Slightly Less Badass

~Chapter Seventeen~

Just as I predicted, family dinner was very dull. When we arrived the table was already set and dinner was cooked so before we could even take off our shoes Mom was ushering us into the dining room. The first twenty minutes of the meal just consisted of small talk and Rina and I talking about our vacation. As always Mom was the only one who seemed cheerful about this dinner. Dad was smiling and laughed at the appropriate times but I could tell he was hardly paying attention. Cameron didn't even attempt to hide his boredom. Della looked like she'd rather be someone else but as the minutes passed she reluctantly seemed more energetic about it. It's not like I don't enjoy spending time with my family, it's just that these dinners always seem so pointless. We never discuss anything other than how our week has been and comment on how good the food was. But I sat through it grudgingly and hide my suffering like Dad did. When Mom announced that it was desert time, my attention suddenly focused. You would think that I would get tired of desert food since I own a bakery but I don't think I ever will. Mom carries out a yummy looking chocolate cake topped with rainbow sprinkles and a side of vanilla ice cream- my favorite. I instantly know that something is up because Mom never randomly makes you your favorite dessert. We have always taken turns on who's favorite gets served. We went in order by age of who picked it next.
"That's no fair! It's supposed to be my turn. I want cheesecake," Della complains loudly.
"I thought it was my turn," Rina says.
"Yours is after Della's and before mine," I remind her.
"Well I thought it would be appropriate to make Mira's favorite for this special occasion," Mom says with a giant grin. We all stare blankly back at her.
"What occasion?" I ask.
"You made her a cake and she doesn't even know what for. None of us know what you're talking about. I demand a cheesecake!" Della angrily says.
"Seriously?! None of you know what I'm referring to? Oh," Mom says clearly disappointed. "Mira is getting married. I thought we should celebrate."
There was a hesitate pause where everyone was afraid to speak. Mom has a short temper so anything could tick her off. And nobody wanted to tell her the obvious. When I glanced around at the table to see that everyone had their eyes trained on the floor, I decided to be the brave one and break the silence.
"But we already celebrated that."
"Yes but you got re-engaged. I thought that was worthy of celebrating. Especially since, no offense Mira, no one thought you were getting back together."
"Such confidence in me," I mutter.
"I said no offense. Well then, if no one wants cake then I'll just take it back into the kitchen and you all get nothing."
"I'll take some Mom. Thank you. It was very considerate to make me a cake," I say quickly. We could celebrate the wellbeing of Mom's plants for all I care. As long as I get cake. She smirks victoriously and cuts me a very large piece.
"I still think it's stupid that I don't get cheesecake but I guess I'll take some too," says Della. Soon everyone at the table is eating large slices of delicious cake and scoops of ice cream. After me and Rina helped ourselves to seconds and finished it, Mom's strange smile returns. She pulls a large white book off of the floor and starts flipping through the pages. I can tell that this is going to be extremely cheesy and I roll my eyes.
"First person that can tell me the name of this poem gets to take home the leftovers," says Mom. I roll my eyes again. Of course I'm going to win the leftovers. There's no competition.
"No grown-ups allowed,
We're playin-"
Everyone blurts out the answer before she can even finish the second line. "No Grown Ups Allowed by Shel Silverstein."
She glares at us over the top of her book. We quickly shut out mouth and she continues reading. I don't understand why she wouldn't expect us to interrupt her. I had to memorize this for English class freshman year of high school and for nearly a month went around muttering it under my breath. It was really obnoxious of me but by time I had to present, my whole family- including Rina- had learned it as well.
" we're playin a game
And we don't need
"Be-careful" or "don'ts."
No grown-ups allowed.
We're formin' a club,
And the secret oath
Must not be shown.
No grown-ups allowed.
We're goin' out for pizza--
No, no one but me and my crowd.
So just stay away.
Oh, now it's time to pay?
Grown-ups allowed."
Mom sighs and shuts the book. Again everyone if afraid to speak. She's in a very odd mood tonight and could snap at any moment. But once again I'm the only one who dares open their mouth to ask the question we are all thinking.
"Um Mom.. Who gets the leftovers if we all got it right?"
She sighs again, this time more exasperated than reminiscent.
"Doesn't anyone want to know why I randomly read that poem?" she asks.
"No offense but not really. Everything you do is sorta random to us," Cameron says. Mom ignores him.
"Well I read this poem to remind you not to forget about us. Now that you're older and getting married and moving out and everything, just don't forget about your parents, okay? That includes you too Rina; don't forget us or your actual parents. Don't forget to stop by every once in awhile."
