Ahrianna Victoria Alice Cullen

chapter 34- Me Time

Chapter 34- Me Time

Ahrianna’s POV

It was early on a Tuesday morning when I decided to go for a walk; I needed to clear my head. I could hear all my vampire family members downstairs and all my wolf friends snoring happily in the rooms around me. I looked back at the clock, it read 3:34am, I sighed and glanced at Ness who was sound asleep in the double bed we were sharing while we had guests staying. Silently I grabbed my coat and left the room. Without a doubt if I hadn’t been so gifted with powers someone would have heard me, it was a miracle that I got out without being seen or heard. My shield blocked Edward from reading my thoughts; the wolves that were snoring and breathing covered the sound of my heartbeat. As I made my way down the stairs, I stayed close to the walls, its not that I didn’t want to get caught but that I just didn’t want to explain why. Why I needed to be alone. Moving slowly I decided to go through the kitchen door, no one would be in the kitchen at this time. Turning the last corner I could see the door, just as I neared it I turned to look through the house, all I could see was the dining room, which lead through to where all my family were in the living room.

 Something caught my eye as I went to open the door, I looked back and saw Jasper had appeared from somewhere, he was stood in the dining room; he gave me a quizzical look. Just as I was about to give up and explain, giving myself up so the rest of my family knew what I was doing. Jasper winked at me and carried on back into the living room. This was my chance; I quickly turned and left the house without a sound. Thanking and praying Jasper wouldn’t say anything.

Walking away from my loving, warm home made me sad, even if it was only going to be for a little while, I couldn’t imagine myself living anywhere else or having another family. Now that I had cleared the house I ran as quickly as possible, my legs taking me as far as they could go. I couldn’t bare to think that one of my family members could hear or follow me. Running through the trees brought back so many memories, of pain and fear. Fear of the world, fear of my father, the physical pain he had put me through, the mental pain also. I hadn’t realised I had collapsed to the floor and was in flood of tears, sometimes the world got too much for me. Knowing I had come far enough away from civilisation I let my mind go, releasing my shield, expressing my emotions, trying not to hold everything in my mind I let it out. Screaming the pain away.

After a while I came back to myself, I controlled my emotions and reined in my shield. My mind felt liberated, and I felt like myself once again. I rose to my wobbly legs and wiped my face, my ice-cold hands felt nice on my puffy eyes. I looked at my surroundings; white snow covered everything, making the landscape look magical. My eyes wandered towards the sky, I could see the sun making an appearance through the branches of trees, creating rays of light. Closing my eyes I felt some fall onto my face warming it slightly, slowly I opened my eyes and saw rays of different coloured light dancing off my face. I smiled to myself and darted though the trees back to my home, back to my family.

As I ran back to the house, I thought about what had just happened. If any one of my family members had seen that they would surely think I was mental. I winced the thought of anyone seeing that. Sometimes I just need some space, I grew up alone, with no one to care for me or love me, now I have more people than I can count. I admit I bury the pain from my past so it doesn’t effect my future, I shuddered at the thought of anyone in my family really knowing what had happened when I was little. I had only let them know some details, the most painful one I had hid. And now with all my powers, my mind gets overwhelmed and I need to let off some steam. I always have be aware of my shield, especially around Nicolas, I smiled at that though. Also having to keep my emotions in check, as my emotions can affect people around me I have to make sure they are controlled. As I thought about all the reasons I needed these little breaks, I neared the house. I double-checked my shield was securely in place so that Edward could not hear my thoughts and made sure my emotions were reasonable.