Don't Go [Muke Clemmings]

Chapter Thirty Three

A/N: well idk how much I'm going to have left bc what I've been planning this entire time seems like it'll take longer than I thought. Definitely a few chapters left
If I ever get this published I'm definitely going to take some of the filler out bc there is so much of it I'm way too full

3 months and 29 days

Michael

Here it was. My 18th birthday. Whoopdie fûcking do.

Most people would be really excited for it, but I knew my fate. Except I didn't know what people got me as birthday presents. I made sure to skip over that part because birthday presents are good surprises. I didn't want my death to be a surprise.

"Happy birthday, Michael!" everybody shouted as I walked into the room. I was old enough now to do things on my own, yet my mom decided that a surprise party like people often held for 10 year olds was appropriate.

"Yay!" I said sarcastically, but smiled so that they would also  know I appreciated their presence. And their presents. I know my humor isn't the best, but you know what? I don't care. I had survived 18 years, and that was a miracle for me.

I especially appreciated my mom for decorating this place all by herself, and making it look beautiful even with the small amount of money we had.

"Happy birthday, Mikey!!!" Luke yelled in my face, making me scream like a girl, which in turn, made him laugh, smiling so wide I could see his dimple. I loved when he smiled like this, for two reasons: for one thing, it was beautiful, and it also showed that he was truly happy, and that was the best thing I could hope for.

Luke was my only friend. You know, the third thing I put on my list almost ten years ago, that I thought was so impossible? One day, I was just getting my things from my locker, and he ran up to me and hugged me. I had never met the kid before in my life, but I talked to him instead of assuming he was a rapist and running away, and that turned out to be the best decision I had made in my life.

Of course you know this already. Am I feeling deja vu?

"Present time!" my mom shouted. Everybody gathered around the table and she handed me a paper bag from Savemart. "Open this one first."

"Mom, you didn't have to get me a present," I whispered, giving her a look. I knew that we didn't even have enough money to pay this month's rent.

"Yes, Michael, I did." She didn't know I knew why she was being so nice. My doctor really didn't have a quiet voice, I had heard them talking from two rooms away.

"I love you," I told her, wrapping my arm around her shoulder.

"You know I love you too, right?" I nodded. "Good, don't ever forget it."

"Come on, open your presents!" Luke said, chuckling, but he had an uneasy look on his face. I knew exactly why, but I felt like I wasn't supposed to...

I opened the bag to see another diary. "I saw you writing in yours the other day, and you were almost to the end."

Will... Not... Cry...

I hugged her tighter than ever before. She knew that I didn't need this. I'd had a doctor's appointment three days before and he said I had less than 6 months. She knew that I was already dead.

"Mine next!" Luke squealed, handing me a small box. For some reason I was picturing a guy giving a girl a box of chocolates or jewelry on Valentine's day. The image made me smile, as depressed as I was.

I unwrapped the box and my eyes widened at what he had given me.

An iPhone. It was like he knew. And... I never put that list in my diary.

"You told me you've never had one of these, right? Well, here you go." He smiled, and I hugged him, making him laugh as he wrapped his strong arms around me as well. I bit my lip and tried not to cry.

+++++

"Luke, I need to talk to you."

"Yes? Did you like your present?" He smiled as wide as he could, though it wasn't as wide as I'd seen him smile in the past.

"I did. I don't know where you got that money. I don't want to know. And I don't want to feel guilty about it. I have something important to say and you're not going to make me forget it by showing me how much you'd do for me."

"Michael, where is this going?" His smile slowly faded. As fake as it was in the first place, it appeared he just couldn't keep it up.

"We need to break up. I don't... I'd rather break your heart a little bit now than break it a lot then."

"No, no, no, what you're doing is breaking it a lot now and then breaking it a lot again when you die. I don't see how it's better."

"Find someone else. I'll still be here. We can still be friends if you're willing to even be near me."

3 months 20 days

I miss him. He's still friends with me but he's seemed distant, and I don't think he's even trying to find someone else. It's not worth it to get back together, though.

I have a friend. I've fallen in love. I've unfortunately made someone fall in love with me. I ran 5 miles. I have an iPhone, for the next few months.

I've filled out my list. I'm ready to die.

A/N: Michael has had some memories involving his 18th birthday party before (chapter 2), but there are some minor differences...
- <3 morgan <3