I Love You

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Nov. 15

Dear Alex,

We spent last night in the back of your car, parked on the shore, listening to the waves crash against the rocks. The lighthouse beam stroked the water and lit up the distance just enough that I could see your outline, the faint colour of you, wrapped around me. But what was more prevalent was your heat- an aurora seeping through your pores and surrounding me.

We kissed slow and long- harder than I've kissed in a long, long time. Remember that day, after the last football game, when it was raining and our team lost, and you came out of the change room with your head down. When you looked up and saw me, I noticed you were crying, but you smiled a crocked little smile that failed through the tears. I took your hand and you led me underneath the bleachers and we kissed and felt the warmth of each other and we morphed into one another.

That's what this was. It was a becoming-one sort of kiss. You slipped your hands behind my neck and I took them and pressed them to my hips, your fingertips under the hem of my shirt. When you didn't move them, I started wiggling out of my shirt, and I had one arm out of the arm hole before you pressed a finger to my lips.

"Don't," you said.

"But I want to."

"No, don't do this."

"But I'm ready."

As I said it, you helped my arm back through the arm hole and you lied down with me under your arm.

"I love you," you whispered.

I curled up deeper into your chest and heaved a breath.

"Thank you," I whispered.

Because you really do love me. You really, really do. Sean- he wanted me to prove it. But not you- you're different. You're the most beautiful creation I have ever come across and I love you I love you I love you.

Love,

Carrie

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