Crowley paced the cracked black top of the ally way with little patience. He had already been waiting for half an hour and it was starting to wear thin; he was the King of Hell and he shouldn't have to wait for anyone.
The rumbling of a truck engine broke him from his thoughts; he looked up just as the shiny black beast came to a stop in front of him. Crowley watched her get out of the cab; red lips fixed in a scowl and heeled boots clicking on the road.
"You're late!" He snarled
"I'm here now aren't I?" She replied venomously, flipping her Y/H/C hair over her shoulder; leather jacket pulled tight across her chest, even though she didn't feel the cold.
"I'm still your King; don't think for a second that because you're my favourite you're not replaceable"
"Save the speech on how you could deep fry me with a flick of your wrist Crowley...why am I here?"
"I have a job for you"
"I'm not one of your low level boot lickers all dying for your attention" She scoffed.
Her normally Y/E/C orbs flicking black as she regarded him coolly; Crowley only smiled wider.
"It wasn't a suggestion love, think of it as more of an order"
"I don't do favours...especially for you. I might be a demon now but it doesn't mean I don't hate you"
"That stings Y/N truly...after all I did give you your body back...besides I think you'll like this job"
"What is it?"
"Dean Winchester" He stated simply; watching with amusement as a guttural growl erupted from her throat, her shoulders tensing as soon as she heard his name.
"You want me to babysit your new BFF? That's cruel...even for you Crowley"
"It's just business darling; you're the only one who can hold their own against Dean, you know his every move and that gives you an advantage. The mark needs to feed, it needs blood and he is becoming reckless without all that humanity weighing him down...I need someone to keep an eye on him and who better then the girl who used to share his bed"
"I think you're wasting your time...what makes you so sure he'll listen to me? It's been five years since I've seen him"
Human emotions and feelings really had no effect on Y/N anymore; after her soul had been warped and broken she stopped feeling anything, it all began to hurt less. It didn't mean she didn't want to see Dean though; after all she had spent years loving that man...right up until she died for him that was.
Y/N didn't blame him though; she was sure that if he knew where she had been five years ago he would have found her before her untimely departure; but they had fought that night and she had told him bluntly to never look for her...never call her and to stay out of her life forever. It wasn't long after that she found herself chained to a table; a black eyed son of a bitch staring down on her asking where the Winchester brothers were...it was always the same story.
She had been tortured on and off for a week before her body finally gave out, dehydration, blood loss, broken bones...they'd all played their parts. Crowley had been there in the end – ready to claim her soul as he put it.
By the time Y/N had come back to reality Crowley was long gone; leaving her there alone. She knew she didn't have a choice though...like he said, and order was an order; even if she used to be a hunter she batted for the other team these days.
Leaving her truck parked where it was she walked across the street to the bar; the patter of a summer storm hitting the street around her.
Dean was a demon now so she didn't have to worry about any hard feelings between them; she just wondered what this side of him was like. Whether deep down he was the same person she knew all those years ago; without the guilt that plagued him constantly, without the hatred he felt for himself. She wanted to have some fun and Dean was still by far the best she had ever had.
A few wolf whistles followed her in through the door, but she only had her eyes on one. Plaid shirt visible from across the room, his shoulders tensed tight as he downed another shot of whiskey. Some things never changed. Without him knowing she was there Y/N reached over his shoulder, plucking the glass straight out of his hand; his eyes followed it until he glimpsed her face, the lines on his tightening considerably.
"Well I never thought I'd see you again Sweetheart" he slurred
"I guess fates cruel like that Sugar" she replied, he rolled those beautiful green eyes of his before turning to glare at her.
"Did Sammy send you? think that I still had feelings for you deep down and that maybe you could cure me some how? his starting to get desperate if he called you"
"Try the other side" Y/N retorted, she flashed her eyes and noticed his jaw tighten again...if that was even possible.
"Crowley then...guess where ever he is his probably getting a real kick of this; I don't know what he sent you here to do exactly but you're wasting your time Y/N"
Dean motioned to the bar tender, turning away from her completely. She let out a small huff and downed his previously forgotten shot; the burn ran down her throat like fire. With one short movement her hand was resting on his thigh...fingernails digging into the denim of his jeans.
