Unforgivable Lacerations

Chapter Thirty-Two

The woman in front of me, scared, alone and regret were evident features on her face. They shone out in her deep brown eyes that looked beyond what was present in the room, beyond this world. Her delicate white hair, thin and long, threaded down her back as she laid still, and her skin, thousands upon thousands of wrinkles sat, still, each line telling a story of how the poor woman received them gradually over time. 

The room around her was gray, no color present, which only made the wise doe eyes, brimming with knowledge, stand out. 

"It's my time to go now," her voice, shivering with fear as she spoke over the lump in her throat, whispered. The two stray tears didn't miss my attention as she opened her mouth again. 

"You can take me now, I'm ready," her smile, fake to me, would seem so real to the ignorant people around her. They never paid attention to this woman, they dismissed her as she was never one to gossip about others or spew lies about how 'happy' her dull life was. 

The dark shadow that was situated in the unlighted corner, stepped forward as it branched its dark wings almost silently, raven eyes focused on the poor dear that was ready. Lightly, the fallen angel caressed the pure woman's cheek. The only word that was left to say then fell from her lips. 

I knew it was me when she said it. The woman, stepping into the depths of death, looking so alone was me. 

"Edward," was her last word that would forever be on her lips. 

 My eyes flashed open, searching my surroundings as my body laid still. It was just a dream...but would that be how I went? Alone. Cold. No family or friends surrounding me as I was forbidden any close friendship. I didn't want to trust anyone because it always ended in a 'goodbye', so I would just live my days living in my imagination of the 'what ifs'.

"That's my future," I whimpered, before realizing where I was. 

Due to my sleep pattern, I had woken up six hours after I had drifted. Breakfast consisted of the last two cold pieces of pizza. I would have thought that I could have devoured the whole pizza in the first minutes I had bought it, but my stomach size had shrunk into hardly anything; leaving me with the remains that were now called breakfast.

I cleaned some of my cuts with the alcohol wipes- screaming through my teeth as I did so- and placed a clean Band-Aid over the older gashes. Sadly, some of my cuts from weeks back had become infected, with vile yellow puss emerging to the surface and constant pain, the area would feel as if it was burning one minute and then the next it would feel frozen; but I couldn't do anything about it.

I changed into some clean clothes and then headed to the reception to sign out. Once I had, I strapped myself in the car and followed the directions to Grand Rapids.

*_*_*_*_*

I had arrived.

The sounds and smells of the city excited me, while it also terrified me. The excitement came from the hope of a new beginning; I could be anyone now, well, until I would have to move again in a week. I wouldn't risk staying in one place for too long. The fear came from the masses of people; the reason why I felt the city was safer was because I could blend in, mask my scent and not be the center of attention. If I went to a small town, the gossip of my arrival would be like a wildfire and easier for the pack to find me.

Despite the benefits of living in a city, I felt strangely claustrophobic, it was as if I was in a glass box and everyone surrounding me scrammed easily around, while I couldn't escape this box and no one could break through. I was the prime example of an outcast. 

I had arrived at the motel, the one I had called and booked a room for. The cheap one. The saying of "you get what you paid for" sprang into mind as I knocked open the wooden door of the room I specifically asked to be on the ground floor. I couldn't keep walking up and down the steps with a broken leg.