#326 in Humor
A hilarious warped parody of our favorite childhood story, The Wizard of Oz, but what really is a story without our dear orange skinned racist bigot, Donald Trump?
*extended summary inside*
-UNEDITED
-written in early 2016
This is the longest chapter I've updated under this book so far, and hopefully it will help you find patience for the next one 😂
•••
As strong as a lion, as smooth as a fox..." chanted Khaled as they crawled through the dusty vents of Trump's mansion.
"Wait, is that from Mulan?" Asked Simon from behind him. "That's not even correct! Is it?" He added to Pansy, who shrugged in response.
"I'LL MAKE A MAN OUT OF YOU!!!" Khaled sang in a sudden crescendo, sound waves shaking the vent.
"Shut up, you bloody sod! You're going to make them catch us!" Simon stage whispered, pinching the Dj's left butt cheek harshly.
"Ow! You never appreciate me!"
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"I'd appreciate you jumping into an active volcano."
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Khaled growled ferociously, his hairs standing on end as he belted out, "LIONNNN!" A fart left his rectum, and instantaneously the grumpy Tv personnel (or whatever) collapsed with a thud.
Simon had borne the brunt of the malicious attack, what with his face being barely ten inches away from Khaled's butt and all while Pansy was left to inhale leftovers. The boy struggled to maintain consciousness as black dots danced in his vision and his life flashed before his eyes. His voice was slurred when he spoke, "Where's Kylie?" Upon the realization of the lack of a female head within close proximity of his bottom. Damnit!
"Made her distract the guards; might as well put that plastic surgery of hers to good use, am I right? Hehehee."
"Right..." Pansy said disdainfully, dreaming about a fantasy that should have been, if not for Khaled and his meddling mouth!
They continued to clamber through the tight space, pushing Simon's limp body roughly. With a sudden halt, his head slammed across the metal with a clang.
"Mummy, five more minutes..." Moaned Simon as he snuggled himself closer and sucked on his thumb.
Khaled slapped him disgustedly and looked through the slits of the vent, annoyed. "So we are looking for a vibrator, which is likely to be in a room; a bedroom; Trump's bedroom. How we supposed to even know where that hag's bedroom is?! It's not like we've been in Trump's house before! We ain't even got a map or something!"
