Neglected Desires

Chapter 16

I have no idea how long I sat on that leather couch watching as he worked through a new song idea. Still in just his boxers, sitting at the board, he held his blue guitar as his ears searched for the right sound. Long fingers moved effortlessly along the fretboard; he was fine tuning the same melody he had been working on for most of the night. I laid curled up on the sofa as his eyes studied his agile fingers and I watched his features change while he developed the song. His eye lids would close, the faintest of grins lifting his lips, when he was pleased with the sounds coming from the guitar. As he found a note or a progression that didn't suit him his brow would furrow and his eyes would open, momentarily watching his offending fingers, before resetting to the part he was please with and trying again. It was a fascinating process to watch, but at some point I must have dozed off. My eyes fluttered open as he lowered by tired body into his bed.

"Hey." My voice no more than a whisper as our eyes met. The broad smile on his lips made my heart jump slightly.

"Hey baby."  Arms released me to the plush comfort of silk sheets. "This will be more comfortable than that couch." Warm lips landed quickly on my forehead as the blanket was pulled up over me, wrapping my hand around his wrist before he finished.

"Lay with me until I fall back to sleep." I knew him well enough to know he hadn't planned on staying, but his eyes told me he would. Climbing in behind me, arms wrapped around my waist, pulling me back tight against his chest. I fell back to sleep as he quietly hummed that same tune behind me, continuing to work out the sound.

He spent the majority of the next day in the studio and I tried to leave him to it. Over the years that we've been friends I've learned that his music is an vital part of how he handles stress and works through life's challenges. At the same time I know that if left to his own devices he would stay buried in his studio cocoon until someone forced him out. I tried to busy myself with some writing I had to get done for work and a not so quick call to Alysha to see how things were going with her and Kevin. By early afternoon I'd decided to surprise him, knowing full well this idea could blowup on my face.

A quick run to the grocery store and I had everything i needed to get things started and since Prince had sent everyone home to give us privacy for a few days the kitchen was all mine. Hours later i looked at the time on my watch and made a mental note before quietly stepping into the studio. Sitting on the now familiar leather couch I listened as he worked through a bass line I'd never heard before. I closed my eyes and let my head rest back as the music flowed over me, filling the room. After a while the music stopped and I looked up to find him facing me with a quizzical look on his face.

"Hey" the first word is spoke to him all day came out quieter than normal. His expression  was stoic, I couldn't make heads or tails of what he was thinking. His lips rolled in briefly before parting to speak.

"What's up?" He turned his chair around and scribbled quickly on the pad of paper in front of him.

"You wanna have dinner with me in a bit?"

"I don't wanna leave the studio." He answered quick without turning to face me.

"Ok, maybe I'll bring something in here for you, so you don't have to leave." In all honesty I just wanted to make sure he ate because I know he hasn't eaten in hours, if at all today.

"Sure, that'd be great." He responds without really paying me any mind. Without a word I slipped out of the studio and left him to his work and headed back to the kitchen. Part of me was disappointed because I'd hoped he would agree to dinner with me. I knew his tour rehearsals would start the next day and this would be our last piece of truly free time for a while, but I also wasn't surprised. Back in the kitchen I made two plates of my homemade macaroni & cheese and mixed green salad. I left my plate on the kitchen table before adding one of my fresh baked chocolate chip cookies to his and heading down to the studio with it. Without making a sound I opened the door and set his dinner quietly on the table just inside before leaving and returning to my dinner.

Sitting in the quiet kitchen, I put my feet up on the vacant chair across the table from me. I've never been a fan if eating alone, but part of me always thought this is what being with Prince would be like. He wouldn't always be around, even when he was, and that was something I had to come to terms with if this was going to work. The sound of a plate being sat on the table brought me out of my thoughts and I watched as Prince slid a chair up to my right side.

"You didn't say you made me dinner." I glanced at his plate and not a single bite had been taken. "I don't remember the last time someone cooked for me that I wasn't paying." A shy laugh followed his words. I watched as he took his first bite and nodded in approval.

"You like it?" Another vigorous nod. I felt my face erupt in a large smile before I took another bite. We ate mostly in silence and I held in a small giggle when he was finished and leaned back in his chair like he had just eaten a thanksgivings meal and not just salad and pasta.

"I'm sorry for disappearing today." His hand resting on my jean covered thigh as he turned to face me. I shook my head and placed my hand on top of his, rubbing my thumb over the top of his hand.

"It's fine, I understand. You have a process and a way of doing things and I don't want to be in the way of that." His lips parted slightly as he studied my face with an unreadable expression.  His deep eyes looked almost confused for a brief moment.

"I'm gonna have to get used to this."

"To what exactly?" My right eyebrow raising.

"In the past, girlfriends have never understood all of this. But you..."

"We have a past, most of your past girlfriends just came on the scene." Wrapping my fingers around his hand and squeezing lightly. "We have a history. I might know you better than you think I do."

"I never would have told any of my past girlfriends what I told you last night."

"I know."

"I'm used to keeping big pieces of myself hidden, but you already know so much, I feel so..."

"Vulnerable?" I finished after his long search for the right word. His sheepish grin told me that was the word. "Me too." Without a word he brought his lips to mine in a deep kiss. His soft lips danced against mine, his tongue invading my mouth without hesitation. My free hand came up to his neck, trailing into his open white button up shirt, letting my fingers trail through the hair on his chest. Pulling back from me he caught his breath.

"People won't start shoring up until 9 tomorrow morning." His hand rubbing my thigh. "We have all night. You have anything in mind." A blush came across my cheeks as I remembered what I'd seen.

"Yeah actually," standing and pulling him along by his hand, "I have a question about something I saw."

"And what's that?" Confusion covered his face as I left the kitchen with him in tow.

"I think it's better if I show you." And with that I quietly led him up to his office...