I cant sleep. Even though things are getting better, there's no way this depression will get off me. Its slowly consuming me, eating me. Soon there wont be any of me left.
I hate being depressed. I could hear the blades calling my name.
''I wish I didnt cut in the first place.'' I stared at my wrist.
Im tired. Im tired of feeling so numb. Relief exists. I find it when Im cut.
''Bitch.'' ''Useless brat!'' ''Worthless.'' ''Emo.'' ''Loser.'' ''Slut.'' ''Lonely.'' ''Pathetic.''
Their words, again, teared me apart.
''Why? Why do I have to feel this way? Why do it feels like im drowning while people around me is breathing.'' I thought to myself, looking at the sleeping pills on the desk.
I feel sad. I feel like crying. I feel mad. I feel miserable. Im dying. I want to die for no reason.
I began to cry and shaking like hell.
My mind starts to fuck with me. It starts to flashback all the mistakes I have done in my life. It hurts. Im done fighting, crying, dying. Im just DONE with all this bullshit.
I hate everyone. I hate how they discredit me. I dont wish for a life like this.
Im sick of saying sorry when im the one collapsed on the ground with my lungs bursting, feels like a million knives stabbing me all over.
I took a large amount of sleeping pills.
''I dont wanna wake up and get through this hell anymore. Maybe they will start loving me when im gone.'' I thought to myself, swallowing the pills that drove me to bed.
The sun is up. I woke up with these feelings as usual.
''I guess overdose wont work.'' I mumbled. Disappointed.
Then my phone rang.I was surprised. No one ever called me before. I look at the screen and saw the name. SAM. I didnt pick it up.
''Im sorry, Sam. I cant talk to you right now. Everything keeps falling apart. I dont want to rely on you too much.'' I thought to myself and went out from the house and start walking to school.
Meanwhile
Sam was breathing heavily in her room. She then starts to cough heavily.
"No.. not now please... I can't skip school today.. Sarah didn't answer me..there must be something wrong...but...my chest hurts..." she fell to her knees.
"Lunch...I'll come during lunch break. Sarah..please..be okay when I'm not there..." she thought as she started to cough up blood.
"Hey..that freak is alone today....her bodyguard is not here..I bet she ditch her after knowing she cut herself!" yelled the other girl to her friends.
I kept my head down and walked faster to my class. People started to tripped me, shove me, insult me. Why? Because Sam is not here. I felt useless. I can't do anything to take care of myself.
I pull on my hoodie and plugged my earphone. I just wanna run away. I wanna escape. I end up running away from school.
''Just gonna skip first and second period. That wont hurt, right. Plus, no one will notice that im not there. Im not even important.'' I said as I dashed out from the school.
Sam was running towards the school. There was only one thing in her mind. Sarah. She was worried. She didn't care about her health. Her care broke down,resulting her to run to school.She collapsed but staggered to stood up.

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A Spark Of Hope (#Wattys2016)
Teen Fiction||UNDER EDITING || [ I just want to die. ] This story is about Sarah, a young teenage girl who is suffering from depression, anxiety and mental breakdown. She wants to die. She thinks that she dont have any reasons to live anymore. Will she win or w...