for us | j.b

three .

Emilee's POV

This day felt like it probably would never end. It felt like I was being swallowed into a dark place. I couldn't afford to be in any type of dark place at all. I could not do that, I can't do it to Madison. It's not that I felt myself being dragged into a dark place. It's just the matter of fact that I've been brought back to so many dark memories. It's not like I want to remember them but the longer this drive is, it's almost like I don't have a choice.

Every stop sign, every stop light just brought back something new. I didn't know what to expect. Who to expect. How would I expect myself to be. I'm emotional because I can and because I'm in pain. She was my mother. Someone who brought me pain, but someone I did love throughout all the pain. Yes I am relieved. I don't have to worry anymore, and she no longer had to be in pain.

I didn't put anything black related on Mad. To her it's not a loss, she never met her. Either way she's just a baby and she's going to wear her daily use of onesies.

Justin looked in the mirror in the car to look at me. I could feel his eyes on me as I patted Madison into a deep sleep.

"We're here." He said lowly as he parked the car. I could see everyone except for one person, my father. I sighed as to think that he would have the decency to come to his wife's funeral. Asshole.

Justin carried the car seat with us to the front as to the funeral was outside. I didn't want this funeral to be long. She wasn't even having a wake. It was just this and gone. I didn't plan on anyone mourning my mom too much either. If it affects me like the way it is at this point then I can only imagine how everyone else is. I mean she spent more time with them than she ever did with me.

As the funeral was about to start I noticed someone pull out of a fancy car and I immediately knew it was my father. I just stared at him for a long time. I hadn't seen him in over 2 years I would say. He looked different. Still the same business man, but scarier. He looked like an angrier and cold hearted man. Well then again he was always cold hearted as to him never really being in my life anyways.

I looked down at Madison sleeping peacefully as he passed by me and sat in the front but on the opposite side of me. I could feel his eyes stare at me.

The priest started talking and then Justin held me hand. I looked at him and he gave me a small smile.m, but big enough to help me take a breathe as to see I'd been holding it in.

Halfway into the ceremony Madison woke up and started crying. I picked her up not caring about the looks I was getting. They can all suck it for all I care. I gave her, her pacifier and she went back to being her. Well, actually she was awake and I was happy. She gave me something to be happy about and something to relax about.

I turned to face my father is I felt his eyes stare deep into my soul. I could feel him eyeing Madison. I mean he can't act shocked. Does he not use social media or see magazines? Justin put his arm on my thigh as I suppose he noticed the tension. I smiled back at him.

At the very end of the funeral we were aloud to say our very last good bye. I was the last person to say anything to her and throw my flower down for her. I didn't want to say anything to everyone about her and neither did my father. Shocker? No. By now the tears were spilling with anger not sorrow. I was angry. Why couldn't she just have been a better mother? Why couldn't she just be there for me? Why'd she turn so cold and why'd she give me everything on her will.. Just why?

It was officially over and Justin placed Madison back in her car seat. We were headed back into the car as my name was said.

"Emilee." A deep voice said and I squeezed my eyes as I knew who's voice it was. I sighed and told Justin to just put her in the car while I would regret doing but talk to him. I turned around slowly and I could see anger in his eyes.

"Is that yours?" He said straightforward.

"It is not a that, she has a name." I said clenching my jaw.

"You're 21 years old, you are—." He started but I stopped him.

"Exactly, I'm 21 years old and I can do whatever the fuck I want to." I said clenching my fist and then I felt a sting across my face. That came on shocking to me, but it wasn't the first time I was hit like that. I turned to see Justin angry. I stopped him and told him to watch Madison as to her being alone in an open car.

"Rot in hell." I said turning around but he grabbed my wrist tight.

"You're not even married Camile. How dare you? That boy has nothing good to come. He's just going to leave you." He said.

"Like you left my mother?" I said with no emotion.

"You don't even know the full story." He said.

"And I could care less, now let go of me." I said and he did as I grabbed my wrist to see it red. Whelp, thanks for the bruise.

"That is not yours! You don't deserve that life! You're coming with me to Oregon." He screamed.

"That is my family! And you're right, I don't deserve it. They're both too good for me. But at least she'll have two loving parents. Something neither of you two dead. Now my mothers in the ground and you're next the road you're going along. I could sleep the whiskey a mile away. Stay the hell away from me." I said walking away and he just stood there as his body was nailed to the ground.

Justin grabbed my hand and examined my cheek. He looked at my father and gave him the bird. I brought his hand down and just shook my head to not do it. He knew what was coming for him. Tears spilled through my eyes and I just got in the car with Madison. We were on our way to Pattie's and I broke down in the car. I was crying silently with my head bowed down on Madison. My head rested on my hand with me hovering above her. I could feel her tiny eyes piercing throw my soul and so I did what I had to do for Maddie. I sat up and wiped my tears and promised her that I would never treat her the way I was treated.

A/N: Harry Styles FanFiction will be out next year.. Sounds far away but it gives new 6 months to finish this book. Before we know it, it'll be a whole new year. Sorry if I disappointed some but you guys wanted a sequel and that's what I'm doing (: another update will be done later but I'm not sure honestly at what time.