#2 Scars Of A Warrior

Chapter 5: Empty

*Erin's pov*

[A month later March 3rd Lexi still hasn't woken up yet I'm getting ready for work when Jay comes up behind me with Andrew he says:]

"Babe can you change him while I get dressed?"

"Don't you see I'm trying to get dressed? Can't you get my mom to change him?"[we start arguing Jay grabs my hand and says:]

"He is our son dammit Erin! You should want to change your own son. I don't know what's going on with you but I'm trying okay?! I'm trying here."

"I'll see you at work. I love you."[I kiss Jay's lips he doesn't kiss back I grab my bags and go to work Hank says:]

"Erin."

"Hey. What's up?"

"Do you know Delilah Anderson?"

"Yea. She was like a sister to me and Nadia when my parents died. She practically lived with us and she even was my babysitter for five years."

"She died in combat yesterday. Brennan will be escorting the body home. The funeral will be next week."

"Okay. Have her parents been notified?"

"Yea. If you need to take time just give me the word."

"Yea."[I go up to intelligence everyone but Kevin is there I say:]"Halstead you're on the beat."

"That is ridiculous."

"Do you have a problem with that?"

"Actually I do."

"Hmm. I don't care. Like I said you're on the beat today."

"Sergeant. All due respect but I don't think I should be put on the beat."

"Give us a minute."

"Yes ma'am."

[Everyone goes downstairs Jay and I go into my office Jay yells at me:]

"I don't know what the hell is going on with you but get it together Erin! I'm sick of it! You won't hold our son but you act like you don't want to be a part of this family then just say it. You've got three days or I'm taking the kids and leaving you. I mean it ; I know that you're scared but that is no reason to be a complete and total bitch to me and everyone else when we are only trying to help!"[Erin is quiet we start yelling back and forth we stand there for ten minutes in silence she finally says:]

"I thought it was just a clogged milk duct. I originally found the lump our last night in the Bahamas I didn't say anything because I didn't want to worry anyone. But you know I thought it was just a clogged milk duct. That's why I've been using formula instead ; it's happened so many times before that I didn't pay any attention to it. I haven't picked up our son in months because he likes to nurse on my left breast and he hates when I try to move him over to the right. I haven't been going to chemo."

"Then where have you been going every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday?"

"To see Lexi. What if she doesn't wake up Jay? I can't lose another child. It was bad enough when Adrianna died ; I need you now more than ever."

"I didn't mean it when I said I was leaving. I just don't want to live without you. You promised me that you would fight."

"Do you remember Delilah Anderson?"

"How could I forget she was Dylan's first babysitter ; Dylan would follow her everywhere hell she adored Delilah. What about her?"

"She died in combat yesterday. Brennan is escorting the body home. The funeral is next week."