A Letter to the Ones I've Loved (Bully Luke Hemmings)

Entry 11

"I swear I will scream if you lay a finger on me." I say with a shaky voice as I am now pulled up too close for my comfort near Richard.

"I'm sorry." I try to back away when I hear him say this but we are in a weird narrow closet, so this action is impossible. I didn't want a fake apology and I certainly didn't want to be anywhere near Richard.

"I'm leaving." I couldn't forgive him. He made me feel like I could trust him then he made me fear him and now it feels as if he's stalking me. I feel no empathy for him even if he is only doing this because he is off his meds. Richard puts his mouth up to my ear, sending shivers down my spine.

"I tried to apologize. If you want to make this harder than it has to be, fine. I just wanted to say I love you." Richard breathes in my ear and all the hairs stand up on my neck. I push him away feeling violated and scared.

"W-what? I literally just met you and you've been stalking me! Richard, really listen to me. Listen. I don't love you. And I never will." I open the closet door and begin to exit,  feeling sick. Richard pulls my arm to whisper one last thing to me.

"Oh, babe. I know you love me too." And with that he kisses my hand and I run to the nearest bathroom.

What is happening? Is Richard insane? Why is he following me? I wash my hands until my skin becomes raw, not wanting any trace of Richard on my body. Then I wash my ear and it begins to bleed as I forgot I had earrings in and I ripped them from my skin. I feel nothing though except for confusion. The goosebumps on my skin won't disappear. My thoughts are running faster than my brain can make sense of them. I rinse off my bloody ear and take out my other earring and put them both in the pocket of my gown. I begin to walk to my room and pass Richard who winks at me and I keep walking, unwilling to look him in the eye.

-------------------------------------------

"Allie!"

"Dr. Pearle?" I ask as I enter my room, looking for Luke.

"Where's Luke?" I continue searching the room in a panic. I look under the beds and in the bathroom. No sign of him anywhere.

"Allie? Is your ear bleeding?" Dr. Pearle stands up from her spinny chair to grab my arm.

"WHERE'S LUKE?" I scream, panic growing inside me as I fear Richard will find Luke and hurt him. I throw her arm off me and pull my hair.

"Allie?" I hear a voice behind me and I turn and see Luke. I run and hug him tightly as I begin to cry. Luke's body is tense and he pulls me away to look at my face.

"What's wrong?" Luke seems confused.

"I-I thought Richard kill-killed you." I stutter as I try to control my breath and stop crying.

"Richard? Are you still seeing him?" I nod my head and wipe away my tears. Luke pulls me back in for a hug.

"Allie, do you mean the Richard you had a therapy session with recently?" Dr. Pearle asks. I pull away from Luke and face her and nod my head.

"Did you think he killed Luke?" Dr. Pearle's face contorts, making me feel stupid for ever thinking that.

"Yea." I nod my head.

"Why?" Dr. Pearle angles her head in interest.

"I think he's off his meds or something. I keep seeing him everywhere I go and he keeps threatening me and today he pulled me in a closet and told me he loved me and when I told him I didn't love him he said he was sure I did..." My voice drags out as I realize how unbelievable my story sounds. I turn to face Luke who took off his snapback and is now running a hand through his hair in frustration.