TAKEN: From a Prisoner to a star

14

"Unfortunately, the clock is ticking, the hours are going by. The past increases, the future recedes. Possibilities decreasing, regrets mounting."

― Haruki Murakami

1 month later,  December 20th 

Beyoncé POV

As we all know bad things happen, I know for a fact that every one in this world has some sort of problem, at home, at school, at work. In life. Everyone has something going on at some point and that's just the way life is. I think we would all benefit from reminding ourselves of that, remembering that you have no idea how bad someone's day has been before you saw them or how bad it will be when you leave them. You have no idea what they've been going through. We're all human, we all have feelings and flesh, we all use the toilet and we all have our bad days. Shit happens. But, sometimes really good things happen. Not only have I managed to spend a month with my family, catching up, I've also spent hours talking to Jay over the phone and I've had a lovely thanksgiving. I really think things are changing, things are getting better and good things are happening. But then again- bad things are happening. When I got home things did change for me, I got a therapist because people were scared about the physiological effects of everything that happened. I always assumed that once I was out and away from Curtis I would never see his face again, I would never feel any type of way but I do. In the night I see him, I feel him. I wake up with sweat running down my back and a bad throat from all the screams as my parents run into the room causing the door to fly open.  Every time I leave the house I can't help but look next door and expect to see him watching me from the window, and when I'm in church I feel like he's outside waiting for me. I didn't know I was going to feel this way. I honestly thought I would forget and move on but I can't. Something is stopping me from forgetting it all, forgiving him for it all and I don't know what it is. I don't know what is reminding me of it, I don't know what is causing me to feel the hell I went through all over again. But one thing that has remained a constant is my saviour. The moment the thoughts of that man touching me run through my mind I can call Jay and they would all go away. That's one of the good things. 

I was sat in the kitchen at the table, things didn't seem too different from how they used to be, my mom was at the counter cleaning up some mess she had made while cooking some breakfast, my dad was sat at the head of the table reading his news paper and Solange was sitting across from me eating yoghurt as usual with a thick book resting on the table. 

"Solange, honey can you please not read at the table" My mom said looking over to her from where she was, Solange rolled her eyes and placed the book on her lap causing my mom to smack her teeth and walk over to us. I felt the tension in the air as my dad lowered his news paper ever so slightly just so he could see and Solange gulped in fear. My mother then grabbed her ear and forced Solange's head around to face her. "Little girl, I  do not care how old you get but you will not roll your eyes at me. You will never disrespect me again" Solange pulled her head out of mom's hands causing my mother to rest her hands on her hips in annoyance, "I brought you into this world I can bring you right out of it" She looked down at Solange with angry eyes, eyes that Solange never used to get. I guess some things did change. 

"Mom, do you need some help cleaning?" I asked her trying to lighten the mood, without anyone talking this was all just going to be very awkward. 

"No thanks, could you turn on the radio for me?" She asked, I nodded my head and walked over to it on the kitchen counter and listened as the voice spoke. 

"So that was Fallin' by Alecia Keys and Next up we have a new joint from Jigga" The woman spoke with a strong New York accent and excitement in her voice. "So what do y'all think of Hov?" She asked, I had no Idea who she was talking about but then again I didn't think she was asking me for my opinion, so there must be someone in the studio with her.