"Ugh Mom that was so cheesy. Are you done being weird so we can go watch tv?"
"Fine whatever." She rolls her eyes at us and sets the book on the table. We all hesitantly get up. When she doesn't object, we practically run from the room.
:::::::::::::::::
"I don't think he's going to answer," Rina whispers loudly in my ear. I shove her away and hold the phone closer to my ear. It rings a few more times and I start to think she might be right when the phone clicks.
"Hey," Jay says. "How's dinner."
"Stupid as always. Hey Jay, can Rina and I pretty please have a sleepover? Pretty please?"
Rina giggles and leans on me so I shove her away again.
"Oh god. Who gave you two candy?" Jay replies.
"We might've sort've found Dad's secret stash of candy."
"It was really yummy," Rina says, ripping the phone out of my hand. She puts it on speaker and leans really close to it. "So can I come over and stay the night? Huh Jay?" she says.
"How much candy did you have?"
"A lot," Rina and I both say.
"Um can't you go to Rina's house for the night?" Jay questions. He was hesitant.
"Nah David already told me no. We also asked Jacob if he wants to join our sleepover but he cussed at us so we can't go to his house either. So therefore we need to come over," I tell him.
"Can't you stay at your parents?"
"Sigh. I suppose so. Mom has been acting weird but I'll ask her. I'll be home tomorrow I guess. Love you, bye!"
Before he has the chance to say anything I hang up. I yell loudly and inform my mother that we're staying the night. She doesn't seem to enthusiastic about it but says it's fine. Cameron comes in a few minutes later with his eyebrows raised in disbelief.
"You realize you're grown adults with your own apartments but yet your having a sleepover at your parents house?" he asks.
"Ya so?"
"You're just jealous."
"Um no. I am definitely not jealous." With a scoff he leaves the room. Rina and I lay on the bed in silence, trying to decide what to do now. It's been awhile since we've done something like this and it almost felt kinda awkward. She's been so busy traveling and the Pastry Pages has consumed my life so we haven't made time to hang out like we used to. I get off of the bed and walk over to my old movie collection.
"What do you wanna watch? I only have old movies, all my new ones are at the apartment," I say. The bed creaks as she gets up and she walks over to join me.
"Hmmm... Either She's the Man, Now You See Me, Tangled, Beauty and the Beast, or the Little Mermaid. You can pick which one, I don't care."
"She's the Man. I haven't seen that in awhile," I reply.
"Okie dokie."
"Artichokie."
"No. Stop."
::::::::::::::
Halfway through our third movie, I was getting kinda tired and opened my mouth to tell Rina that I was ready to go to sleep when my phone dinged loudly. I have no idea where my phone is though. I look around at the mess we've made to try to see if it's laying around. It dings again but I still can't find it.
"Have you see my phone?" I ask Rina. She lifts up our blanket and looks in the floor.
"No- oh wait. Check the desk where we set all of the food. I think I saw it there last."
I slowly get up and start searching between our bowls of food. It dings a third time and I'm finally able to locate it. I grab it from under the popcorn bag and walk back over to Rina.
"Who is it?" she asks.
"I don't know. I don't recognize the number."
Together we read the text messages from the unknown number. After reading the second message I'm able to figure out who it is.
Are you still up? (Sorry for texting so late)
If you prank your brother for me then I'll join you
It doesn't matter what you do to him as long as it's funny& you take pics for me
It dings a forth time. I put my phone on silence because the dinging is getting annoying.
It's Eliza by the way
I glance at Rina and I can tell she's thinking the same thing I am. Without asking her what she wants to do, I reply to Eliza- Mission accepted
She couldn't have picked a better night to ask us to do this considering we're already here. Eliza replies with a creepy looking winking emoji. I add her number to my contacts then look up to see what Rina was doing. She was already bent over her long list of pranks, her eyes frantically scanning the wrinkled paper. I look over her shoulder and look at the list with her.
"I originally planned this one for Jacob because it would be funny how mad he'd get but I think the Saran Wrap would be perfect for this mission," Rina mutters, putting way to much thought into this. "What do you think?"
"I agree. Only problem is how much are we Saran Wrapping and will my Mom have enough in her kitchen?"
"Oh good point, good point. Well it's only 11:34 so I can go next door and steal some from my parents. Then if we still need more we can kindly ask Jacob's mom for some."
"Sounds like a plan. I'll get started while you go steal some more."
"Hi ho. Hi ho. It's off the work we go."
"No."