Wish We Could Turn Back Time m.c

Chapter 4

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Slowly but steadily, Al and I were becoming better and better friends. We would casually chat on the way to school, wave to one another if we crossed paths in the hallways, and lately he had even been sitting outside with me at the picnic tables during lunch. Charlotte hadn't been back to bother me in awhile either, but I knew she would. She always did as soon as I was starting to feel better.

While it was nice to have a real life friend that I could touch and see and feel and actually talk to for once, Jasmine and I were still closer than Al and I would ever be. Even though I couldn't see her in person, there were so many other ways of communicating that it almost didn't matter. Besides, Jasmine understood me more than anyone I'd met in real life ever had. One day, I finally decided that the two of us were close enough to exchange phone numbers. I asked Jasmine when we were DMing in Twitter.

@CurrentlyMuke: sure, u can have my phone number as long as u promise to get SLFL tickets :P

@TwentyOneSecondsOfSummer: I'm serious. You're literally my best friend and I want ur number so we can text and stuff even when I don't have wifi.

@CurrentlyMuke: I know! Ugh u can never take a joke. Of course I wanna text you! Ya know, let's even FaceTime!

We exchanged numbers and shortly after I got a text from my newly made contact.

Jasmine: so about those concert tickets...

Attached was a link. I tapped on it, and it led me to a website that was hosting an art contest. And the reward was two front row tickets to the Sounds Live Feels Live show in Sydney! However, my optimism began to fade when I started to look at some of the other entries.

Lacey: how come u sent me that random link?

Jasmine: so u can enter and get us some 5sos tickets! Duh!

Lacey: my crappy art will not win us the tickets

Jasmine: oh please. I've seen the art u post on twitter and you're an amazing artist. U have as good as a shot as anyone else. Better, even.

Lacey: you're only saying that cause we're friends and u don't wanna hurt my feelings

Jasmine: no. I'm saying it cause you're a good artist. Ask anyone else!

Lacey: u know very well that I have no one else to ask

Jasmine: how about that friend u keep talking about. Al?

Lacey: u want me to show my drawings to Al?

Jasmine: yes.

Lacey: ya know, maybe I will just to prove u wrong

Jasmine: good. Cause maybe you'll listen to him as then you'll enter and we can get us some ticks :P

Lacey: fat chance. I'm tired, good night Jasmine <3

Jasmine: bye love. I'll FaceTime u this weekend.

That night, I fell asleep wondering what would happen if I actually did show my art to Al. I wanted to, and yet I didn't want to. He'd probably think my drawings are weird and disturbing. If tried so hard to keep this one real life friendship, and I didn't want to screw it up by showing him things from my personal life. Then again, if Al was as nice as he seemed, maybe he wouldn't care about the things I draw. Maybe he'd accept me for me, like Michael did once.
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Michael's POV
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Paying attention to all the negative things in my life is probably a large part of the reason why I struggle with depression. Even with this knowlege, I couldn't stop myself from scrolling through all those comments on Twitter and paying attention to all those hate comments that stick out at me.

Ugly. Weird. Freak. Attention-seeking. The ugly one in the band.

"Michael? How are you still awake? It's like, three thirty in the morning," I heard Calum say in the bed next to me. He obviously saw the light coming from my phone.

"Just scrolling through Twitter. Couldn't sleep," I replied trying to sound nonchalant.

"Hey, stop reading all those comments and things. And the negative articles that websites write. You know what they do to you," I couldn't see his expression through the dark of our hotel room but his voice sounded concerned.

"I'm not reading the negative things, Calum," I lied.

"Whatever you say. You're important to this band Michael, that's what matters. Now go to bed. We've got a long day ahead of us tomorrow," he rolled over and went back to sleep. Grudgingly, I put my phone on charge and tried to sleep as well. I knew if I was all exhausted and depressed in the morning, the other boys would know something was up.

It was times like these when I wished I had my old childhood friend, Lacey Palmer. She was the only one who ever really seemed to understand me, besides the guys in the band of course. Luke, Calum, and Ashton were my best friends. My brothers, even. But there was just always something missing ever since I left Sydney and that something was Lacey. There was something about her that I couldn't quite put my finger on that always made me feel happy no matter what. I should have never lost contact with that girl. At the time, I was too wrapped up in my own selfish thoughts and now it was too late. I'd probably never be able to find her again. I didn't even know if she still lived in Sydney.
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"Michael, are you okay? You look like you've just been run over by a truck," Was the first thing Luke said to me the next morning. We were all hopping into the van on the way to do a few radio interviews while we were here in the UK and obviously, my plan to get some sleep and not look too wiped out in the morning didn't work.

"I'm fine. Was just up too late with too much internet," I couldn't suppress a yawn.

"Hey, you don't need to be all over those articles and the Twitter comments like you were a few months ago. You know what it did to your mental health," Ashton reprimanded me through a mouthful of Vegemite covered toast.

"Guys cool out! I am twenty years old, I can handle myself on the internet," I pouted like the toddler that I was while the boys continued to tell me how great of a guy I am and how I'm like their brother and how they love my blue hair and blah blah blah.

I don't need them babying me. The negative things don't get to me. Im Michael Gordon Clifford, rock star. I'm fine, aren't I?
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Whoa, that chapter was a little more emotional than I intended it to be. Sorry for attacking your feels.

But yay! 5sos is in the story!

Just pretend they have already started the UK leg of t SLFL tour.

Comment your thoughts! SabyJo loves comments!!!!!!!

Thanks for reading. <3

-SJ