"Come on Dean...why does it always have to be some sinister scheme...there's no more feelings left between us baby it wouldn't mean anything if we had a little fun...don't you remember the fun we used to have?" She purred into his ear, hot breath fanning out over his neck; Dean couldn't help the bulging in his pants at her words but nonetheless pried her hand away from him, shifting in his seat slightly. He watched her face meld from shock into frustration; he smirked. "You don't know what you're missing out on Dean" Dean however did know what he was missing out on; when he was still human, for years he hoped Y/N was going to come back...that he would open that door and she'd be there. But that was a long time ago; he still wanted her now but there was nothing emotional about that, this Y/N was sexier than the old one and he would have loved to take her right there and then; but he knew better. She was here for Crowley, probably just making sure he didn't get up to anything; but that fact didn't change anything. He wasn't sure if he trusted Crowley and if he couldn't trust him then he wasn't about to trust Y/N either...no matter how tempting." >
Dean watched her walk back across the room, leaning against the juke box as she chose another song. He couldn't help but admire everything he had loved about her; nothing had really changed in five years, except maybe the way she presented herself. It was more confident, like she wasn't afraid to flaunt her every curve anymore; they used to be just for him.
The Y/N he knew would hide under baggy plaids, messy buns and little makeup; there used to be no mistake she was beautiful, just now you couldn't miss it.
font>
Dean stayed and drank himself stupid, it took more alcohol to get him drunk these days but he was as determined as ever to reach that buzz. His attention had been captured by the blonde serving the booth near him; he was enjoying thinking about all the things he could do to her and knowing that Y/N would be watching his every move.
Y/N was sitting in a far booth, sipping out of her glass contentedly as she watched him eyeball the blonde waitress. Her vision was cut off abruptly however by another demon; he had slicked black hair and a tight black sweater, she rolled her eyes.
"What do you want?" She hissed. "The boss wants an update"
"On what exactly? He hasn't moved in four hours" "He has a job for the both of you...cross roads deal; give Winchester the chance to kill something...tomorrow night"
"Fine...just get out of my sight, I can't exactly watch him if your head is in the way now can I?"
But by the time the demon had moved Dean was already gone...and so was the blonde.
"Dammit!" She cursed.
***
The next morning when Y/N was walking towards the bar – already knowing Dean would be in there drinking – she was stopped by someone grabbing her arm tightly. He spun her around and slammed her up against the wall. Let him do his worse, she thought humorously; it had been awhile since she had killed anyone and she could practically feel the excited racing through her veins.
"Where you going in such a rush Doll...why don't you stay and have a little fun with me"
The man was a few feet taller than her, muscles rippling across his shoulders arms, a long nasty scar running the length of his right cheek...this was going to be too easy.
Before she could push him back however another person was lifting his weight off of her; she flicked her eyes over to Dean's figure, throwing the man against the hood of the nearest car; she couldn't help the shock and confusion wash over her, why would he care now?
"You wanna touch her again scumbag?" He hissed violently, "Why don't you go through me first"
Dean raised his fist in the air before bringing it down on the guys face, over and over and over again. Y/N broke out of her haze after a moment and restrained Dean's arm; the man was passed out, his face raw and bloody. A crowd had gathered around the entrance, backing away slowly as Dean looked at them.
"What the hell is your problem Dean!"
"Your welcome!" he spat back, shaking free of her hold on him
"I'm not some fragile human who can't look after themselves, there was no need to get involved"
"Good to know you're just as ungrateful in this life as you were in the old one"
Y/N felt her blood boil at his words, with a flick of her hand he was flying back through the air, slamming into the wall she had previously occupied. Walking up to him she wrapped her hand around his throat, his Adams apple bobbing against her palm
"Don't underestimate me Dean I've been doing this a lot longer than you have" Her eyes were murderously black, fingernails drawing blood on the side of his neck, "Crowley has a job for you...here's the address, try not to mess it up if you can" This was all getting to be too much; this plan wasn't going to work if Dean for some unknown reason kept jumping in to "save" her...he was a demon; Cold and murderous...he wasn't supposed to care! But Y/N could feel some of her own emotions digging there way back up and it scared her; they'd been buried for so long who knew what they would do to her when they came out...she couldn't let that happen...she had to get away from him! font>
She pressed the folded up piece of paper into his hand, the one holding the address; before letting him fall back against the sidewalk..
