Depression Hit Me Hard

5: Confused

Monday came about as fast as lightning and when I reached school, everyone had their eyes on me. Woah. When was the last time I had this much attention? Probably in 2nd Grade when I came out of the Girls' washroom with a long piece of tissue at the back side of my pants.

I overheard whispers about me and Alfie. What the hell is happening?

Then, as I was walking to my classroom for the first period, I felt someone pulled me by my hair all the way to the Girls' washroom and that's when I realized it was Jessica who had pulled me. Oh, probably I should tell a bit more about Jessica. Jessica was one of my childhood best friend. But it all fell apart when she backstabbed me in 4th Grade and I swear it was embarrassing. Somehow she hated me, just because I wasn't famous. I am a loser. The last thing she ever said to me?

"I don't want to be friends with you anymore, Ally. You're a loser. I don't hang out with losers, it's lame."

That's when I knew. Had I been used all those time? Well, now she had her own minions and I only have Brienna. Apparently Brienna wasn't in the same class as me for the first period.

"What's all of this for? You minded your own business all this while and now you're suddenly doing this to me? What's up with you?" I shouted at her.

"Woah woah woah. Look at this loser talking, oh my god I'm so scared," she said sarcastically.

"Seriously though. Why are you doing this? Dragging your minions along ugh," I stood up for myself.

"You bitch!" Jessica took a step towards me, but her minions hold her back.

Then she continued,"All this time, were you blind? Alfie's all over you. And I'm gonna make it stop, because he belongs with me."

Wait what. Alfie's all over you. What does it mean? All this time I thought Alfie likes Jessica because everytime I see him he's either with Jessica or Nick.

"W-what are you talking about?" I asked, acknowledging the fact that Alfie is in a relationship with Jessica and it couldn't be he liked me!

"Oh don't you act all innocent. He's been ignoring me lately and a few days ago I saw him putting a note up in your locker. Every single day I saw him staring at you from afar in the hallway when I walk to school with him. Don't you get that hint already? You're so retarded! Don't you dare steal him away from me," Jessica screamed and then stormed off, along with her minions.

It' all happening too fast for me to handle. Does Alfie actually like me? But why does he avoid me every time? I'm so confused.

Since Math is the first period, I make my way up to class and sat beside Alfie awkwardly. For the first time ever, he began to speak.

"Hey" he said casually.

"Hello," I acknowledged his presence.

"What's up?" he asked.

"What do you mean 'What's up'? All this time you've been ignoring me and now you're suddenly talking? I think you're better off with Jessica. Just stop, stop talking to me. Stop making my life miserable. I've had enough drama in my life, I don't need you to be one of them," I boomed.

I was shocked. I was never that kind of girl. It just slipped out of my mouth. Guess I had enough.

"Look, I don't know what Jessica is doing to you but I'm sorry," he muttered.

Too late to be sorry, Alfie.

Basically the whole day at school included talking to Alfie and being bullied by Jessica whenever Brienna is not around. I hate her I really really do. It's not my fault Alfie likes me! Anyway, whenever Alfie speaks, I don't really feel anything like I used to. I have mixed feelings. Is it because of Alfie avoiding me completely before, and now he's suddenly talking? I don't know.

This whole week sucks, I've been crying and cutting in the middle of the night. Alfie's been avoiding me again just because of what happened recently and Jessica kept bullying me. Yeah, she even filled my locker up with slime, making a huge mess. Thanks Jessica. Thanks a lot.