Just Survive::AmericaXreader

Chapter Seventeen

You've been home for a week, and everyone knows about what Alice had done to you. Katyusha was expecting any day now, and Madelyn just recently found out she's pregnant. You introduced yourself to the few people that had been accepted in while you were gone, and you spent most of the time with your brother and Alfred. Rover only let you ride him again after eight months of hating anyone that would try to ride him. Mathias seemed more excited about the baby than Astrid did, but she was the pregnant one, so it made sense that Mathias was the excited one. Leon followed around Anna, who acted like she didn't like it, but you could tell she did. Tina and Berwald were trying to get their little girl, Susan, to walk, and Vash always had an eye on his and Anneliese's daughter, Sofie. Little Sofie was getting into anything and everything.

There was one thing, however, you noticed between the two you helped get together before you left. Feliciana was avoiding Ludwig, which deeply disturbed and distracted the German. So you approached her as she stood quite a bit away from Lovina and her twins, watching sadly. "Feli?" You muttered, causing her to jump.

"Oh, (Name)! You scared me!" She giggled, turning to face you.

You chuckled, motioning for her to sit with you at the nearest picnic table. "Sorry. But I need to talk to you." Feliciana nodded, sitting across from you. "It's about you and Ludwig." The Italian's smile slowly shrunk to a sad frown. "Why are you avoiding him? It's not his fault you had a stillborn, Feli. It's no one's fault. Things like that happen."

Tears started to slide down her cheeks, her amber eyes wide as she stared at the wooden surface. "I... I know it's not his fault... But... But what if it's me? What if that baby was some sort of sign?" You furrowed your brows and tilted your head. "What if that means I can't bear Ludwig any bambinos? When I was pregnant, he kept talking about how much he always wanted to have kids, no matter how messy they were. I'm scared I can't give him something he's always wanted, (Name)? What if I'm not supposed to have children? What if I can't be a good support to him when he needs it? What if he hates me when he finds out I can't have kids!?"

Listening to Feliciana, you grasped her hands in yours. "Please stop thinking like that, Feli. Ludwig loves you and will keep loving you no matter what. But, Feli... That was just the first. My mom's first was also stillborn. She didn't think she was allowed to have children either, then she had me, then Sarah, then Johnathan."

"Really?" Feliciana sounded hopeful, lightly gripping your hands. You smiled and nodded. "Do you really think I should try again?"

You chuckled. "Maybe. But don't try too fast, alright? Your body is still in mourning over it's loss. For now, just talk to Ludwig. Comfort and support each other. Then maybe after a while, you could try for another baby."

Feliciana practically leapt over the table and tossed her arms around you. "Thank you, thank you!" She chanted, squeezing you tighter. You giggled, hugging her back. After she finished hugging and thanking you, she hurried off to find the younger German.

Groaning, you stood and rubbed the back of your neck. "I feel so gross." You muttered, your gaze flitting about to look for Johnathan. When you couldn't find him, you started to panic. "J-Johnathan!?" You stuttered as you called out, rushing about. You peeked around every corner you passed and worry built in your gut. "Johnathan!?" You shouted, then sighed in relief when you saw him playing with Lovina's youngest, Camile. You walked up to Lovina and Antonio. "Hey, guys." You muttered with a grin. Antonio returned the grin and his partner just glanced over at you with a tilt of her head. "I'm headed to the showers. Could you watch Johnathan a little while longer?"