"Where are you going?" Dean asked "Away from you...I'm done with this game" With one final look in his direction she walked away. ***
Crowley found Y/N already halfway through a bottle of whiskey, her hair messed up as though she had been running her fingers through it all day. It had been two weeks since she had checked up on Dean; he could've been anywhere by now...she just couldn't bring herself to care that much. She looked up at Crowley with a bored expression, taking a large mouthful straight out of the bottle
"What do you think you are doing?" He asked harshly, knocking the bottle out of her grasp. She watched it roll onto the floor, the amber liquid spilling out onto the dark wood.
"I can't be around him anymore!"
"That wasn't your decision to make! And now thanks to you his cost me a client!"
"Not my problem Crowley...get someone else to watch him...I'm done"
"Oh your done alright trust me...Moose and I have made a little deal, he'll take squirrel off my hands in exchange for the blade"
"Good for you then"
"Your think you get off that easy Y/N? You still disrespected a direct order and it'll cost you"
She looked at him for a split second before he clicked his fingers; she was now in a barred room, the walls oozing black and red; screaming was coming from all around her...Crowley had thrown her back into the pit.
With wide eyes and shallow breaths Y/N looked around the room; there was a tray in the corner filled with an assortment of bolts and screws...a demon bladed gleaming wickedly in the dim light.
"Ready to get started Sweetheart?"
She whirled around at the sound of the voice; Dean standing in the corner, arms across his chest and a smirk plastered across his mouth.
"What is this?" Y/N asked with a curled lip; Dean only laughed before walking towards the tray, picking up the blade and running his finger across the sharp edge.
"This is your own personal Hell Y/N...welcome home"
She had barely any time to scream before the blade was tearing open her abdomen, blood spraying out onto the floor. Dean (Or a made up version of him) smiled down on her, raising the blade once again. This time she was ready for it, tensing her muscles just before the blade hit her. It didn't make it any less painful though, tears rushed to her eyes as she cried out...
***
Sam and Cas watched with apprehensive looks as the last of the blood worked its way through Dean's system; he looked up at them as the onyx melted away, leaving behind the original hue of green.
"You looked worried fellas" He stated looking at each of them in turn
"Welcome back Dean"
Sam clapped him on the back before untying him from the chair; engulfing him into a tight hug the moment he was free.
Dean scrunched his eyebrows together as a rush of memories ploughed into him, everything he had seen and said as a demon. He gasped as a face stuck out; both Sam and Cas looked at him worriedly.
"What is it Dean?" Cas asked carefully.
"Y/N" Dean muttered sadly; he could remember talking to her clearly...see those black eyes almost perfectly, "We have to find her!"
And find out what happened five years ago that caused her to turn into a demon.
The hours and days had started blending in together; there was no end and no beginning, everything was a hazy blur of pain and blood. Y/n's tongue slipped out between her teeth as she licked her cracked lips; she could still taste the metallic twang of the dried blood, left from the last visit she had. She blew out a shaky breath as she leaned her head back against her shoulder; looking at her hands suspended above with rusty hooks. She felt weak for the first time in years, felt human.
The dehydration had kicked in what seemed like a few days ago and it brought back all the horrid memories of the first time...the only difference however was this time she couldn't die from it; there was no sweet release of death waiting around the corner for her, no escape as her body dried up.
Crowley had bewitched the room she was in; it stopped her body from healing itself, a simple trick really, but no less cruel. She could feel every cut and bruise, feel every drop of blood leaving her body. She pleaded for it all just to go numb so she didn't have to feel it but it never came.
She flicked her eyes open as the cell door opened with a loud shriek, scraping along the old floor. As she saw Crowley standing there she rolled her eyes and turned away.
