Not Fine at All (Luke Hemmings a.u.)

Chapter 27

LUKE'S POV

"Come on, Luce. We're going to sleep. Enough of this." I reach for her to pull her closer to me but she scoots away slowly. That is when the slight panic begins to set in.

"You don't get it, Luke. I'm serious. I really am pregnant; I just found out today." I watch in disbelief as she nervously shifts her eyes to stare at the ceiling, eyes batting quickly to ward off tears. This could not be happening, not to me.

"How do you know?" I question, though I am only trying to stall the inevitable.

"I've been sick for days, puking nonstop and so Kelsey finally offered to take me to the store. She showed me the tests and encouraged that I buy one just to be safe."

I should've known Calum's ex had something to do with this.  She always seemed to be sticking her nose in everyone else's business. 

"So the test came out positive then?" I swallow hard.

"Yes," she nods. "I just used it and then threw it away. Michael must've been snooping around the bathroom and found it in the trashcan or something. I never meant for you to find out this way, honestly..."

"You're pregnant," I state, still praying that this is some sort of joke and the hidden reality TV cameramen will jump out from the closet to film my reaction. Her grave nod proves to me that this is not the case. "There is a baby growing inside here? Really?" I ask, venturing to pat her on the stomach. She pales at my touch and I know now this isn't a revamped episode of Punk'd and Ashton Kutcher probably isn't eavesdropping from the next room over.

I run my hand through my hair anxiously, and I can already feel it going gray from the impending stress. She's pregnant. My girlfriend is actually pregnant with my baby. There's no way around this and I don't even dare to pinch myself to test whether or not I'm awake for fear of embarrassing her more than I can tell she already is.

This was a disaster. An unwanted pregnancy was something every guy in his right mind dreaded, something that haunted their every dream and kept them awake at night. It was the kind of unexpected surprise that throws a guy for a loop and either sends them running for the hills, or dooms him too soon to a future he wasn't fully prepared for.

But surprisingly, I don't feel doomed. Not even a little bit. And I wouldn't even call this pregnancy unwanted, just unplanned. I mean, deep down I had always known that Lucey and I were bound to be together one way or another. Even after she'd left me, I knew we would find our way back to each other because that's just the kind of plan the fates seemed to have drafted for the two of us. Sure, I was beyond heartbroken at first, but I never lost sight of the many dreams I had of marriage and an eventual family with her. I knew I didn't want that with anyone else and I prayed every night that she felt the same.

So really, there is nothing to worry about at all. We aren't just a careless teenage couple anymore. We are still young, of course, but I have a steady job, and a house, and plenty of people around to help us with anything and everything. Lucey and I are in love; that is a fact, and it is not a claim every pregnant couple can make. A baby can't threaten our relationship, only strengthen it. Not to mention this process will be a hell of a lot easier given the fact that neither of us have much to do with our self-righteous, judgmental parents. We have none of the worries that many other people in our situation may have, and for that, I am very grateful.

We can handle this. I have faith, and I know that right now I need to show that to Lucey. She must be terrified right now, probably praying desperately that I don't leave her on the spot. 

Sure enough, when I finally snap out of my thoughts and risk a look at her, there is a single tear trailing down her cheek and instantly my heart breaks.

"Why are you crying?" I ask cautiously, my brow beginning to furrow instinctively.

"I just don't know what to do." Her voice is dangerously shaky and I can tell that she is choking back sobs.

"Do about what? We'll be fine," I try to reassure her. And we will be.

"But I'm pregnant, Luke. Not to mention this is totally unexpected. I mean, after what happened with Matt, I didn't even think it could be a possibility..." 

She trails off and I can tell that she is on the verge of a flashback. In an attempt to calm her, I cup her face in my hands and rub my thumbs across her damp cheeks.

"Hey, don't cry. This is fine, Lucey. We will be fine."

"How can you say that?" she whimpered quietly.

"Just because. We're adults now, baby. I've got a job, we have a place to live. It's not like we're irresponsible kids anymore. And I love you. God, I love you so much, and I know that a kid would only strengthen that bond. I'm not a stupid teenage boy who's going to drop you just because of an accident. Yeah, maybe we should have been more careful, but I think that everything happens for a reason. If you want, we could even go ahead and get married. I've probably saved enough money for at least a decent ring and shit, I have no idea who I would choose for my best man but..."

I trail off as my thoughts consume me. Though I'm not entirely sure where all of this is suddenly coming from, I know that all of it sounds right. I do want a wife, and a kid, maybe even two or three, and the stereotypical house in the suburb with a dog and a tree-house and assorted plastic tricycles littering the front yard. And I want it all with her. With Lucey. With the beautiful, vibrant redhead in front of me who has just begun to smile again.

"What?" I ask, not bothering to hide my goofy grin.

"You're right. You're absolutely right. We can handle this. Both of us have certainly seen harder times, and I have no doubt that we are capable of raising a child together."

"Besides," I add, "the kid will have plenty of uncles to help us along the way."

Lucey laughs, and I am reminded why it is the most beautiful sound in the world. I'm so ready to take on this adventure with her. 

"That is true, but we are never letting Michael babysit."

"Agreed," I chuckle.

"I love you so much," she sighs as she snuggles up against me.

"And I love you," I whisper into her soft hair as she drifts off to sleep.

I watch her in silence for a few precious moments before letting my mind wander to thoughts of marriage proposals and diaper bags and it was then that it hit me how real all of this is. She is here, with me, after all this time and we are making so much progress. She's opened up to me emotionally, and I feel like we have worked out all of the issues that may have prevented us from being fully happy before. She is here to stay now and I am here to protect her from the pain of her past. We will make it this time, I know it for sure. Nothing is going to keep us from our happily ever after.

And oh, yeah. We are having a baby.