Chromatic Musings

Forward

I kept
Looking back
For a familiar
Face and voice
That smiled
And cheered me on
It hurt for so long
When I looked back
To see hesitance
And eyes looked away
It pained me
To see my family
Become a fading gray
I yearned and ached
For the golden days
To come again
Full of laughter
And happiness
Empty of fear
But these days
Are sepia
And are stained
With black
And white tears
I used to have
A habit of
Hanging them up
Around my room
Forcing myself
To dwell inside
Misery and sorrow
Making myself
Take pills
That induced
Emptiness
And woe
But now I stagger
And stand
I shake and waver
I tremble
And demand
That I let go
I tell myself
To be brave
To see it as it is
And as it was
I give myself hope
And a hug
I plead that I
Need to cut the tie
I have with the past
To climb out of the
Hole I have dug
In order to smile
In order to be strong
I need to take courage
And separate myself
From the people
Who weren't there
All along
And now I speak
To them
Through bleeding words
And inky veins
I tell them my thanks
A little girl's praise
I give them my love
From a heart that
Was scarred
And whisper again
That if they ever
Want to talk
I will never
Be too far.