"How are we this morning love?"
when she didn't reply he let out a deep chuckle, moving further into the room so he could crouch in front of her. Reaching out he grabbed her chin, jerking her around until she was looking directly into his face; she hissed at the movement but still didn't say a word.
"Don't look like you didn't deserve this y/n, I can't have demons running around and disobeying orders...particularly when said demon was a hunter...they'll all think I've gone soft if I hadn't of punished you" She glared at him, her chest rasping with her shallow breaths. "There were worse things I could have done to you and I'm sure you know that. Besides I'm here with a proposition...a job if you will; if you do it then I'll give you a second chance, let you back topside"
"What's the job?" She croaked; her voice hoarse from lack of use. It came out barely more than a whisper but he still heard it, his sadistic grin spreading further across his lips.
-
"Dammit!" Dean swore as he threw his cell phone back onto the table; one of the most reliable leads he'd had all week fell through and he was beyond pissed.
It had been a few weeks since he had come back and he'd spent almost that whole time searching for y/n...he needed to find her, needed to make this right. Just the thought of her being anything like what he had been as a demon caused the bile to rise into the back of his throat; you were the kindest person he had ever met in his life, always so full of light. Even if he didn't want to admit it out loud you were the person that had kept him grounded when he was losing control; the one shinning light he had in his life. That was until you walked out the door five years ago and he stupidly let you go...
After that door had slammed behind you he kept telling himself you were coming back, after all you had all been through so much together...that meant something right? But after he had woken up in the morning and there was still no sign of you he let the heartache wash over him. You really weren't coming back that time; it was still the biggest mistake he had ever made.
Dean was knocked from his thoughts by the arrival of Cas; and by the look on his face he hadn't found anything out either.
"Nothing?" Dean asked sadly, his own face falling into a frown.
"No I am sorry Dean...even though she is a demon her ribcage still has the angel warding...it makes it impossible to track her"
"Thanks anyway Cas..." He was about to grab his phone to call another possible lead when Sam came into the room carrying a bunch of supplies in his arms. "Sammy...what are you doing man?"
"Well...I was thinking" He dropped everything onto the table, "If anyone knows where she would be than it would be Crowley right?"
"You want to summon Crowley?" Cas asked doubtfully; it wasn't like Crowley was the most reliable source they had, and everything that had happened with Dean recently made them all a little weary.
"It's worth a shot right?" Sam answered.
"Well this is a surprise" Crowley sneered as he appeared in the bunker, "Squirrel, moose and wings this must be important"
"We need some information" Sam started, stepping up towards him.
"Let me guess...you want to know where y/n is right?"
"Where is she?" Dean hissed venomously, the mark on his arm twitching as he looked at him
"Nowhere that concerns any of you"
"You had some nerve making her a demon" Dean spat, Sam placed a reassuring hand on his brothers shoulder, not quite restraining him but with enough force to hold him back.
"Her soul was up for grabs and I took the opportunity...besides having the Winchesters plaything on my side was a bonus"
"Where. Is. She?"
"Sorry boys...really can't help you"
Before anyone of them could react Crowley was gone; leaving them with no leads and little hope on ever finding her. Dean slumped down into the closest chair, running his hands through his hair.
-
Y/n found the warehouse easily; located just out of town at the end of a long dirt road. Why was it always abandoned warehouses? She thought to herself with a laugh.
Her truck rumbled to a stop near the front doors; she grabbed her blade from the glove compartment before jumping out onto the gravel. It crunched under her feet as she made her way up to the entrance; she could already hear the yelling echoing from inside.
She made her way to the end of the corridor, yellow light seeping out into the darkness. The yelling was getting louder as she approached; three voices. This was almost too easy.
The demon was chained into a chair, screaming violently as holy water was poured over his head; the hunters back towards her as she walked into the room, swinging the blade between her hands.
"Y/n...is that you?"
Y/n turned towards the voice; her grin widening as she took in the black hair and chestnut eyes. Casey was a hunter she had met back with Sam and Dean; they hunted occasionally with them for a few years, they used to be friends. At the sound of Casey's voice her hunting partner Shane turned around as well; his own blade dripping with the blood from his victim.
