Dear Who Ever,
He and I just broke up today. Basically because he couldn't wait for *certain things. He feels horrible, a lot. I did feel horrible and heart broken but now I just feel numb and determined. I am determined to stay numb because I couldn't handle the Tsunami of pain and heart ache that will come crashing down. I refuse to cry a single tear for him. I know he didn't mean to hurt me but he did and he doesn't deserve any of my tears. All of a sudden he just doesn't like me as much as he thought he did. He even said 'I love you'. I didn't because I wanted to at least wait a few months, if not years, before I made that kind of commitment. He was my first kiss. I won't ever get that back but I am glad it ended before I gave away some thing much more precious than that. Now I am just trying to be strong. I only have two more days of school left this week so I don't have long to go. When the weekend comes then I will break down. This all just feels like a bad dream. I can't even think on whether or not I've lost his friendship for good. I'm not reacting how girls usually do. I cried for a little bit but now I'm just not. I could if I let myself but I just won't let myself. It's weird. I'm not mad at him one bit, not even a little. Sure he broke my heart but now all I can think about is if he is okay. He is obviously not okay. It hurts me more to see him in such pain than the actual break up. I really hope he heals fast... </3
-Your Faithful Writer
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I dedicate this entry to Angela M. for always being there for me through all of my hard times. Thanks for being so compassionate :) I love you with my whole heart <3 (and then some..)
