Never Letting Go || CS

Chapter 23: The Date

The next thing they had to do was obtain a magic bean in order to cross realms. Hook had spent centuries on this island and did not wish to return, but he felt it to be his duty to save his Milah. After all, if he hadn't have agreed to taking her away from her family, she would have lived longer. At the time he had no regrets or fears about taking her, he knew Rumple was a coward, too afraid to fight for what he wanted. Looking back, he would have changed that, he would have left her with her family, it would have caused a lot less problems. Now he started to question whether it was right to do the same to Emma. Once again he had torn a family apart for love, and that was selfish. This time though, he had no regrets about his and Emma's situation.

Hook knew going to Neverland was dangerous, and he hated that it put Emma in danger, but he felt responsible for any kind of hell Milah was going through whilst of the island. He knew how the island worked, and how Pan worked. He twisted and manipulated everything to get his own way, doing whatever it takes. That's what worried him. If he took Emma there, she was at risk.

"Emma, darling?" Hook called as he knocked softly on the door. "Yea?" Emma's voice called from the other side. He opened the door and saw she was leant against the head of the bed reading a book. She looked up as he entered and smiled softly. "I've been thinking about this trip to Neverland..." Killian said softly as he sat down on the bed. Emma sat up and put her book down, marking her page beforehand. She nodded, urging him to continue. "It's really dangerous and I don't want you going." He said really quickly. Emma frowned, "What?" She growled angrily. "I'm going to leave you with a friend of mine for a while, just until I return."

"You're not serious." Emma stated, not believing that he would leave her like that. "I am. I just need you to be safe." Killian told her. "So you're just going to leave me?" Emma frowned, she didn't think he would ever abandon her, but it felt like he was. "No Emma, I'm not leaving for good, I'll come back for you, I promise." Emma shook her head. "You can't guarantee that. If you're going, then I am too. Together, or not at all." Emma said with pure determination.

"I just want to keep you safe." Killian explained with a defeated sigh. "I know, but I can take care of myself. Besides, I have you with me." She looked him in the eyes once she sat closely next to him, making sure he knew she was serious. Killian knew he wasn't going to win this argument, or any argument with Emma. She was too stubborn, even more so than himself. Regrettably, he gave in, seeing no other choice without completely destroying their relationship.

Killian feared what the lost boys would do if they found the infamous Captain Hook had a weak spot. They were ruthless, and although they looked like children, they were more like demons. The leader being Peter Pan, the worst of them all. Emma had no idea how evil and twisted he was. He also didn't want to face the fact that Emma would find out he was lying to her about his and Milah's relationship in the past. He just didn't have the courage to tell her, for fear of her leaving him because he was once in love with Milah. He didn't know if he could say he was in love with her anymore; he had never felt the way he did about Emma with her. Emma never knew about his quest for vengeance, and he intended to keep it that way for now. She would probably run a mile if she knew what he was like before she came along. He would tell her eventually, when he felt she could take it.

If he told her, he just knew he wouldn't be able to take it, seeing that look of fear in her eyes, even worse; fear of him. He was surprised at how understanding she was whenever he avoided her questions about his past. She never got upset or angry at him for not sharing his secrets with her. She could tell it was uncomfortable for him, and never pushed any further. He honestly didn't think he deserved her. And she certainly deserved better than him. Alas, he was far too selfish to ever willingly give her up. He concluded that he was never letting go of her, ever.