"Not that it's not nice to see you again...but what are you doing here?" He asked, eyebrows knitting together in confusion, "Are Sam and Dean with you?"
"No...we stopped hunting together a while ago" She replied
"Oh..." Casey replied, not sure exactly what to say. "Well I'm happy to see you"
Shane turned his attention back to the demon – who was staring at you with narrowed eyes – his back facing you completely.
Before Casey had the chance to say anything else y/n plunged the knife through her stomach; warm blood pouring down over her hand. She let out a choked cry, eyes widening as she took her last breaths. Y/n reefed the blade back out of her chest, looking towards Shane who was now looking at her, tears welling up along his waterline.
With her black eyes on full display Shane's face hardened, launching himself across the room towards her; blade raised high in his hand. They circled each other, each one sizing the other up. Even without thinking about it y/n knew she could beat him, even though he was taller and had more in the way of muscle it would be an easy win.
-
Dean was sitting across the table to Sam when his phone beeped, it was a text message. He felt his blood run cold as he saw her name on the screen.
"Sam..." He murmured; not exactly sure he wanted to open it.
"What?"
"Y/n...she uh texted me"
"What?!" he repeated, his voice slightly higher than before, "Open it"
Dean unlocked the screen, waiting for the message to load; as soon as it did he wished he had never looked. With a sick feeling in his stomach he passed the phone to Sam; he lifted his head with the same expression...disgust, anger and sadness.
Y/n had sent through pictures of what she had done to Casey and Shane, every gory little detail on display; at the end of the images was a written text.
Heard you were looking for me...
"Can you trace it Sammy?"
"Probably not from her phone...but if Shane or Casey had theirs on then maybe"
"Do it...she couldn't have gone far"
"Dean...I don't want to say this but maybe finding her is exactly what she wants"
"Like a trap? Come on Sammy...what would that achieve? She knows I can't die without becoming a demon again and I'm sure she's figured out that we want to cure her"
"Do you think curing her is the best option?" Sam spoke quietly; not meeting Dean's eyes
"I'm going to pretend I didn't hear that Sam" Dean's voice was low and dangerous, his eyes narrowed towards his brother.
"Dean...look I'm just saying...when you came back and you remembered everything you did you hated yourself...y/n's been a demon for a lot longer than you; what if turning her back does more damage than good?"
"I...I can't kill her Sammy...we need to at least try the cure...if it doesn't work..."
Sam didn't have to hear the end of the sentence to know what Dean was referring to; for his brothers sake he hoped that they didn't have to kill her, he wasn't sure that was something Dean could ever come back from. Sure he was tough but he had been chipping away ever since he had been cured; the nightmares haunting him every night, the guilt plaguing him when he was awake. Sam knew Dean needed y/n; he just prayed that it would okay.
-
Y/n knew it wasn't going to take them long to find her; she knew that Sam would trace her location and they would both come running. She was waiting patiently for them in town; covered in the blood of the family she had just killed. It covered her arms, spattered across her shirt and face but she didn't mind, in fact she kind of liked it.
She smiled widely when she heard the unmistakable sound of the impala's engine, two doors slamming in the driveway. She couldn't kill Dean but she could make him suffer; that thought alone sent a shiver down her spine, she wanted nothing more than to hurt him.
She was still twirling the blade when the brothers came into the room, cautiously moving with a gun each, raised in front of them...as if it offered any kind of protection. As soon as Dean laid eyes on her he felt his heart sink to the bottom of his stomach; she still looked the same but everything had changed about her...this wasn't the girl he used to know.
Sam's jaw locked tight as he trailed his eyes over her bloody figure; her wide smile making him feel sick.
"Y/n..." he breathed sadly
"What's the matter Sammy? I still look the same you know"
"'you're not the same...not even close"
"Ooh that hurts" She placed a hand over her heart and pouted; eyes flickering over towards Dean, he hadn't said anything since he had seen her, not trusting his own words, "Got nothing to say to me Dean?"
"You're coming home with us y/n"
"That isn't home anymore...hasn't been in five years Dean or don't you remember?"
