Our Monsters

What If

("I Am" by Awolnation)

Bellamy and Clarke sat in front of the screen.  Jaha was speaking, glaring at Bellamy.  Hunter's stomach flipped, she hoped he didn't look at her like that.

She paced back and forth behind them, chewing nervously on her lip.   She would have to speak to her parents soon.   The last time she saw them, her mother had been crying over her departure and her father was more than happy to see her leave.

There was a pain in her chest and she rubbed her hand over her heart. She loved her dad, she just wanted him to love her the way he used to. When she was little, he used to tell her that he would never love anyone as much as her... Looks like that was a lie.

But now she had a chance to talk to them and start over.  She would be able to to say they had gotten through it.  

"Bellamy Blake, you are pardoned of your crimes." Jaha spoke leaning forward to give them the full effect.

Clarke and Bellamy looked back at Hunter, smiles on their faces. She rubbed her hands together and smiled back.   Bellamy was pardoned for his sins, but would she be pardoned for hers now that Wells was dead?  Did she deserve to be pardoned?

She didn't think so.

But she had so much to lose now.  She had to look after the kids, and Octavia needed her, and she just got Raven back, Clarke needed help, and Bellamy...

"Hunter, it's time that we talk." She heard Jaha say.

It was muffled, her heartbeat was the only thing she could hear.   She took a step back, muscles screeching at her to run.

Bellamy grasped her clammy hand, pulling her to sit next to him.   He heard her suck in a breath, but didn't hear her exhale.  He leaned toward her, "Breathe."

She let out long breath.  Her eyes looked anywhere, but at Jaha.  She was subconsciously playing with Bellamy's fingers, trying to calm herself.

Jaha cleared his throat, "I think we should speak privately." He looked nervous.

Hunter peered at Clarke and Bellamy, both were trying to assure her it would be fine.  Bellamy moved to stand up, but Hunter wouldn't let go of his hand.

It took her a moment to find her a voice, "Whatever you have to say... can be said with them here."

There was a small smile on Jaha's lips, he was happy she found friends.  "Alright."

Bellamy and Clarke slowly sat back down, glancing at Hunter's clenched jaw.  She nodded to them, telling them it was fine.

"Well, first let's talk about-" Jaha began, but Hunter cut him off.

"Jaha, Wells was my friend," Hunter said hastily, "I tried my best to protect him, but I was blind sided by his death, totally floored.  He was killed by one of our own and then that one died right after.  I tried, I really did." Her chest was heaving.

Jaha was quiet, looking sadly at the girl he sent to protect his only child.  Her face had blanched, sweat pooling at her hairline.

"I know," He smiled softly.

She let out a sigh of relief, her panic was eased with a simple phrase.

"I knew that sending you kids down to Earth was a risk, and like Clarke said before, it was a death sentence." His hand rubbed at his chin. "I knew that there would be losses, I just hoped it wouldn't be..."

"I'm sorry." She apologized again.

"It's fine, Hunter. The others seem to be alive and well; the Exodus ship will be sent down in a few days and that will increase your chances of survival tenfold." Spoken like a true leader.