【 insomnia 】destiel

☼ day eleven ☼

Dean

I peeled my eyes open, a throbbing headache swarming in after. I turned my head and stared at the wall as i gripped the empty sheets next to me.

Its been weeks since Cas left, and i still expect to see him in my arms when i wake up, but he never is. I looked down and saw the stuffed bee in the corner of the bed tilting slightly as it sat there collecting dust. I closed my eyes again as a shaken sigh escaped my lips.

I miss him..

I jumped off the top bunk and stood up, my headache growing as i tried to rub it away. Nothing Advil wont fix.. I thought as i made my way to the bathroom, kicking a few empty bottles out of the way.

I reached for the mirror and opened it to reveal a set of pills, bandaids, and tubes of toothpaste. I reached for the Advil in the far back and took a few if those, praying it would take the pain away. I closed the mirror and padded back to my bed, not really planning on doing anything today but mope and feel like shit.

I felt so bad when Cas left that night, and i couldn't get the image of him out of my mind. "Im so sorry Castiel." I sighed into my hands out loud. "Im sorry for what i did, please just.. just come back.." I felt my throat tighten as i swallowed deeply.

Here i was talking to no one but myself, probably sounding crazy, but i didn't care. I just needed to say it out loud without anyone judging me.

I reached for my phone for the usual check-up on Cas, even though he never replied, i still texted him just to make sure. I quickly unlocked it and typed a quick message to let him know how I'm doing.

Hey Cas, its me again.. I just checking in to make sure your okay. Its been slow sense you left.. I um.. I miss you. I don't know if you are reading these, but i hope you can come back soon. Um.. Be safe Castiel.

I sighed shutting my phone off as i tossed it next to me just as i heard a knock at the door.

I jumped down again and fixed my hair slightly as i reached for the knob, opening it to see a dude leaning in the door frame, a cigarette between his teeth. "Hey, Dean right?" He smiled darting his jet black eyes up and down my frame with a nod. "Yes, can i help you?" I asked rolling my eyes as i crossed my arms. "Friend said this is your place.. Theres a mid-semester celebration thing later, you should come, after all, you have been missing out on all the parties." He hummed as he biting at his lips, jaw clenching slightly.

I scanned his appearance and smiled slightly as i un-crossed my arms. "What time, and who's going to be there?" I raised a brow as he leaned up from the door, standing at my height. "Well ill be there, and its at 7. You really should come." He winked, his cigarette handing from his lips.

I thought for a moment as i watched him turn his head to glance down the hall, his jaw sharp as his neck stood out of his leather jacket. He wore a loose white shirt underneath that, and a pair of faded jeans and boots. He practically screamed 'greaser'

and he was friggin hot.

"Yeah.. Ill go." I sighed as i leaned on the door to watch as he turned back to me, a smile on his tan face. "Great, see you then Dean, I'm Dallas by the way.." He winked as he clicked his tongue before puffing out a drift of his cig, smoke seeping out of his lips.

I smirked and closed the door, releasing a deep breath i didn't know i was holding in. "Dallas.." I thought out loud as i planned on what time i would leave tonight.

________

Castiel

"Alright, love you too.. Bye." I hung up the phone with a small smile as i let it rest on my lips. "Was that Macaroni whats-her-face?" A cocky voice called from behind, making me roll my eyes.

"Her names Max, and yes that was her, could you mind your own business for a few seconds Gabriel?" I sassed back as he threw himself on the couch right besides me, throwing an arm over my shoulders with a sigh. "Look, Cassie-" "Castiel." I interrupted him, narrowing my eyes as he rolled his."Castiel, i know this whole dating this isn't working for ya so why bother? You just met this girl and your throwing the 'L-bomb' like its nothing." Gabriel glanced around the room as he spoke, a somewhat serious tone in his voice.

"So what, i can date who i want, and i definitely meant what i said." I replied crossing my arms as he let out a groan. "Yeah, sure, and I'm the president of the united states." He scoffed back as he tilted his head at me. "Be honest with me Cas, do you really love her?" He asked with a slight frown on his face.

Honestly...No.

"Yes... And stay out of my love life Gabe!" I shouted as i started to get up, but he grabbed my wrist quickly. "Cas, i know you told me not to talk about Him, but your just making yourself worse.. You need to work this out. I know your trying to ignore him, but its not going to help, none of this is going to help.." He explained as i yanked my hand away, my stance held high.

"I didn't ask for your advice, and stay out of my love life!" I snapped turning to walk away with a swollen feeling in my throat. "Whatever dude, but I'm just telling you the truth, i know you love dean-"

The rest was muffled as i quickly shoved my hands over my ears, not wanting to hear anymore of the nonsense spilling from his mouth. I soon slipped into the guest bedroom where I've been staying these days, all under the comfort of my older brothers home.

I let out a shaken breath as i leaned on the closed door, my hands coming up to my face as i felt my eyes sting at the ends. "He's right.." I muttered feeling a few tears slip out as i slowly slid down the door.

Once i hit the ground, tears flooded my vision as i started to sob silently to myself. "Im such an idiot." I muttered between breaths as i curled up into a ball, letting my emotions spill down my cheeks as i heard footsteps approaching.

A few hesitant knocks came after, along with a soothing voice. "Can i come in?" Was all Gabriel asked before i opened the door slightly, moving away from its frame as he entered in a swift motion.

I felt warms arms embrace me and i took no time to hug him back, letting my feeling get the best of me as i started to cry on his shoulder. "Tell me whats going on, and don't lie Castiel. Just let it out, im here for you." Gabe explained as he started to run his hands through my hair.

"I miss him Gabriel, i miss him so damn much.." I arched my back as i quietly choked out sentences left and right. "I want him back, i want to go back to him, but what if he cheats on me? I cant trust him." I tightened my grip on his shirt as he nodded silently, taking in all the information.

Gabe pulled away and placed his hand on my shoulders as he spoke. "I know you love him Castiel, theres no doubt in that, but if you love him, then you need to trust him too, thats what makes a healthy relationship." He explained wiping my eyes slightly with a sigh.

"I hate to see you like this man, and if that means i have to do something about it, then i will." He narrowed his honey like eyes and griped my shoulders tightly as i nodded in response. "No, i don't want you involved with this.. I should do it myself." I wiped my nose as i let out a deep sigh, glancing my eyes around before bringing them back to my brother. "What should i tell him?"

Gabriel shrugged and stood up, his hand out stretched to mine. "Just tell him how you feel, face to face." I nodded in response as i tried to plan out what i would say or do.

"Hey don't you need your meds anyway? Might as well pick them up while your spilling your heart out to Dean." Gabe smiled hitting my shoulder slightly, a laugh escaping his lips. "Yeah i guess your right.. I can go later tonight." I smiled faintly as he nodded in response.

"Sounds like a plan, you better not mess this up, i can hear your church bells from here." Gabe smiled wildly as he imitated wedding bells loudly. I shoved him out the door slightly with a laugh as he started to sing.

I smiled to myself as i walked over to my bed, my thoughts planning out every situation that could go down tonight.

I just hope its not to late..