The Hunger Games- What If's (Fan Fiction)

Chapter Fourteen

   It's my turn. I wipe my eyes, just to make sure that I'm not crying. I cautiously step onto the platform that will take me up to the stage. I think of Prim's shirt tail that made her look like a duck. I think of how I feel in the woods. I think of Gale calling me 'Catnip'. I let myself believe that the world is okay and I'll be fine. I manage to smile just as the stage lights first hit me.

   I walk down to where Ceaser is briskly, passing  my little 'enterauge' as I do so. Ceaser greets me with a kiss on the cheek and tells me to spin for him, just as he did at the first interviews. I do and note that he changed his theme colour from the beautiful dark blue to a more gentle robin's egg blue that suits him much better in my opinion.

   Ceaser tells me that I look lovely and tells me to twirl. I do just that, just like the first interview . . . when Peeta was still beside me. . . .

   I feel my smile slightly falter. I look down at my feet and twirl again before I tip to one side. I giggle as Ceaser helps me steady myself again.

   "Now, why don't we sit down then, eh?" Ceaser asks. The audience laughs and I do, too. I let him lead me to where I sit for the montage of the Games.

   I sigh and think how Peeta could be next to me. I know that I can't do this alone. I'm too afraid to face the truth, I know I can't. But I must, for the sake of my district. For the sake of Prim, Gale, my mother, Peeta, Haymitch, and everyone else. I must be strong; there's no other option.

   Before the lights dim and the crowd reduces to a deathly quiet, Ceaser asks some simple questions and adds in his own light jokes. I spot Cinna in the crowd looking up at me and I flash him my first real smile since I set foot on this stage.

   Cinna smiles back and before I know it, the lights are dimming. A wave washes over the crowd, muffling their chattering of nonsense and giggles. I turn my direction toward the giant screen in front of me and Ceaser slowly backs away.

   There we are, Peeta and I walking hand in hand. I smile rather sheepishly as I look up at him again. I feel my eyes starting to prickle with tears, but I won't cry yet. There's still so much more to come. . . .

   The next several minutes go by painfully slowly as I watch everyone die. It's down to twelve tributes. Some more die off, and then . . . then it's Rue.

   There I am, singing the Valley Song, holding Prim's hand, staring into her eyes. It's too much; I had to let a tear fall down my cheek, leaving behind a hot trail of saltwater. I know there's worse to come, and I can feel the cameras on me now. They're probably wondering why I'm crying, but they weren't there. They didn't hear all of our conversations, they didn't know how much we wanted to protect each other. She was my ally, that much they should respect.

   The image on the screen changes, and I take note that they didn't show the 'Flower Incident'. By this time, I know it's coming. The worst part.

   As soon as the screen shows Peeta covered in dirt, hiding in the mud, I lose it. I smile up at him while tears stream down my face. I look away from the screen; I notice that they brought down the volume on the background music so you can hear our conversation. It was that special night in the cave.

   Everyone in the room had already seen this before, but that didn't stop the 'ooh' and 'ahh' sounds from coming out of their mouths. I blush nervously from the inside of my trembling hands that cover my face as I listen to Peeta's sweet voice. Had I really not loved him? Maybe it's only because he's gone. I can't help but feel that I could have learned to love him though.

   All too soon, that sequence is over. Then come the deaths, myself running for the medicine, Peeta's death. I can't seem to pull me face away for this part. The tears linger on my face for so long before they drop into my lap, they turn cold upon my cheeks. I can feel thousands of eyes on me, but it didn't matter. Nothing did except the screen.