A Day (Vikkstar123/Sidemen Fanfiction)

Chapter 9

Simon's POV

'This has been such a crazy day. I feel like I'm going to fall asleep on the spot, this is so odd.' Sophie's voice followed him into the cold, the sun having set long ago; the moon hidden behind a thick layer of clouds. Simon frowned at her comment, wondering what she meant about it being odd that she was tired. He voiced his concern as they walked towards his car, and when she didn't immediately reply, he turned to face her, moving backwards slowly to match her pace. 'I don't know, I guess I just don't sleep that well. Never have to be honest. Not sure why, nothing I do or take seems to have any effect. I can feel tired, but there's always a part of me that's full of energy and it never seems to die down. It's quite annoying actually.' This girl gets weirder by the minute, I swear... Simon pondered. This time he kept his thoughts to himself however, not wanting to ruin her seemingly good mood, even though he felt as if the conversation was doing a good enough job on its own. 

'At least uni gives you a schedule to keep yourself on, I don't know what time zone I'm in right now. I feel like its midday according to my sleep pattern at the moment. This is the first time, not including the night before last, that I've actually left the house in nearly two weeks. God that makes me sound like such a hermit. YouTube life, man.' Sophie laughed. 

'Aw poor Simon.' She teased as they reached his car. He unlocked it and they got in, his hand immediately finding the heating dial and whacking it up. 

'Hey, it's hard you know. You're constantly on the grind, working to get the right videos made, edited and uploaded by the right time; it's just a pressure that's always there. Don't get me wrong, I love it. I just feel like there's always more I can do, more I can add to a video edit, more games to play, more series to start, and no matter what I do I can't seem to get any closer to this, this unachievable goal.' His tone had turned serious, the words tumbling out of his mouth surprising him as much as they did the girl sat in his passenger seat. 'Sorry, I didn't mean to unload on you there. I didn't even realise I was thinking that until I said it. Shit.'

He risked a glance at Sophie, meeting her eyes when he found she was already looking at him, her expression unreadable. He was beginning to notice she was good at hiding her thoughts. 'I seem to have this effect on people that makes them want to confess all their deepest darkest secrets to me, even the ones they don't know they're keeping. I mean sure, I don't mind you telling me this, I won't breathe a word to anyone else, it's your business. However, not being very experienced in the world of YouTube, spending most of my time on the viewers end, not the creators, I don't see how I can advise you on what to do to improve your content or whatever. 

What I can do is say this: while on the one hand knowing you can improve your work is a good thing, as it gives you an incentive to continue what you're doing, other than the fact that as you said, you love it, it can also be dangerous. You can end up becoming obsessed with bettering yourself, reaching for perfection when in reality it's unattainable. No-one's perfect, Simon; we all have our flaws, but its about how we see those flaws, and how we work with them that makes us who we are. Its what makes us human. People are going to support you no matter what you do. Well, maybe not if you decide to go Sam Pepper on us, but that's beside the point. Find a medium that you're comfortable with, and don't forget to take time out. You can get so wrapped up in what you're doing that you forget we're not monsters. We do take into consideration that it is your career and you can do what you want with it, even though it is kind of based around what we want as a fan base. You can't please everyone. Once you accept that, I think you'll be fine. It takes a while for people like us to realise that fact, but once we do, it allows us to reach our full potential. God now I sound weird. Go forth, young Jedi, fulfil your destiny.' 

Simon chuckled. 'You're a real philosopher. Thanks.' He gave her a small smile, before starting the car and pulling out of the driveway.

'I think I've spoken more in the last two days than I have all year. You guys will be the death of me, I can just tell.' Sophie's jovial voice lightened the heavy air that had settled after his strange confession.