Chapter 15: Honesty

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Never have you ever seen rose turns to dust?
Never have you ever seen dusk turns to dawn so quickly?
Never have you ever seen river flows to the shore oppositely?

If you ever,
You must have seen denial in impossible things
Though sometimes, the truth is in between

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"What should I do now? I'm feeling she's running away from me," Paul smacked his luxury bronze wood desk in his bedroom with anger. "She said, I can't talk about it now. It's bloody obvious, man. Totally obvious that she's still unsure with me!"

Paul tightened his grip as if the bloods were heated up in his body like fire. He paced back and forth with anger in his face. Alex sat on a dark green sofa across the bed with both of his hands intertwined on his lap.

"What did she say to you last night?" Paul asked as he stopped pacing back and forth then stood near the window with scenery of the backyard of his house. His grandfather had always been busy taking care of his French restaurant in Back Bay, Boston. Paul was born from a wealthy and famous family in Paris. He always got anything he wanted in just one clap, so when he was not able and had some issues to get what he wanted, he would never give up on it.

"She didn't want to talk about it. But I saw her writing something on her journal as usual and–", Paul cut Alex before he finished his sentence and raised his eyebrow suspiciously. "What do you mean usual?"

Alex was stiff as his eyes widened thinking about the proper answer should be because Alex used to notice Lou with her journal and he didn't want Paul to think that Alex had met her before the previous day. He gulped and answered, "I mean usual, because I believe that must be her habit. Writing stuff in their journal when feeling sad, I'm just assuming that is her usual thing, isn't it?"

Paul smirked as he continued, "Yes, she likes to write about her feelings in that black fine leather journal. I think that journal knows her better than I do."

Alex was relieved as he slowly exhaled to know that his answer saved him from being a creep. Alex stood up and took the key of his Audi A6 from the round small table next to the sofa.

"I've got to see the lecturer to discuss about my thesis. I'll be back after that," excused Alex as he put both of his hands in his pocket.

"Can you postpone the meeting? Your friend is frustrating here and could've committed suicide after you left," Paul smirked as he rolled his eyes. "Is that a friend?"

Alex smirked as he stroked his hair, "You're a man. Seriously. I'm leaving, see ya"

"Leave, just leave, you nerd!" shouted Paul as Alex left the room.

Alex started the engine and reversed the car to the road. When he drove the car for a few miles, he instantly honked as he smashed the steering wheel for five times when the red sedan passed his car in zigzag from the right side. He quickly pulled over and stopped the car. Alex sighed as he wiped his face and smashed the steering wheel over and over again.

"This is unfair!" he squeezed his forehead as he closed his eyes. "Why am I even helping my friend when I know that I'm somehow falling in love with his ex-girlfriend actually?!"

Alex took a deep breath as he leaned his head against the seat then he opened his eyes as he realized about something, "Poetry class at 4. Lou must be there, I should talk to her."

He started the engine, put his right foot on the gas pedal and rushed himself to college. As Alex had arrived, he ran quickly through the corridor and found Mrs. Smith walking with sheets of paper on her hand. Without hesitation, Alex ran towards her.

"Mrs. Smith!" Alex called her name from behind as he ran towards her. "Mrs. Smith! Wait!"

Mrs. Smith turned her head around and saw Alex running towards her and she stopped, "Alex? You look like you're being chased by a dog. What happened?"

Mrs. Smith once had Alex to participate in her exhibition in The Museum of Fine Arts, Boston in the previous year. She really admired his poems until Alex was known as one of the best poets to her.

"Where will the poetry class be held?" said Alex, gasping for breath.

"In the Boylston Hall, Room 110. I'm lecturing now. Are you looking for someone?" asked Mrs. Smith, worried.

Alex bid her goodbye and ran to the Boylston Hall as soon as he could make it. When he arrived at the hall, many students just came out from class and he found it hard to look for Lou. As he reached the lavatory, he saw a girl in brown bomber jacket and mini black skirt with black tights. Alex walked towards her quickly, he wanted to call her name out loud but he was afraid if it wasn't the person that he was looking for. He quickly walked passing her and it was her.

"Lou," Alex blocked her way as he stood in front of her. "I need to talk to you."

"Alex," Lou's eyes widened as she looked surprised. In the moment she saw Alex, it suddenly reminded her of Adrien's advice. Without hesitation, she blurted out, "I need to talk to you too."

Alex smiled as he felt relieved somehow then he said, "Um, sure, okay, you first."

"Okay?" Lou looked confused to see Alex acting that way.

"Please, go ahead. After you," answered Alex as his lips both pressed.

She blinked her eyes twice as she shook her head and smiled. "I've been thinking about this. I felt tortured last night and I think I've made up my mind–"

Lou kept talking but Alex couldn't even catch what she said. His thought was completely focused on her bright brown eyes, her perfectly messy brown hair and the way she bits her lips when she forgets what to say. She looked very stunning though her eye-bags looked very dark and exhausting. Alex wanted to take care of her and treat her better than Paul. She deserved someone better and Alex believed that he could be that guy. All Alex wanted to say was, "I've noticed you from the beginning and I have this feeling for you somehow. This is odd but I like you, none of those poems by Shakespeare could explain how much I like you. I know this is wrong because I may betray Paul but I can't deny this feeling, I can't be selfless but please give me a chance to love you,".

"– to Paul?" finished Lou as she bit her lower lip.

Alex was stopped from his train of thoughts until he heard the name of Paul from her mouth. He was about to explode when she said that name but he tried his best to look fine.

"Pardon me, what was it?" Alex squeezed his forehead as he pressed his lips nervously.

"I wanted to talk to Paul, do you know where he is staying?"

Alex closed his eyes for two seconds and sighed heavily. He tried to hide it and forced himself to grin.

"I know where it is," Alex smiled. "I can take you there if you want to,"

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