the baby cullen

chapter 8 ~ Christmas present for my beloved

The days and weeks passed, until December had finally come about. Christmas was nearing my dark horizon; my unending dark times still lingered in the even darker shadows of my heart and mind.

Christmas was usually a happy time in our household; my sisters and mother darting around the house, decorating every inch of walls, tabletop and stair case banister they could possibly find. My father and brother's would hang the outside lights, lighting the darkness around the house, with thousands of twinkling lights of green, red and white. Emmett claimed it was a very sure way of Santa Clause to locate our house, and give Santa's reindeer a proper landing strip; I laughed when he told me that. Not to mention Edward playing Christmas songs on his piano, for me. He taught me to play jingle bells; when I was five.

My mother would bake dozens of cookies for me; while Edward and my father would spoil me with every type of boxed chocolates, money could buy. Alice and Rosie would take me shopping to find a special Christmas day dress; claiming it was only proper way to celebrate Christmas morning, and I wasn't one to turn down a shopping trip. Jasper would help me lay out milk and cookies for Santa and a few carrots for his reindeer; when I awoke Christmas morning, both the cookies and carrots would be nibbled and the glass of milk would be half gone.

Edward even went as far as giving me a present corresponding to the twelve days of Christmas; only the partridge in the pear tree was only a decoration...I didn't care, it was the thought that counted in my eyes. I loved it all the same. The five golden rings however, were very much real; the first gold ring had a little snowflake shaped diamond in bedded in the tiny claws of the ring. The second gold ring had a carved opal—my birthstone—angel sitting on top the gold band; the third gold ring had a dozen tiny rubies in the shape of a heart laid right into the gold ring itself. The fourth ring had an array of emeralds in the shape of a Christmas tree, with a diamond shaped as a star for the topper. Lastly was my fifth ring, and most beautiful by far; a snowman, made up of three diamonds with tiny black Alaskan diamonds for the eyes and buttons a ribbon of gold for the scarf and a carved black pearl of his hat.

But none of these things were to happen this Christmas; this was our first Christmas without Edward, and no one wanted to celebrate this year. My parents and siblings went through the motions for me, of course, but it still didn't feel right without Edward here. The piano room and the piano itself were still locked; I refused to give up the keys, and told my family, I had a perfectly good piano in my music room to use. My father didn't push the subject any father.

My Aunts and Uncles from Denali were joining us for Christmas this year; I knew the main reason behind them coming here was to keep me as preoccupied as possible. To not dwell on the fact that Edward would not be joining us this year; I was still heartbroken, but I tried to put on the best happy face I could for all of my family.

Christmas Eve day, was very eventful; my brothers and Uncles took me sledding after breakfast, until I was cold and hungry enough to go home—it was past noon when we walked in the front door. In the afternoon, I ended up passing out watching 'A Muppet Christmas Carol' with Emmett; he liked watching cartoons with me—I knew he was using my age appropriate television shows as an out to watch them for himself—He is such a big kid at heart.

After dinner—well my dinner—we put all of our presents under the Christmas tree; of course the dominating pile of presents was mostly mine, but there were a significant amount of other presents under the tree. I asked my father, if I could stay up late.

"You know Santa, only comes when you are fast asleep princess." He told me, as he carried me to my bed; half asleep, already. I tried to press my case, but I was asleep before my head could hit the pillow.

I slept dreamlessly that night, waking to a winter wonderland outside; it had snowed a good three or four feet, overnight. I squealed jumping out of bed, my little feet speeding towards the stairs when I was caught around the waist and tossed up in the air.

"Uncle Garrett...did he come?" I asked giggling as he tickled my ribs, laughing along with me. "Did Santa come last night?" I demanded breathless, from all of the giggling.

"I don't know...Bella...he may have." He teased me walking at an exaggerated slow pace, down the two flights of stairs.

"Don't tease the poor girl!" My auntie Katie laughed taking me from my uncle; she snuggled me close and kissed my cheek. "Merry Christmas, sweet pea."

"Merry Christmas auntie Katie" I replied hugging her, kissing her cheek. "Do you know where my daddy is?"

She gave me a funny look for a moment, and then smiled brightly at me; I knew that look, my father was having a private moment. He missed Edward, so much; although my heart was aching, just as badly for the one heart sang for, I knew if I tried to be happy, then so would the rest of my family. I knew that my family revolved around me and Edward; then after he left, it was just me; I tried to be happy for my family all the time.

After breakfast, I had to get my Christmas dress on, before I was allowed to open any of my present; Alice would never let me have my way—If Edward, were here, I would still be in my pajamas, running around the room, swimming in all of the wrapping paper that was lying around on the floor—I had so many presents to open, it nearly took me an hour.

I had noticed that my father was still nowhere in sight and I had a feeling, I knew where he was; he was in Edward's room. Usually, I would have been furious with him, for going in there, when I had banned everyone from his room. But I could not fault him for this. I waited for everyone to disperse from the room and grabbed two presents from under the Christmas tree, and made my way up to Edward's room.

I was right; my father was sitting at the foot of Edward's bed, his legs shoulder width apart, elbows on his knees and hands in his face and his body slumped over in defeat and sadness. My heart ached for my father; I wished every day, for my father's pain to leave him and never return. I was angry at Edward, for causing my father this pain. Pushing the door open with a little nudge, my father looked up, our eyes met and he looked so sad and lost; he silently beckoned me to join him, I closed the door behind me—it was a sign to the rest of my family to leave us alone—and joined him on the bed sitting beside him.

I laid my head on his shoulder, and sat just as silent as he; neither one of us knew what to say; because no matter what either one of said to each other, the pain would never stop, for either of us. Silently I handed him his Christmas gift.

"Merry Christmas Daddy" I whispered.

"Merry Christmas princess" He whispered back.

I had gotten my father a platinum plated pen; with the words' Daddy's Little Princess' inscribed on the little clip.

"I love it, a perfect reminder of who is awaiting me when I come home every day after work." He said smiling down at me.

"You're welcome daddy; thank you for all of my gifts as well, I loved them all." I replied. "He's not coming home for Christmas...is he?" I asked; already knowing the answer.

"No, sweetheart, he's not; but where ever he is...he knows we love him and miss him."

It was a sad Christmas without a doubt; with many more to come. Before my father and I left Edward's room, I left the present that I had bought for him, on his leather sofa. Closing the door behind us, my father gave me back Edward's room key, to place back in my jewelry box—for safe keeping—the rest of the day and night was much like our morning; quiet and very much missing the brother, the missing son and the missing part of my heart-our hearts.

A/N: Hey all! I am so sorry this chappy took me so long. Life has been a little hectic lately and unfortunately reality comes first. Thanks again xxxx loves yee