The promise

part 34*

We stand in silence for what felt like eternity. The hurt is written all over his face and it's a reflection of mine. We hurt each other.

"Mira." He finally spoke. "I didn't think you would make it."

"We need to talk." I stood still and he stayed the same.

"You left with him; You chose him over me. Did you spend the night with him?" I knew that's what he wanted to know first. He has a habit of thinking that I will sleep with the next guy that flirts with me. He asked me the same question with more valgular terms at Bonnie house and I was too sad to slap him across the face for thinking so low of me. This time his question boils my blood.

"Do you think I just open my legs for any guy that calls me pretty? Because I did it for you? Hmmm? this isn't your first time asking me this and I am tired of that question and quite frankly it pisses me off." I raised my voice at him.

He runs his hands through his hair "I am your boyfriend and you left wrapped in another guys arm." He spit out in disgust.

"Because you insulted me and try to hit him. I told you he was nobody, a family friend, but no. What do you expect me to do, cry in the arms of the guy who's words brought me pain?"

"I expect you to talk to me. I didn't mean what I said and you Damn well know that."

"What part? The part were you broke up with me or called me a racist? Because it sounded like you meant both." My voice choked up. "You fucking hurt me Mase." I cried, fuck it's embarrasing how much I cry now. He is quick to pull me in an embrace and I melt in his arms. "You hurt me." I cried into his shoulder

"I know baby girl and I am sorry. I didn't mean to." He soothe me. "I was angry. I didn't mean anything of it. Forgive me. It was a terrible thing to say." He soothe me until my tears have calm. He leads me to the leather sofa and I sit down beside him.

"I didn't mean to hurt you Mase. CJ and I are just family friends; we got caught up in dancing. I have no feelings for him, he is simply my family friend. I can see why you are mad at what you walked in on but it was nothing." I try to clear the air of that before we can further our converstaion.

"I want you to know I didn't mean to call you a racist. You are not that Mira." He wipe my tears stain cheeks. "I was hurting and confused as to why you did what you did. I regretted the words the moment they left my mouth. I wish I could take them back. You do so much for me and that was a low blow."

"I did what I did with a good heart. I am not embarrass of you. I did a shitty thing I admit, I thought I was sparing your feeling. Our relationship doesn't just involve us. It involves things that are out of our control like the colour of our skin, our culture.. I love your heart, I love how you make me feel and that's why we are together, but before people see that they are blinded by our colour difference. I know people say it's 2016 and nobody cares, but it's there. I see it in their eyes and their voice. Their disgusting wishper. It's driving me crazy.

"What's been happening at school?"

"Their comments and stares chokes me." My voice trembles unintentionally and I feel like that timid girl back in grade eight. "I can ignore them, but I still see it and it sticks. It doesn't make me love you any less, it just fills me with hurt and I swear any mintues now I will punch someone."

"No punching anyone babe....I haven't been there for you." He wishper through pain. I don't want him to blame himself.

"You have been more than there for me. I just shut you out of that part. It's a habit to only let people see what I want them to see. To suffer in silence."