Vapor (unedited)

0.3

It was almost ten right then and she had a warm fresh milk on her nightstand. She drank it til the last drop and place it back on the nightstand. Her eyes caught the presence of a hardcover notebook, the worn out material seemed to beg her to write. She planned to write something before going to sleep. Elis wasn't sure, but the urge to write was so intense she felt a bit restless. She pinched the bridge of her nose and slowly rubbed her forefinger and her thumb across it to reduce the slight throbbing in her head. She lets out a huge breath and entered the bathroom to prepare for bed.

She cleansed her face and brushed her teeth. Then she examined the cleaned rows of teeth and possibly checking out her face. It wasn't something she will do often, she seldomly feel comfortable in her skin, and her face? It was one of the cause of her hatred on her own being. She felt ugly, but she knew that her face was just fine as it is. She felt her hips were too big for her own liking -which is true-  and there was too much fat accumulated on her tummy. Huge thighs and with wiggly adipose tissue that seemed to make her hated herself more.

But she was also the one who didn't really care about her own appearance, and this dark feelings of hatred of her own body will not be an issue and she will just accept herself and be try happy about it. It was hard, really, but Elis eventually get used to it that she didn't really care much about it.

There is a lot more to be think off rather than hating what you already have. Sometimes it's genetics thingy, but Elis knew that she can be thinner if she wanted to. Only, she couldn't think of wasting her energy to exercise and limiting her already excessed energy to not to eat. Food is one of the best miracle in the world, so she appreciated every food that existed even those that she didn't fond of.

She looked into her own dark chocolate eyes, the dark rings that circulate the pupil, the stretching of irises, it amazed her sometimes. Maybe it was dark chocolate, nothing special. Still, it was a dominant trait and the majority of homo sapiens that lived, has brown eyes. To think, some people desperately wanting to be those in the recessive traits, the blue ones which were mutants because they lack certain DNA which made them lack the pigments that colours their eyes. Though, even dimples were considered as a disability. And Elis certainly has dimples. Well, it wasn't really a bother as long these recessivity don't affect their health as a human being.

It was easier to accept what she has rather than hating them. It may be hard to love, but from acceptance, maybe love will follow suit. Who knows. Elis never really fond of herself. And maybe hate is a harsh word, but it certainly isn't true. It was something in between.

Which made her think, how did she even get into the nurse's room if there weren't (she had to use plural because Elis certainly aware of her bodyweight) somebody carrying her there. It would be a lie if it was Zach alone. Though that wasn't really a bother, but maybe baking them some cookies would show Elis' pathetic attempt of gratitude seemingly she can be a bit egoistic. She can ask later and say thanks again to Zach. He wasn't supposed to be sor-

He was sorry. He apologised before he drove off just then. Why?

Elis can't help but think about it. He seemed a bit flustered that may be the cause of his forgetfulness to say thank you. Elis certainly sure that he may have said it to mom, so maybe he wasn't rude. He can be a bit sarcastic at times, but what was the sorry for?

"Elis dear?" Paula's voice snapped Elis from her train of thoughts. She immediately walk out of the bathroom, careful with her footing on the wet tiles.

"Mom," Elis called out while tying her hair loosely.

"You aren't in bed yet, honey?"

"I was going to. I was preparing for bed and you came in. Is there something?"

"I don't know, but you want to go to school tomorrow?" Paula asked softly.

Elis frowned. "I got an early weekend, but when you asked, I am not sure. I kinda slept the whole day off, quite literally. And I think I am good to go if that's okay," she shrugged. Elis climbed her bed and pulling the blanket over her legs to get comfy.

Paula smiled softly but there was something else in her eyes that didn't seem to go well. Elis brushed it off thinking her mom was just tired and worn out from work. "You should rest too, mom. It's been a day and you need to work tomorrow. Go to bed." Elis instructed with a grin. Paula laughed warmly and hugged Elis in an embrace. She kissed Elis' head and say a goodnight.

Elis wasn't really sleepy, yet. But she still wanted to sleep, despite how early the night was. Her head was still giving out this small throb in the back of her head, it was like, having a low amplitude but high frequency that called sleep easier. Zach was the last thing she saw so suddenly before everything seemed to shut off and slumber consumed her easily like a room switched off from lights replacing soothing darkness around her.