depreciation they claim

My exhausted month

The older I get, the farther I fall into my thoughts. I used to think mental illness was made up. Some gay shit a sensitive kid told his mommy and dad when he wanted something in return from the world of God or anything.

I'm fucking naive for thinking that.

I thought I was safe from that whole downer attitude with an ego the size of the earth.
I'm essentially perfect.
Maybe it was karma, even though I never really believed in the thing, makes sense. I don't see myself as imperfect now, anymore. I was really low at one point, there's a whole teenage sob story of how I got messed up in the first place, but it'd just make me feel like another basket case and some kid on the internet saying their life sucks and the world owes them something.
Sound familiar?

I get so tired so easily. I'm tired now, I'm tired after waking up from a rare night of uninterrupted sleep. I'm tired of looking on the mirror some times, hardly, but still.
I'm tired of myself some times though. Sometimes I feel like two people split in half. It's because I don't get out much.
Of my head, that is.

I love arguing and tormenting and teasing and thinking and being spiteful but I do it to myself too much. Am I sadistic? Probably. But I'm also a masochist.
Now you're in my head too. Look what you made me do.