me, your friends don't trust me, Bryan scares me, because I know that a word from him, and you would be gone. Can you understand that, and still be with me. I don't want to lose you or things to change, hell I still want to have sex with you, and this time do it right, let you choose no alcohol involved. Can we do that baby? Can we try a little longer to make this work without labels without the constant need for your family or friends to approve? Please baby try to make it work, try to be my girl, I promise you that every weekend they race we will go to the track and spend time with your uncle, I promise not to kiss you in front of him, as long as I can touch you, hold you, know that your there with me, and your mine. I promise that I will never complain when you go off with Bryan instead of spending the weekend with me, I promise to take care of you. Baby will you stay with me?" he knew he had her, and he did it without lying she was the most important woman in his life, he never said his only, and he would take care of her, and do his best to be there for her. he wasn't heartless he did love her, just not the same way that she loved him. He wanted her as his and he didn't want to share her with anyone else.

"Yes, Mike, I can do that, that sounds perfect." she grinned happily, feeling like she won the lottery, when really all she did was once again, let Mike win.

Bre and Mike finished there breakfast, and then went to the track, they ended up having a great day, and Mike kept all his promises, though he never let Bre more then an arms length away from him. Little to her knowledge that was how her life was going to be, she was Mike's and he was not letting her out of his site, just because he couldn't kiss her in front of her Uncle didn't mean she was ever going to be out of his grasp, and it did not make it okay for other guys to touch her. She was his, whether she knew it or not, she had fallen for a guy who was going to control her life without her knowledge.