Chapter 4

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As they hand me my diploma and shake my hand, all I feel is joy. In a few weeks, I'll be leaving for college and leaving all of this behind. But I'll also be leaving my family behind. And Tyler, my conscience adds. He's a dick but we do have history. It's going to be hard to leave everybody.

My parents invited Tyler and Steven's family out for dinner with us. They don't know I'm leaving the state for college yet because I've only just decided which one to go to. But I don't know how to tell them.

At the restaurant, Steven and I sit beside each other. His parents beside him, mine beside me. Next to my parents are Tyler's parents. And finally, Tyler sits between his parents and his aunt and uncle, Steven's parents - across from us. "I'm going to the restroom." I tell my mom.

She nods and I excuse myself from the table. When I leave the bathroom, Tyler is waiting by the door. "Why didn't you text me back?" He asks.

I furrow my eyebrows. "I haven't been on my phone today. Why? What did you want?"

"I wanted to know if you wanted to hangout tonight."

"I'm not fucking with you anymore." I snap. "I'm not going to be another one of your little toys."

"Why? You seem to enjoy yourself every time I come over."

I shake my head. "You're an idiot."

"Maybe. But I want you."

"Then ask me out." I challenge.

He shakes his head. "Hell no."

"Why not?"

"Because you girls believe in making love. I fuck. Girls love me." He shrugs.

"What is wrong with you?" I ask in disbelief.

He sighs, crossing his arms over his chest. "I don't do relationships. You know that." He replies, shrugging slightly.

I have two choices: I can walk away and never look back, meaning I lose Tyler or I can forget anything ever happened and allow him to continue walking all over me and I could save our friendship.

Either way, I'd be the one getting hurt.

"Then I don't 'do' this friendship anymore. Goodbye Tyler."

I push past him and make my way back over to the table. I keep to myself for the rest of dinner until my parents bring up college. "Are the boys going to college?" My dad asks.

Their parents shrug. "We're not sure." Steven's dad replies. "He's considering community college."

"Ty is thinking about that as well." Tyler's mom says. "What about Mia?"

My mom smiles at me. "Our baby is going to Stanford."

"What?" Steven and Tyler both say at once.

"It was between the universities here and Stanford. She chose California." My dad says proudly.

I smile shyly. They begin talking about California and I couldn't be happier when my parents announced it was time to go. I hug everyone but Tyler goodbye and feel a pang in my heart as I walk away from him.

*************************

All of my clothes and important things are packed and ready for my flight. I take off at nine tonight but I have to be there an hour early. Plus it takes half an hour to get to the airport so I am going crazy making sure I have everything. I only have a few hours until we have to leave and I stand in my room, looking around.

I haven't showed much emotion lately because I'm not sure which one to show. I'm mad at how things went with Tyler. I'm sad that I'm leaving my parents, family, and friends. But I'm also excited about going to Stanford. It's my dream school. I've wanted to go ever since I was little. But things are happening so fast, I'm not sure how to feel.

When I hear the door open, I go to the stairs to see who's coming. Much to my surprise it's Steven. "Steven. What are you doing here?" I ask.

"You think I'd let you leave without saying goodbye?" He smiles.

"Aww."

"Plus, my mom made me." He chuckles.

I laugh and playfully punch him. "You're a loser. Is your whole family here?"

He nods, holding up his swim trunks. "Yeah. We're going swimming before you leave so put your bikini on."

"Okay. You change out here and I'll change in the bathroom."

When my bikini is on, I struggle to tie it tight so I hold it to my chest and open the bathroom door. I step out with my back facing towards him. "Can you tie this real quick?" I ask.

He quickly ties it then puts his hands on my hips. I glance back in confusion to find Tyler wearing only his swim trunks. I shake my head before walking away. He follows me all the way out to the pool where I dive into the deep end. "Why didn't you tell me you were leaving?" Tyler asks when I resurface.

I glance at Steven who continues to play with the diving toys. "It's not important." I shrug.

"Not important?" He huffs. "You're leaving for four years. I think it's pretty damn important, don't you think?"

I splash him in irritation. "Get over yourself, will you? We are not friends so stop pretending you actually care about me."

"But we are friends and I do care about you." He says. "Why else would I be talking to you right now?"

"Because you feel obligated. Because your mom made you come. Because you feel bad – I don't know. All I know is that you stopped caring about me the moment you looked at me like you look at all of those other girls." My bottled-up emotions are wanting to explode right now so I stop talking.

"How?" He asks. I stare at him in confusion. "How did I look at you?"

I bite my lip. "Like I was just another one of your prey that you were gonna take home that night. And you know what's crazy?" I ask in exasperation. "For a second, I actually thought you liked me. But then I remembered what you had just made me... one of your toys. I was just like all of those other girls you've hurt. But I'm not gonna be like them and allow you to keep using me." I begin climbing out of the pool. "You're a real piece of shit, Tyler."

That was the last thing I said to him before I took my flight to California.

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