Love doesn't exist?(N.H) {ON HOLD}

Chapter 33

(Paisley's POV)

It is Christmas break now. And without Bonnie here, the house is fully decorated with everything we have in memory of her. I have nothing to be sad about because she is always around me, but I feel guilty about not telling the others that I can see and communicate with her when they cannot.

  The first time I saw Bonnie's ghost outside of the hospital nearly made me shit my pants.

  (Flash back...)
    I have been sleeping in Bonnie's room for the past few days. I can't believe she is dead. I always thought I would be the one to die before graduation; not her.

  I miss seeing her platinum blonde hair and her gray eyes first thing in the morning. I am so lonely, I feel like I have no one. I know I still have JJ and maybe Jack now but she was my best friend; my sister.

  I had known her for most of my life and she was my rock. She kept me grounded when I thought I was loosing my mind. Her laugh was music to my ears.

  Then all of a sudden, I heard it. I heard her laugh. It was like she was there with me. In the room with me. Watching the TV with me. I had on sponge bob. My favorite episode was on and I couldn't even laugh at it. 

"What the hell is that?" I whispered to myself.

  "Paise! This is absolutely hilarious! Why aren't you laughing?!" It asked. It sounded like Bonnie.

  "Bonnie?" I flipped over in the bed to look at the her.

  "Yes?" Her body was covered in blood. Just the way she looked when she died. She was in a hospital gown with her hair all over the place. It looked red from all the blood that she had lost in her head.

  "What are you doing here?" I hesitated to ask.

   "Watching Tv, what are you doing here?" She replied like her usual self.

I thought for a minute. What am I going to say to her. I am alive and you are dead. I can see ghosts and you are one?

"Bonnie, there is something I have to tell you..."

"What is it Paise?" She looked at me with her gray eyes, but now they were lifeless.

"You're dead..."

(End of flash back)

JJ has came over and hung out with me a lot since the accident. He doesn't want me to be along, he told me. I don't think I should be alone either but I always am, no matter if I have the people I love around me.

Peyton and Liam have been keeping me busy but I wish mom would be home more. She is working more than ever and I hardly ever see her anymore. I know this has been hard on her but it should have made her want to spend more time at home, not at work.

-Christmas Eve-

Today is Christmas Eve and it is also Joey's birthday, Seventeen. I can't believe he is that old now. I feel old being the oldest. JJ is younger than me by a few months.

Whilst exchanging birthday gifts for Joey, JJ and I are also giving each other our presents since he won't be here tomorrow. His family came all the way from Texas and some of my family is in town as well. I will be with my dad's side of the family. After breakfast tomorrow morning I will be staying with them for the day.

Sitting on the couch, JJ handed me a small gray box, it was plush. It took me off guard for moment until I opened it to find a necklace, not a ring.

It was a silver heart shaped locket. There was a small diamond in the middle.

I opened it see two pictures. One on each side. The left side is a picture of JJ and I and the other side was a picture of Bonnie and I.

"I love you" I choked back the tears that were now forming.

Thank you all for reading. I am so so sorry that it has been such a while since I updated last. I have just had no ideas for the current plot line. I have also had no motivation to do it. Now that I am on break from school I will try to get another chapter out before I go back. And again I am sorry for any spelling or grammatical errors.

"I loved you too... Always"