Better Games

19. Him

Katniss,
I Never knew how to start this because if I start it it will end. And I'm afraid of the end. There are two ways it could end.

I Never had a way with words and I know the words I scratch onto this paper will never compare to the words lost on their way. I always had a way with weapons though, they were my letters and the pain held my message.

I Never intended that message to be sent to Prim, for that anger to reach you, but you know that, and you know there's no way to take it back.

I Never imagined having to say goodbye without saying it. I imagined winning a war and winning your heart, but—

I Never realized until now that not once were those two dreams dreamt at once. Always separated, because they weren't possible without the other falling apart. And it seems like the war was won right?

I Never want to remember what I've done, and yet we both know we can't forget.

But I Will see you again, if it's alright, because

you Will Never stop being my Katnipp.

I'm sorry,
Gale

I sank to the floor as teardrops stained the already ink smeared letter in places their weren't spots of residue already. A hole in my heart next to so many others I've managed to ignore at the best of times created an all-to-familiar ache. The sound of Peeta humming downstairs and the occasional clashing of a whisk against a metal bowl echoed faintly in the background as my throat swelled up. I clutched the letter to my side. Buttercup raced into the room and stopped abruptly on top of the letter, his paw resting on Prim's name.