STAY · Thomas Sangster x Reader

-nineteen-

You woke up in the middle of the night. Well, not really 'woke up' because you can't sleep so you went down stairs and made coffee/tea.

You sat by the window staring at the stars. You had one wish right now, and that was for you to see the stars one last time with your mom. The memory of her made you realize it was all your fault. You told her to let go and she did. Sadness quickly became anger. You threw the now empty mug to the wall beside the window. You were sobbing on the floor. Until you heard steps coming from behind. You saw your dad. He looked worst than before.
"Dad. I-im sorry I woke you up"
"What's that all about darling? What are you doing up late?"
"I think you already know." You sat on the sofa and your dad did the same. It was silent until you decided to speak.
"It's all my fault dad. I told her to let go and she did. I-"
"It wasn't your fault y/n. She didn't have to let go. She just wanted you to know everything is going to be okay if she let go because she's in a better place now. No more pain and suffering. She no longer wants us to see her almost dying" You saw how all this affected your dad just looking at his eyes talking about mom.
"Doesn't she love me anymore? Why did she want me to tell her to let go?"
"You helped her y/n. You helped her get to a place without suffering. You helped her be free and not worry about her. She didn't want you to worry to death. She loves you. Loves us. Losing her doesn't mean she isn't in our hearts y/n. It does not end our love for her."
"But why didn't you tell me sooner? I could've dne something. This-"
"You can't do anything about it y/n!" You were shocked by the sudden change of emotion. You never heard your dad scream like this before. But you understood why so instead, you just hugged him and whispered "I'm sorry" while he cried on your shoulder. This was the time for you to comfort the one who used to be strong, used to be the one to protect you. But because the love of his life passed everything changed.
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"You can't do anything about it y/n!"
Those words repeated in my head again and again. It wasn't because dad shouted it at me but why couldn't I do anything? mom should've told me. Why would she hide it from me?