Blinded

Chapter 6: Love is Problematic

"Izaya...did you love me..?"

---

Izaya gazed out to a direction where he supposed was the window, feeling cold breeze of air hitting his pale skin and attempting to calm his mind.

His eyes remained empty despite the quivering soul hidden beneath it, staring only into a wide field of darkness as he slowly let the words sunk in.

Shizuo was bold enough to ask him such personal and hurtful question; making the raven flinch upon hearing his words.

---

"What the hell, Shizu-chan?!"

He shouted in reply with emotions he didn't knew existed within him. He was hurt, sad, humiliated, flustered and in fear of the topic so he refused to believe the words actually came out of the protozoan's mouth.

Refusal hit him more when Shizuo repeated the question, slowly allowing himself to make assumptions on the smaller male.

"What makes you think that way, you beast?!"

Shizuo seemed hurt at the words, yet he couldn't comprehend why. He knew about the intense feeling of hatred they shared the moment their eyes met, but he was nowhere near loving the raven even up till now.

Or was he?

He shook his head involuntarily, erasing the thoughts away. He was just making sure if what he said was true; that's all.

Slowly he reached out to pet Izaya on the head. Just as when he was about to lower his hand on the silky raven hair, Izaya pushed his hand away even with his blindness still existed.

"Don't get me wrong, Mr. But you're not allowed to touch me especially when you decided to ignore my questions,"

He gave him a deadly glare even with the empty eyes staring slightly to the blonde's side. Izaya was high on guard even with one of his five senses was taken away from him.

This startled the blonde and he didn't know how to react. He had never seen Izaya in such a state before. He seemed furious, sad and hurt all at once, yet Shizuo still had no idea of the things he should have done to make him feel better.

Not that he wanted to see him feel better, he just wanted the old annoying pest back at him; also returning them to the days where none of their current relationship mattered.

Where only hatred stood high in between them.

"I'll leave you for a while to sort things out,"

The blonde finally spoke in his unusually calm voice, making Izaya grunt in frustration before finally pointing somewhere he thought was the door.

"Then out!"

For a few moments the only thing surrounded them was silence. But once he heard the door's clicking sound, he knew at once that the blonde was finally out.

He collapsed to himself, sighing deeply as the tears spilled out from his now blinded crimson orbs.

---

Sighing again, he felt the breeze slowly settled into a halt. His hair slightly misplaced but that didn't mask his current feeling.

He had been thinking about what the blonde said. Izaya had never let himself being degraded to a state where he would cry in front of his own nemesis, but he was on the way to make it happen and he didn't like it one bit.

He didn't love that monster.

There was only hatred between the two of them, not more or less than that.

Or was there more to come?

Inhaling deeply he allowed himself to rest, closing his eyes as he laid back on his pillow. He didn't want to think about it for the meantime. One part of him was denying the blonde but the other part agreed with his words.

Deciding to not interfere with the thoughts anymore, he let himself drift off to a restless slumber.