"This isn't you sweetheart...please we can fix this"
"Fix this?! Fix what Dean...this was the way I was supposed to be...not some fragile woman who couldn't do anything right! I was a lousy hunter and a lousy human being"
"That's crap and you know!" he shouted, "You were the best damn hunter I knew..."
"Flattery gets you nowhere Dean" She replied harshly; standing up from the couch and walking towards them.
Dean gulped as she circled around Sam, trailing the knife edge over his chest and shoulders. He kept his gun trained on her but his hands were shaking, his breaths coming out in shallow bursts. He didn't want to have to shoot her.
"Don't do this" Dean pleaded, his voice cracking
"Do what?" She asked innocently, "Slit Sammy's throat? What would you do Dean...kill me?"
She dug the sharp edge against Sam's skin, drawing a small amount of blood; it trickled down his collarbone before disappearing under his shirt. She was about to make another cut when the sound of a gunshot broke her concentration.
She looked down at the gaping hole in her shoulder, feeling nothing more than a slight tickle; with a short laugh she went to take a step towards Dean when she suddenly realized she couldn't go anywhere; something was keeping her rooted to the spot...she growled towards the man who shrugged his shoulders lightly.
"Learned a few tricks since you were gone sweetheart...bullets with devils traps carved into them really do the trick...don't you think?"
"Kill me than" She hissed, "I don't want to be human again so you better just end it right now"
Sam clapped a pair of demon cuffs onto her wrists tightly just as Dean walked right up to her.
"No way y/n" He answered; with the butt of his gun he hit her temple, successfully knocking her out. This was going to be a long process he though bitterly.
Dean sat in front of the closed dungeon door, his head resting against his knees as he listened to her scream; it had been going on for hours and he wasn't sure how much longer he could take. The first few injections didn't affect her at all; she just sat there and made sarcastic comments towards him, cursing loudly every time he stuck the needle in her arm.
But as the hours rolled by her pain began more noticeable; the sweat clinging to her body, her heavy breathing and shaking hands were all tell tale signs; he hated doing this to her but Sam assured him that this was exactly what Dean himself had gone through and that she would pull through. Dean just hoped he was right.
"DEAN!" she screamed through the door, "Please stop...please"
this wasn't the first time she had begged him to stop and if he was completely honest with himself he was close to listening to her...maybe Sam had been right about damaging her further.
"Dean? Why must you torture yourself?" Cas asked quietly; Dean looked up towards the angel, not noticing that he was standing there at first.
"It's my fault she's like this"
"You didn't kill her Dean...Crowley did"
"I might of well have been me Cas...I'm the one who let her walk out that door"
"This guilt isn't healthy...you need to let it go and focus on her recovery"
Dean nodded his head slowly, understanding what the angel was trying to tell him but doubting whether he could ever forgive himself.
It took the better part of twenty four hours but finally the last injection was inserted; Dean watched from the back of the room as Sam pushed the blood into her veins. Her head had dropped forward and she was quiet...if it wasn't for the steady rising of her chest he would have believed she was dead.
"Y/n?" Sam asked cautiously, stepping back away from her.
She looked up with wide y/e/c orbs...the black long gone. She looked around the room before bursting into tears, her face dropped downwards as the sobs shook her frame. Without a seconds hesitation Dean was at her side, cutting away the ropes before pulling her body flush against his. With a small smile at each other Sam and Cas left the room, leaving the two of them wrapped up in each other.
Y/n fisted her hands into Dean's shirt, the hot tears creating a pool against The fabric.
"You'll be okay y/n" Dean kept repeating, "You'll be okay"
All she could do was shake her head; everything she had done would haunt her for the rest of her life.
"It's not...not...okay Dean" She sniffed, "I'm a...a monster"
"You're anything but a monster sweetheart...we're going to get through this together"
"I'm so sorry"
"I'm sorry too" He admitted, sitting onto the ground so he could pull her into his lap, "I'm just happy I got you back y/n...I'm never letting you go again"
he ran his hands through her hair, kissing the top of her head; she buried her face into the crook of his neck, letting his scent rush over her.
It wasn't anywhere close to being okay, but being here in Dean's arms she knew she wouldn't have to do this alone. He would be there through it all...
She was finally home.
